


Skulduggery

by 5c4r13tt



Category: Carol (2015), The Price of Salt - Patricia Highsmith
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternative Perspective, Angst, Drama, Drama & Romance, Eventual Smut, F/F, Lesbian Sex, Murder Mystery, Mystery, Organized Crime, Slow Burn, Smut, Timeline Shenanigans
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-31
Updated: 2019-06-22
Packaged: 2019-08-11 09:50:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 47,784
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16473275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/5c4r13tt/pseuds/5c4r13tt
Summary: Life had never been easy for Carol Aird. She always seemed to be crashing from one part of her life to the next. It is now time to crash again, only this time in her free fall, she meets a waitress and aspiring photographer, Therese Belivet. Could she be caught this time? Or is she travelling too fast to survive impact?- This is basically my try at a Mystery take on Carol and Therese's story. Full of Lies, deceit, love and betrayal.





	1. The Prelude

Carol wasn’t quite sure how she had ended up here, bruises darkening on her neck, wrapped up in a crewneck jumper that didn’t belong to her, tensing and relaxing her jaw as she leant upon her knees, sat on the bed which hung from the wall, staring at her cheese sandwich and bottled water that lay untouched in the middle of the cell…

Except she was entirely sure of how she got here. She knew each step, each decision, and each misplaced action that had landed her to the very spot she sat in. Cold, alone, and wondering at which point it went all wrong.

And once she had driven herself into a circle she began thinking of all the signs she had missed that had forewarned this very ending. There were many. And as voices approached her, ones she vaguely recognised, she realised that she would have to relive them all.

The key in the door clanked and proceeded to open once unlocked.

“Mrs Aird.” She flinched at the name.

“Please…” She said holding up a shaking hand.

He felt sorry for the blonde whose hair was crinkling into natural ringlets, untamed, chaotic, and spiralling in and out of each other. “We need to bring you in for a few questions. Any information could help your case.” He said picking up the abandoned meal.

“Aren’t I entitled to a lawyer?” She said, looking up for the first time in a long time.

“This is off the record Ma’am. You can give a detailed confession with a lawyer present at some other time which will be on the record and could be used in evidence in the court of law, but right now we have to make sure our information is as accurate as possible.”

She nodded, thankful she wouldn’t be getting herself into any more shit. “How long has it been?” She asked, needing to know. Time moved slower when you were on your own, and even more so when you were worried out of your skin.

“Since when?” He asked checking his watch.

“Waterloo.” She said simply. As if she could be asking about anything else.

“Around 9 hours give or take.” He quickly calculated.

“9 hours…” She sighed. It had been too long. She should have been told something by now.

“Ma’am…” He said, stepping aside, outstretching his hand to gesture her to the door. So she stood, and he clasped a cuff around each wrist before she walked from the cell, into the well-lit hallway.

Here she was, making more decisions. She wondered if the ones from here on out could make life even worse, since their potential consequences were giving her butterflies in her stomach. However it would be more appropriate to say the butterflies felt like wasps.

She was unshackled and asked if she could sit which she did because she felt like this may take a while. He placed a cup of water in front of her and she watched droplets cling to the side of it, slowly losing grip.

“How are you feeling?” He asked, wondering if she would even be able to keep up a conversation in the _emotional_ state she was in, let alone physical what with her neck.

She blinked once. Twice. “Utterly and irrevocably… fucked over.”

 


	2. Nightmares in Disguise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovely people.
> 
> The is the first true chapter of this series as I conside the other one more of a trailer, or a teaser perhaps. 
> 
> Before reading this one please note that this is a very dark chapter with 'scenes' of a violent nature and connotations of a non consensual act. However I stress that you be reassured no unconsensual act takes place.  
> Please feel free to skip this chapter. I toyed for a long time as putting it as an archive warning however it is a very very small part in a very long story which doesn't add to the plot but does give you some understanding behind the character's motives I guess. 
> 
> You have been thoroughly warned my lovelies, i'll see you at the endof the chapter! ;)

“So, Carolyn Aird.”

“Please. It’s Carol… Ross.” The blonde said picking up her Styrofoam cup of water.

“Miss Ross, could you explain the chain of events leading to this moment? We need every detail, any possible piece of evidence.” He watched her take a lengthy sip. “You understand this case can have no loose ends I presume?”

“Yes, I understand.” She said looking at the two way mirror behind him, a small distortion in the reflection running across her face. “But before we begin, officer.”

“Oh I’m not officer, I’m actually an agent. But you can call me...” He paused momentarily, as if debating on what to say next. “Jack.”

“Before we begin Jack, may I ask… is she…” She looked down the droplets of water clinging to the sides of the cup. “Is she dead?” She said quickly looking up for a reaction. “I haven’t have any word from anyone. No one will tell me anything I’ve been sat in the dark for 9 hours.”

“Ok, please calm down Miss Ross.” She realised she had sat forward and her voice had raised in decibels.

“Just tell me whether or not she’s alive...” She sighed. “Please.” Her lip quivering this time.

“We aren’t sure. I have no confirmation but I’m sure the team are mobilising as we speak.” He answered honestly after receiving confirmation from his superiors through his ear piece. 

“They are?” Jack nodded. “And no word yet?” He shook his head. “She could be dead for all I know now.” There was no answer this time which was even more terrifying, so much so a tear trickled down her cheek. “What exactly are you holding me for?”

“We are legally allowed to detain you for 48 hours.” She could tell he was dodging around the question.

Even his posture spoke for him, telling her she was getting nothing more on this topic. “Where shall I start?”

“At the beginning.” He stated.

“At the beginning…” It was a long story. But at the beginning she would begin. “I went to NYU you know. I was going to be a buyer in the fancy furniture shop on Madison, and I was, I guess, but... I was going to _go_ places. _My_ American dream.” She chuckled to herself morbidly. “It’s funny how nightmares can disguise themselves as dream.”

 

///

 

Carol walked down the halls of the New Jersey mansion. The music pulsed through the wall around her as the heels of her stilettos echoed against the marble floors. She stopped at a dimly lit mirror, the only thing not splashed in a neon light.

She fixed her rouge lips, slipping the tube back into her inner pocket, lifting the fur coat up a little, even though it still hung off her shoulders in the crooks of her arms. She wasn’t sure what was in the pill she had taken, all she knew was that her pupils were larger than they should be.

She fixed her silk red negligee and straightened the lines in her fishnet before walking out of the front door, into the night air, away from all the screaming. Her client was nowhere to be seen and she was sick of being groped like a piece of meat by people she wasn’t being specifically hired out by.

She found her cigarette tin, searching for a lighter in the deep pockets when a flame was lit beside her, she turned to the dark haired skinny man in a deep purple suit and tight black shirt, leaning slightly towards him to allow the herb to light before leaning back.

“Thank you.” She said looking down, flicking the ash.

“No problem. What’s a pretty girl like you doing in a place like this?” He asked nonchalantly.

“There are many pretty girls in there.” She said as a few ran out, soaking and topless, dripping all over the marble stairs as they ran into an uber, a few men following, obviously moving to a more secluded party.

“Ok, let me rephrase. What is a specimen like yourself doing at this type of party, wearing that?” He said looking her up and down. She simply took a drag of her cigarette. “I mean, you look as if you would have better things to do with a Friday night than hang at this shitty parade, and I haven’t seen you around before.”

“You haven’t?” She said, letting the smoke cloud fly.

“No, and I don’t forget a face. And yours, Miss, is very out of place.” He said rather matter of factly. His face was sly, and cunning. Like a fox, reincarnated as a snake, venom leaking from his words and eye intent on dismantling others.

“Well, I was hired. However, my employer is nowhere to be found.” She said looking around, and away from the gaze that crawled over her neck like a razor scraping upon her skin.

He pushing himself off of the wall. “On the contrary. You are stood right in front of him, _Carol_.”

She looked up. “So you are the infamous Mr Tucker?”

“And you are the escort I have been waiting for all evening… Well I’m glad I didn’t sulk off to one of those bimbos. You seem worth the wait.” He said, eyes now glimmering at the depth of the grey ones. “Follow me.” He said resolutely, opening the door, leading her through the corridors, ditching his whiskey in a plant pot and his jacket on one of the waiters. “Lay down, disrobe.” He said once inside a very extravagant and lavish bedroom, which looked like it had come straight from the plaza hotel.

 _Straight down to it._ She thought sliding off her coat, checking to see if her payment had come through, which it had, before taking off her shoes and sitting on the bed. Her eyes drifted momentarily to a picture frame of her client, a woman, and a child tucked away in the corner of the photo. It seemed old, the edges of the frame worn down as if it was regularly faced down to hide from others.

He loomed towards her and it was only then she saw the gun strapped to his side. Following her eye line he took off the holster. “I’m a powerful man, Carol. I need my protection.” He slid it off and lay it aside before walking towards her once more.

In instinct she edged up the bed as he crawled towards her in a way that made her feel like prey. He neared and neared until her back hit the backboard and she had nowhere else to retreat to. She had done this many times before, but never had she felt this uncomfortable.

He leaned forward, lips slowly eliminating the distance but before they met, Carol heard a sickening click and cold metal cut into her skin. She looked to her arms to see his retreating from her wrists which were now bound with handcuffs tied to the bed.  “What do you think you’re doing?”

He crawled off of the bed, heading to the door, signalling for his guards to let no one enter. “What I like.” He said, pouring himself a neat vodka. “I paid for you for a reason and one reason only. I want someone I can ruin. I could have fucked anyone of those girls down there, but they are already wrecked.” He said watching her beginning to squirm against the restraints. The fear kind of pleased him. It was always the same.

“This isn’t what you paid for.” She said, nowhere in the criteria did it specify this.

“Stop talking.” He said throwing it back, chucking the crystal glass on the bedside table. He sat beside her slowly.

“Untie me, Mr Tuck-” The hand that once caressed her changed its actions in the blink of an eye, leaving the words stuck in her throat and a red mark across her face.

Brushing a lock of blonde hair from her face his eyes darted to the reddening of her face. “I said stop talking.” He stood once more picking up his glass, taking off his waistcoat, undoing a few of his shirt buttons.

“I want to leave. Now.” Carol said monotonously, her face still tilted down where his hand left it.

“You aren’t going anywhere.” He said, his shirt now pooling on the floor as he replaced the glass, stalking back to toy with his food. It all happened so suddenly, he seemed to pounce upon her, pinning her down. Her body rattled beneath him, caged and afraid as he ripped off her negligee, throwing it to the side like it was nothing.

Carol closed her eyes in fear. She didn’t want to see it believe it. Hear it. Smell it. Taste it. Experience it. She could barely breathe as the emotions and fear began to build and claw down her throat as she felt him edge closer to her body. She opened her mouth ready to scream when she heard his breathing stop as a sound, alien to her ears, darted past her.

Suddenly she felt a rush of warm liquid pool at her stomach and she pried her eyes open, seeing her captor clutching his chest, his face in shock as the blood poured between his fingers. Carol could now feel the splatters on her face as her mouth dropped open, seeing the dark red pour from underneath his undershirt onto her pale body, forking over her like a river on new terrain.

He looked at her in disbelief, trying to move his lips to say something but before he could he collapsed forward. She screamed as his weight fell upon her. The beating of her heart pulsing against his dying and bullet-ridden one.

She blinked the tears away screaming out, looking to the ceiling until she saw someone, head to toe in leather, holding a Glock 34 complete with a SilenceCo Octane 9 silencer and disguised with a blacked out motorbike helmet.

She glared at the biker who looked at her in curiosity. She could feel the blood pooling behind her shoulders as she stared at her own distorted reflection in the black of the visor. The biker hooked Mr Tucker under his arms before hauling his limp body off of Carol onto the floor.

He continued procedure as more men came out from hiding, taking photos of the body, going through drawers in the room as Carol laid in shock, naked and covered in blood. Fight or Flight kicked in when she saw the handcuff key that must have fallen from Mr Tucker’s pocket, only inches away.

Suddenly there was a clang in the en suite. This was her chance as all the biker’s attention was focused to the bathroom, guns raised. She managed to unclasp her wrist, wondering if she could make a run out the door before remembering Tommy’s guards stood outside.

She was trapped. The only other option was the window. Would she wait for death or take it herself?

She heard the cracking of wood as one of the figures kicked down the en suite door, to find a child, clutching its knees shivering, hiding its face as the sights of the guns were locked onto it.

They did not stand down. They stood, unsure, unmoving, looking to one another for guidance. Surely they couldn’t shoot a child.

“We know we can’t have any witnesses.” One said, her voice undoubtedly feminine.

“We didn’t sign up to murder children.” The original said.

The first one remained still for a moment before pushing the rest out of the way lifting her gun.

“WAIT!” Carol found herself shouting as her feet moved from under her. They had barely turned around by the time she had skidded past them. Her fight or flight _had_ kicked in just not in the way she expected. She held the quaking child in her arms, which judging by the photo she saw earlier she presumed was a girl, protecting her with her equally quivering body. “You can’t kill her, she’s just a child.”

She felt a boot land on her bare back but she did not budge no matter how much it hurt. The men looked to one another before one raised their boot once more. “Wait!” Another said, halting the foot in the air. “We take them to the boss. We came to do the job. This is out of our hands.”

“He’s right.” Said another. “We take them with us.”

The suspended boot hovered momentarily before it’s wearer let it drop to the ground,

Carol’s tears streamed through the gaps in her eyelashes as her eyes refused to open until she could hear the retreating of footsteps. She finally let herself breathe, even though they were shallow and shaky, remembering the child that quaked below her. “Hey,” She whispered with no response. “Hey, hey, hey.” She said again, lifting the girls head from hiding, seeing big blue eyes gaze up at her past light brown hair. “What’s your name sweetheart?” She asked worriedly.

It took a while but the girl replied. “Rindy.” She sobbed, eyes darting skittishly, finding solace in the woman’s softening face.

“Ok Rindy, I’m Carol. It’s going to be alright. Don’t worry, I’ll keep you safe. Stay close to me ok?”

Rindy seemed unsure but Carol couldn’t blame her, but it only took the sounds of footsteps and a few more silenced gunshots to reassure her. “Promise?”

“I promise.” Carol said, stroking the girl’s face, seeing it stiffen in fear once more as a biker intruded.

“Moving out.” He said grabbing Carol’s shoulder, seeing her state of undress before turning away, gesturing a team mate to hand him the fur coat before draping it around her. It all happened so fast. And before she knew it she was being thrown into the back of a white black out van, clutching the little girl, wrapping her in the fur too, unsure of her fate.

 

///

 

“I was an escort you see. And I had been assigned to a client at a party.” She explained.

“Client name?” Jack said, his ear piece lighting up again.

“Mr Tucker.” She said, seeing his face twitch a little. She had obviously struck a chord. “He tried to force himself upon me, and just as I was about to scream out unsuccessfully for help, he was shot and killed right before my very eyes… That’s when I first met Rindy. I managed to break free, when they found her. I begged for them to let us live.”

She felt her hands shaking and the agent slid another cup of water to her. “Carry on.”

She accepted it. “They decided they would be merciful, as killing children wasn’t in the job description… I thought it could only get better, that I could have lived. I should have jumped when I had the chance. I didn’t know they were bringing me to him.”

“To who?” He asked, now intrigued.

She scoffed, draining her water once more, wiping the edge of her mouth before looking back to Jack. “To the reason I’m in this fucking room, talking to you. To Harge of course.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're off to see the douche bag himself! 
> 
> Any thoughtson this Carol?
> 
> Come talk to me below! ;)


	3. Red Rain

“You were then taken to see Hargess Aird.”

Her eyes fluttered close at the sound of his name as she tried to regulate her breathing. “Yes.”

“And then?”

They opened, finding themselves in the mirror behind Jack’s head. “And then… hell began and never truly stopped.”

 

///

 

Carol sat in the pristine white chair, red blood dripping down her leg, staining the pure carpets as she clutched the child to her chest.

He appeared. Sitting behind his desk he sighed. “My name is Hargess Aird, but please call me Harge.” He was greeted by silence and a cold icy stare from the confines of a fur coat and blonde hair. It gave him shivers. It happened for him in an instant. “I said call me Harge.”

“Hello Harge.” Carol relented.

Now that he had heard her voice his plan was locked down. “Now, someone told me that after nearly being assaulted, chained and over powered, you managed unchain yourself to save this little girl’s life… covered in blood, naked, vulnerable.” He saw the grey eyes divert. “It’s admirable.” He admitted.

They were back on him like a shot. “Admirable?” She said, voice cracking in hurt and shock.

“Very. Women as strong as you… Look at you.” He said gesturing to her. “Here you are sat in the blood of another, leaving a trail wherever you go. Aren’t you itching to get it off of you?” She looked down at herself to the little girl who was staining red herself. She had been in such shock, the stickiness of it drying to her had become subconscious. “You see? Strong. I like strong.”

“Does this mean we get to live?” She asked, the only question playing in her mind.

He pushed himself off the desk, picking up an apple, offering it to Carol but she shook her head. He tried to prod the child but she clutched Rindy closer. Finally he took a bite himself. “You know, I don’t like death. So messy, inhumane. Awful really, but it is part of our life cycle. But it has come to my attention, that today, Mr Tucker’s death came rather swiftly. Surprising isn’t it - but it got me thinking.”

Carol sensed that this man thinking too hard was a dangerous thing. “What?”

He took another bite, walking behind his desk. “I’m about to offer you a job and you either take it or I kill you, and then depending on how much she screams, I will kill her or ship her to Russia.” He said pulling a gun from a drawer, watching Carol push back into her chair as he perched on his desk once more as if nothing had changed.

“A job?” She asked before swallowing hard.

“I want to hire you permanently. As an escort. You keep the child.” He said nodding to Rindy. “We’ll sort the paperwork. Get you a fancy new apartment, a day job anywhere you like. She will go to a good school. Name it you’ll have it. As long as it is in New York of course.”

“And what? All of this because you want to fuck me?” Even this seemed a little farfetched, Harge seemed like the type of man who could get whatever he wanted whenever he wanted.

“Oh, no.” He scoffed. “I have other people for that, no. I want to marry you.” He said simply.

She blinked once, twice. “Excuse me?”

“The most powerful contract of them all.” He grinned, taking one last bite of his apple before tossing it in the bin. “I like contracts, very… binding, unbreakable.” _Imprisoning._

“Marry you? That’s it and then we get to walk away?” It was insane. She could see no reason why he would want to marry her. But it didn’t matter. She knew she would accept. Because it seemed not only to be her life on the line but Rindy’s.

Harge swiftly pulled out a handkerchief from his suit trouser pocket, dabbing the corners of his mouth before nearing Carol like one would a wounded animal. He dabbed at the blood on her face, watching her flinch each time but slowly cleaning her up. “Not quite.” He grinned.

 

///

 

“You would seduce and lure, they would kill.” Jack filled in.

“No… It didn’t happen like that. I was given a tracker or a bug. All I had to do was put it on their person or in the apartment. Sometimes this required getting a little closer to them. Other times it was just a pass by.” She said looking at her ring finger, she could still feel wear the diamonds would nick her other finer sometimes with clean stinging cuts. “I didn’t know…” Carol looked up, her eyes stinging with tears.

“You didn’t know what?”

“I know that I should have. But I was ignorant. It was a life or death situation. I didn’t know what happened after I left… I swear it…”

 

///

 

“Here you go.” Fred, as she learnt to be one of Harge’s biker’s name, opened the door to a fully furnished penthouse apartment. “Everything is here. Food will be delivered in the afternoon and once a week until Mr Aird begins paying you monthly. Clothes will arrive with the food as well as a shopping allowance, so make sure the ones you’re wearing now are ready to go by the time the food gets here. We will deal with them.”

“Ok.” Carol said with Rindy stood in front of her, gazing around the apartment, Carol’s hand splayed on Rindy’s chest protectively.

“And, I’m sure you already know this but err… I … please don’t do anything stupid.  Take it from me, there are teams of us based on every corner of this city.” He said as warmly as he could, but it was hard to be warm when you had killed in front of the person you were trying to be warm to.

She looked at his meagre smile. _How could he do what he does?_ He didn’t look like a killer, he looked like someone who should work in an office filing file after file. _Perhaps it is the most unassuming that can be the most deadly._ “I won’t do anything stupid.” Carol reassured.

“Ok, well goodbye. Bye Rindy.” The small brunette didn’t even register him. He saw he would not be receiving an answer and therefore left, leaving the key on the side.

Rindy and Carol simply looked around the apartment. It must have been close to 6am. Carol was exhausted, and so was Rindy but the adrenaline was keeping them both alert even though it had been hours since they had met, the past few being spent signing paper work, fake ID’s, and scrubbing their past lives from the face of the earth. The sun was beginning to light the apartment.

The blonde retracted her hand to rest it on the little girl’s shoulder but she felt small hands clutch it, smearing the drying red upon her skin. “It’s ok… we’re safe now.” Carol said hugging the little girl towards her. Somehow having to be strong for someone else was forcing her to be strong for herself too. She was sure if she was alone she would have been a mess on the floor. “You’re safe, it’s alright.” The words flew from her mouth even though she knew they weren’t exactly true.  

She knelt, turning the girl towards herself, tilting her head up. The innocent skin was purged with red from being kept so close to Carol’s body. She brushed Rindy’s cheek with her thumb. “Let’s go get washed.” She said, scared that if she stared at Rindy much longer she would break down because she only saw her own terrified self, staring back.

They made their way to the bathroom, and stood looking at the shower hand in hand, Rindy rubbing her eyes that were sore from crying. Carol managed to work out how to turn on the rain shower before turning to the girl.

“Ok, you go first alright.” She said but the girl shook her head. “Rindy we have to wash this off of us.” She stressed, gesturing to her bloody hands, it was slowly getting to her, the sight of it scarring its way into her brain along with the image of it soaking into Mr Tucker’s shirt as he clutched his chest.

The little girl buried her head in the blonde’s stomach, her small puffs of breath being felt upon Carol’s skin. “You want me to get in with you?” She felt the girl nod, her face not looking up from the comfort of Carol’s warmth. Carol looked to their conjoined hands and the way the brunette clutched at her. Rindy really did need her. Or did she need Rindy?

Carol had thought about motherhood. Not for long because she would usually dwell on how such thing wasn’t possible for her at this point in her life. Or ever really. But now it seemed she had it. Harge was talking of getting Rindy’s new identity, as their child.

She wasn’t scared of having a child, maybe just letting her down, scared of not being enough for Rindy. She had been found locked in a bathroom while her mother had overdosed downstairs, as Fred had whispered to Carol on the way, and her father was assassinated. Who knew what else Rindy had been through? _Was this perhaps the normal for her?_

Carol went to let go of her hand to take off her robe only to have Rindy’s grip tighten. “Sweetheart.” She said kneeling to Rindy’s height, catching her eye line which was more often than not directed at the floor. “I have to take off my clothes, and so do you. We need to get rid of these, ok?”

Rindy mustn’t have been any older than six or seven judging by her height. She looked to her saviour and nodded reluctantly, and for the first time that night they lost physical contact, but as soon as Carol had shedded her coat and helped Rindy pull off her own they were holding hands again.

Carol lead them into the shower feeling the hot spray against her skin, seeing the red pool at her feet and slip down the drain, the remnants of a man probably never to be seen again.

She used the amenities she could find on the both of them, rinsing them down together, Rindy hugging her waist as Carol scrubbed her hair with shampoo and then her own, turning the white bubbles pink before washing them out.

Once they were both clean, all traces of Mr Tucker off of them they simply sat in the corner of the shower, Rindy sat sideways on Carol’s crossed legs playing with the blonde’s fingers as the water rained upon their cleansed skin.

The steam kept them warm as the spray pattered against Carol’s right foot and the lower half of Rindy’s legs. “Are Tom and Darla going to come and… are they going to come and get me?” It was the first thing Rindy had said since the mansion.

Carol connected the dots, Thomas was the first name of her deceased client, so she presumed Darla was the name of her mother. It was odd to Carol that she hadn’t called them mum and dad. Perhaps they weren’t ‘mum and dad’ to Rindy. Just Tom and Darla. She thought momentarily on what to say, pushing the sopping hair behind Rindy’s ear. “I… I don’t think so sweetheart. I’m so sorry.” She said kissing the little girl’s head.

“Are you… are you going to leave me too?” Rindy asked, looking up at Carol, cradled in her arms.

“No… No I’m not.” She said, truthfully. A lot had changed in the past 12 hours. She had changed, more than she thought she would in a lifetime. She had been restrained, assaulted, witness to a murder, covered in blood, had a gun pointed at her, thrown herself in front of a gun, begged for her life, thrown in a van, kidnapped, betrothed, given a job, a child and an apartment in the shortest space of time imaginable.

And the only thing that kept her from collapsing into self-pity and depression was the little girl who let her sleepy head rest upon her naked chest as the shower washed away the memories, and left the scars clean and fresh.

 

///

 

“Then what happened?” Jack urged.

“What happened? What didn’t?” She smiled solemnly.

“Tell me about Abby Gerhard.”

 

///

 

“Hello?” Carol said tentatively, walking into the very lavish furniture shop. She had dreamed of working in a place like this her entire life – excluding the last month where she and Rindy had spent most of the time in each other’s arms on the sofa, in bed, or in the shower. The shower was quickly becoming Rindy’s favourite place. They would shower together before bed. They were inseparable. That was until Harge rang round with Carol’s job placement to start in four weeks’ time and Rindy’s school placement.

Carol had to practice making Rindy and herself a little less inseparable. It began with small things, like Carol leaving to cook in the kitchen while telling Rindy to stay and watch TV. It had failed the first few times but by week two it was ok. Next was Rindy doing her teeth on her own. Going to the toilet without Carol stood with her or outside.

Once she had gotten around to getting the girl to try on uniform she had to break the news to her about school. Rindy had never been to school before. She had always been home schooled. She was very smart for a girl her age Carol soon came to find once Rindy began to talk a little more which still wasn’t very much.

She was also very damaged. Drug dealing father, drug abusing mother, it lead to a deadly cocktail of lots of money, dangerous people and neglect. She would often spend her nights at parties sat in a locked bathroom until her parents let her out the next afternoon or whenever they would remember about her.

Carol had listened, she had cried, not that she let Rindy see. She had pulled the girl into her embrace to watch another movie, only to silently cry behind her. They had run over their cover stories time and time again, however, it couldn’t conceal Carol’s immense worry. Letting Rindy go at school today was tough on both of them, there had been tears on both ends, but she only had 6 hours before she could leave and be back at the gates to greet her.

She wasn’t sure how Harge got her this job but she was sure he had his ways. “Hello.” An unfamiliar voice said. “You must be Carolyn Aird.” Oh there was that, the certificate that had come through the post which had come with her new name, new birth certificate, golden flashy diamond ring that would cut into her pinky and middle finger, and status. She was no longer a Miss but a Mrs. “Abigail Gerhard. But please call me Abby.”

“Call me Carol, Abby.” There was a short awkward silence.

“Would you like a coffee?” Abby said pointing to the break room. If Abby wasn’t as straight as a roundabout then maybe she would have stood a chance in this scenario.

“I would love one.” Carol smiled, hoping she may be able to find a friend in Abby. She couldn’t remember the last time she had friends. Surprisingly she didn’t want to spend too much unpaid time with the people that hired her.

“Great because we have a new coffee machine and I have been dying to use it but I have no idea how the bloody thing works.” She scoffed. They arrived at the machine that looked like it had been pulled straight from a barista.

Carol had worked in a small coffee shop when she was younger, creating art on top of the mugs with cocoa clouds, but was amused none the less as Abby pulled random levers.

“Wait…” She said catching Abby’s hand before it would release the steam. She pulled a couple of levers, spun a few nobs and poured in some coffee beans but got a little muddled. Apparently this was Abby’s cue to begin hitting it in random places. “Stop. Stop hitting it!” She laughed, it had been a while since she had done that.

“Why? It works well enough with the vending machine.” The auburn winked.

She landed another smack on the machine. “Abigail.” The blonde said sternly.

“Known me two minutes and you’re already using the full name on me? That’s ballsy Aird.” She said arching an eyebrow.

It took Carol a little by surprise, that being her nickname, a name that wasn’t even hers, but the blonde rolled her eyes managing to stumble her way through the rest of it. “There. Done. One Cappuccino.” She said, handing the steaming cup the auburn.

“I wanted a latte.” She laughed.

“Exactly. One Cappuccino.” Carol winked.

 

///

 

“And the relationship between yourself and Abby. It became physical.”

“Yes.” Carol responded simply, thinking back to the time when Abby had first kissed her by that coffee machine in that same break room. “It wasn’t hard to fall in love with Abby. She was the first true friend I think I’ve had in this world. Kindness can take you far. But things… change.”

“Harge became aware.” Jack said believing that was the change.

He was partly. “Aware and enraged. If he couldn’t have me I couldn’t have anyone. Abby was a threat to him, because she was a possibility for me to a better life. So I let her go. We stayed friends though.”

“Do you still love her?”

“Not in the way one would need to love to sustain a relationship. We would never have worked out. We were too similar, both stubborn, both headstrong. It would have crashed one way or another, but it did so prematurely, thanks to Harge. He took away my second love.”

“Who was your first?” Jack frowned.

“Rindy of course. And Abby knew that. Which is what made her such an amazing friend. It still is what makes her so phenomenal. Our similarities as people helped Rindy. She began to thrive at school after the initial reluctance and numerous calls to the principal’s office...” Carol chuckled a little, remembering the way her heart would clench whenever the school called only to find out that she had punched a boy in the playground or screamed at a teacher on a particularly bad day.

She had decided to keep Rindy home on one of her bad days. They had sat on the couch curled up together, making each other happy again, with little things like doing some drawings, brushing each other’s hair, cooking, counting. Rindy loved to count, she would do it subconsciously, a habit from spending time alone Carol guessed.

“She warmed to Abby, but was wary at first, she always is. Well nearly always.” Carol said thinking of the exception of herself. It was one of those ‘bad days’ that Abby had come by to check on them. At first Rindy wouldn’t let go of Carol. Abby was trying too hard, but it seemed to suddenly click when she climbed off the couch to play with the trainset by herself. Rindy had uncurled herself from Carol’s lap and silently sat down to play with Abby.

“Abby would take care of-“

“She would take care of Rindy when I went to… to work for Harge.” Her eyes found an empty space on the wall. “I still remember the first time. I was so scared. I was a different person than I had been five months prior.” She looked back to Jack. “You see they wanted me to get settled in the new life they had given me. So settled, I almost forgot what it had cost me. Almost.”

“And what was that?” He asked seeing a slight change in Carol’s gaze.

“My freedom.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the plot thickens and still... no Therese Belivet?


	4. Pinballs

“Do you know any of the names of the victims that have been killed?” Jack asked clicking his pen. She shook her head.

“Look, all I did was plant trackers… I didn’t know what he was using them for. Some may still be alive.”

Jack huffed, rephrasing his question. “Do you know the names of the people you planted trackers on for your husband?

“Please don’t call him that.” Jack nodded in understanding. “Cyrus Harrison. Then Jerry Rix. Then the bartender from the Ritz…. This is what you want? The names of the people I presume are dead now.”

“Look we can guarantee your protection, legal and physical if we receive all the names you know. All the people that have died or disappeared under Hargess Aird. We only have a few. We built this case off the bare minimum that the law would allow. I need something to bring to my superiors. And you need something to protect yourself with.”

“I remember. Every single one of them he would have me meet. All their faces. All their desires. All their names.”

“What happened to Cy?”

 

///

 

Carol stood in the gallery event. She had been given a fact file on Mr Harrison earlier in the day, along with $4000 for a dress and a fake ID. _Another one, what’s real anymore? I could be anyone_.

She had bought a dress, studied her homework after being allowed a day off, and organised Abby to babysit that evening. She now stood in front of Cy Harrison’s favourite painting, waiting patiently. “It’s a forgery you know.” She heard a voice say and low and behold it was the devil himself. She had donned a longer ginger wig knowing that was his preference.

“Surely not.” She said gesturing to it with one hand as the other graced the champagne flute.

“It is, you see the very specific constellation?” He said pointing to the dark swirling skies. “That star right there, it doesn’t exist, never has done.”

“Maybe he made a mistake?” Carol suggested seeing his face smirk, believing she didn’t know much about art. “Or perhaps he thought the night sky was a little lacking.”

“Making it real?” He said smugly.

“Exactly.” Carol said taking another sip of her champagne, wiping off her lipstick print from the glass. Not one trace could be left.

“Still a fake.” He said, nose held high.

“How do you know?” She asked knowing exactly how he knew.

“Because I own the real one.” It was a dangerous game forgery. A dangerous game with a lot of money on the line. And where there was a lot of money usually came trouble.

“You don’t…” She said in surprise. Giggling like a school girl who had just met a celebrity. “I don’t suppose I could see it… could I?” She said eyes wide and wondering, innocently blinking like a deer, staring at a shooter, only the shooter was unaware that his gun had no trigger, not that it mattered, he was too busy staring down the sight, dreaming of the kill.

“Of course.” Hook. Line and sinker.

It wasn’t far to his apartment. Carol saw no signs of anyone in the apartment. They viewed the painting for a little while, his hand urging her closer, making calculated moves on her. She had seen this tactic used on younger girls in bars. But it was proving a distraction for him as she caressed the painting’s frame, planting her bug.

“You know, I’m just going to go to the bathroom. But that balcony view looks amazing. How about we have some wine, look at the correct star constellations maybe… make our own art?”

They were the words she knew he wanted to hear. “Deal.” He said with a tooth grin as she leant forward dodging his lips at the last moment to kiss him on the cheek, her hand slipping into his pocket to place her tracker.

Carol smiled, slipping from his grasp rather happily, heading to the bathroom, planting one more in the door way of the bedroom, taking a wrong turn and leaving through a back exit.

 

///

 

“And did most happen this way...?”

“Yes. I was in and out. Some took… longer. I would put a tracker on them, slip a bug maybe. It wasn’t illegal, I was being allowed a life, a good life to do it. I thought they might have been keeping tabs on clients. I… You have to believe me when I tell you that I didn’t know what... I didn’t know that Harge was killing them. And I wasn’t going to ask.”

“So when did you find out?”

“When he asked me to take this little arrangement further.”

 

///

 

“Hey, I’ve come to pick up Rindy.” Carol said walking to the school gate excited to see her daughter. “Sorry the furniture store was packed. Am I late? Is she drawing somewhere?” Rindy was always drawing.

“Mrs Aird?” Said the perplexed teacher. “I think you must be confused, your husband picked Rindy up today.”

Carol’s stomach dropped. “My _husband_?”

“Mr Aird.” She said smiling. “I know, I found it quite shocking to, but our loved ones do surprise us sometimes. He said you were all off for ice cream at Bennie’s?”

 _Fuck._ “Yes, I remember now. Thank you. Bennie’s. It totally slipped my mind. I must get going. See you tomorrow!”

Carol couldn’t remember how many reds she must have sped through to get to Bennie’s. Harge was sat inside guzzling his ice cream as Rindy sat like still life, frozen to the spot as her rainbow sundae melted down the sides. “Rindy!” She sighed with relief as the little girl ran to her.

They embraced tightly before the blonde checked her over thoroughly. “She’s ok, wife. Do I get such a greeting?” He said with a smug smile.

Carol was still as a rock as he kissed her on the cheek, her diverted gaze finding four of his biker men ‘amicably’ eating ice cream too. “What the hell do you think you are doing, Harge?” She hissed, sitting Rindy back down.

“Taking our daughter out for ice cream of course. I hear from her teachers she’s doing well-“

“She is _not_ your daughter Harge.” She said through gritted teeth.

“That’s not what her birth certificate says.” He said just as gritty, changing the topic quickly. “Anyway, she hasn’t even touched it.” Carol rolled her eyes, taking away the sugar monstrosity and replacing it with vanilla ice cream in a simple tub. The girl tucked in. “Vanilla? Seriously? She _really_ isn’t my daughter.”

“What do you want? Why are you here? I did the jobs as asked every single time without fail.”

“I know, you’re perfect at it. The best.” It was true. Unfortunately for Carol, his presence had become more and more regular. Little did she know, it was because Harge had a soft spot for her. Call it love.

“Then what?” She snapped. He was still trying to get her to come around but he had time.

“I have a special assignment, honey. And you aren’t going to like it. So it would be kind of you to remember that I have legal rights over our precious daughter, your entire life on puppet strings, also your head on a spit twirling-“

“Get to the point.” She said rubbing her daughter’s back softly as she ate.

“Therese Belivet.” He said, looking at her for any sort of reaction. “Part time bar waitress, part time Photographer.”

“Sounds like a dream.” She said emotionlessly

“Some of her work will soon be hanging in ‘SOHO’, some sort of hip new gallery.”

“I’ve heard of the gallery. Looks interesting.”

“Well, in one of these shots there’s a very incriminating piece of evidence. A man, whose alibi is compromised by being in that photo.” He said looking rather squirmy.

“Alibi for what?” She didn’t know why she bothered in asking. He never told her.

“It doesn’t matter. The fact is it’s hung in a gallery less than three blocks from a police station. We need the negatives destroyed. And the art changed. It’s due to be promoted in two months.”

“What do you need? A tracking device, a bug? Is she even gay?” Carol said exasperatedly.

“I don’t know, I don’t care but I need someone to infiltrate this girl’s life.”

“Which is where I step in?” She asked raising her brow.

“She needs a girlfriend experience. Someone to trust. Someone to listen to. To have access to the negatives. To get into her head. I need… I need you to do what you do.”

“And you’re ok with me sleeping with another woman? Because you weren’t alright the last time.” She said recalling the past, watching him stiffen.

“Well, I’ve matured since then and I’m pretty sure you won’t be making secret savings accounts with this woman, will you?” The savings account, her slim hope gone. All of it.

She sighed. “No, I won’t.”

“Good.” Harge went back to tucking into his ice cream looking round like a little boy. “So, how was work?”

 

///

 

“A little different from the last?”

“Yes, I didn’t realise how different Therese would be. As a person and as a job.” Carol said distantly. “I’ve always been confident. I’m a great believer in first impression. Lord knows what she thought of mine.”

“Where did you first meet?” He asked, leaning back in his chair.

“It was the end of October… the 23rd actually. I had been given my fact file. Everything I would need to know about her. I went into the bar she worked at. And…”

“And…”

“I had never, ever, seen anyone so beautiful. So just. So pure. The complete opposite of myself.”

 

///

 

Carol strolled down the frost sidewalk, that afternoon, consciously listening to the hustle of the city and the conversations that whirred past her but at the back of her mind, she was relaying over her plan.

Therese Belivet. Born in Prague, Czech Republic. Came over with her mother to America and abandoned at an orphanage. Spent her life in the system. Worked numerous jobs her entire life. Is 26 years old, a photographer, artist and musician.

It was a pretty impressive resume, she must admit. To go from an orphan with nothing to manage to live stably in New York of all places. All she needed to do now was meet her.

Carol removed her scarlet red scarf and tussled her hair a little as she entered the bar, her grey eyes which colour matched her trousers and blouse, darted around the bar, looking out for a small brunette but failing to see anyone.

Instead she decided to take a look around, there was soft jazz music coming from a live band. The smooth jazz filled the warm glowing room, giving her a sense of odd nostalgia, the deep woods glimmering in the gold light accompanied by the dark wooden walls and bar made the place feel so intimate.

“Hi, my name’s James, welcome to McKinley’s. Are you wanting a table?”

“No, I’m just in here for a drink.” Carol answered inspecting the décor.

“Okay then, well the bar lines the room, so I’ll leave you to it.” He wandered off going into the kitchen to leave the two of them to approach the bar and sit on a stool to face the band.

She directed her attention back to the band but after a while of searching but Carol became restless, purely for the fact that she couldn’t seem to see the waitress anywhere.

The smooth jazz was soothing her nerves although one would not be able to tell she was nervous at all. She was positively cool on the outside. However, time ticked on, and she became restless. “Who do I have to sleep with to get a drink around here?” She muttered to herself

“That would be me.” A foreign voice said, causing Carol to twist round, her blonde curls haloing her shocked face, as her grey eyes met the most stunning pair of emerald green. The scent of her perfume hit Therese like a tidal wave, the deep rich addictive smell now associating Carol with itself in Therese’s mind.

The blonde knew the stranger immediately, it was her, and she was everything expected but so much more. There was something she didn’t anticipate, the way the brunette seemed to be wrapped up in her too, their eyes, throwing around electric sparks wildly, making a blush crawl up Therese’s neck and a sense of displacement to bubble up inside Carol.

“Would it?” Carol asked, her gaze transfixed.

“B-But because I’m kind I’ll suffice with cash or card…” Therese said.

“Although if you _did_ accept my offer of sex as a method of payment, I would sure hope to get more than a dry martini with an olive.”

Therese diverted her gaze, remembering she had a job to do, blushing even more when she heard the blonde’s joke, smiling a little as the grey eyes followed her movement behind the bar. Therese’s hairs on the back of her neck stood on end as she felt as if her body was under scrutiny. “Oh I’m sure… But as the place is a little full, we should probably leave that to another time, don’t you think?” Therese said. The blonde’s mouth ran dry.

“Of course. Wouldn’t want to upstage the band now, would we?” It was like honey dripping over her lips, puddling until it made contact with the brunette. The banter back and forth like an alternating current.

“A dry martini with an olive then.” Carol nodded in confirmation.

“Therese…” The blonde said reading the brunette’s label, watching the bartender’s movement’s halt.

“Now it only seems fair that I now know your name.” The brunette said, her hand stretching past the taps, extending her hand.

“Carol.” The blonde said taking it in her own, her index finger resting over the brunette’s pulse point. It was more or less thumping against the pad of her finger.

 “So,” Therese started, reluctantly allowing her hand to slip from the blonde’s, mixing the drinks. “I haven’t see you in here before.” She turned to face Carol. “I would have remembered.”

“This is my first time in here you’re right… I felt like a change, let’s say.” The blonde said, watching the brunette shake her drink. Therese smiled pouring the transparent liquid into a martini glass. Leaning to fetch some cocktail sticks. “And what do you do, outside of the confines of this bar?”

“I take photos. I’m a photographer. Or trying to be anyway.” She sighed sliding the glass by its base across the bar. “Dry martini with an olive.” Carol held up her debit card and the brunette understood, finding the card machine and holding it out.

Carol place her hand over the brunette’s as she slid her card into the slot, waiting for it to process, never letting go. Her hold tightened as she punched in her pin before the transaction finalised, pulling out her card.

“I don’t know, my first payment method sounded intriguing.” She said, putting her card back in her purse without breaking eye contact.

“Well,” Therese thought momentarily, she didn’t particularly feel like leaving this conversation quite yet, she wasn’t sure if she could. “You could always ask for another drink.”

“You know I do fancy another one.” Carol replied registering the slight shock and nervousness on the brunette’s face.

“Oh?” Therese asked, flush crawling up her chest, past her collar.

“Yes, on Sunday. A latte. At 4pm, Scottie’s. But I don’t suppose you would like to join me, would you?” Carol said, her leather gloved fingers dancing around the stem of the glass before lifting it to her lips.

“Yes, yes I would.” She answered without hesitation, completely enraptured by the way the vermouth coated Carol’s lipstick as she drank, lowering the glass to the bar with a perfect crimson lip print.

“Well…” Carol said, tearing her gaze from the drink. “Do you have a pen?” She asked, expecting the scenario to continue, for the brunette to hastily pull on from her apron.

She was wrong. “Sunday, latte’s, 4 O’clock. Scottie’s.” Therese said almost mechanically, hands squeezing her side of the bar.

“Receptive.” Carol complimented, bringing the glass to her lips once more to drain it.

“Something makes me think I don’t want to miss it.” She said, her contemplation over Carol’s features only broken by the wave of another hand, calling for her presence.

Carol lay down her empty glass allowing the brunette to take it. “Goodbye, Therese.” She said catching the retreating hand that was removing the martini glass. She held out her thumb and swiped away the lipstick print, the evidence she was ever here, releasing the bartender’s hand.

“Goodbye, Carol.” She said as the blonde got down from her stool, looking back once before she left through the door.

Later Therese turned on the cold tap, splashing her overheating face with a burst of cold water. “Belivet, you ok?” She heard from a co-worker as she looked up into the mirror.

“Never better, Richard.” She said twisting the stream off, unaware that somewhere else in the city, the blonde with whom she had just interacted with was sat fully clothed in a freezing cold shower, not trying to wash away the hot flush from their brief contact but the surge of feelings she had never felt before, along with the pain they would surely bring.


	5. Virtual Waters

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got myself a 'Carol' poster and now I am one happy lass :)

“So that was the first time you had contact with her. Never before?” Jack clarified.

“No, somehow, I had never seen her before. Maybe I had sensed her across a street but never seen…” She said shaking her head.

“And you met at the coffee shop that weekend?”

She smirked at the question. Sighing to the heavens. “Yes, but you know that, don’t you?”

 

///

 

“I’m so sorry I’m late. I wondered if perhaps you had left by the time I got here.” Carol said sitting down briskly, putting her umbrella down next to her, allowing it to drip onto the floor.

“Not to worry, I got us lattes in the meantime. Careful it’s hot…” She watched the blonde, mesmerised by the way she blew upon the steaming liquid.

“What?” Carol asked, catching her gaze.

“Oh nothing, just thinking.” Therese said nursing her drink, picking up one of the side wafers.

Carol slid off her long crimson coat, rolling her shoulders. She wore an off the shoulder tight black top with white cigarette trousers. “What are you thinking? Care to share?”

Currently she was pondering the contours of Carol’s collarbones, but she decided to bypass that thought. “I’m trying to think of why you asked me out to coffee.”

The blonde reached for one of Therese’s wafers, dipping it in her coffee. “Then ask.” She said biting into the softening biscuit.

“Why did you invite me out to coffee today?” Therese said doing as she was told.

“Because…” _Because, I have to seduce you, earn your trust, and destroy those negatives._ “I thought you were so… strange.” It wasn’t a lie.

“How so?” Therese asked perplexed, it wasn’t the answer she was expecting.

“Flung out of space.” It seemed to answer and leave the question hanging. “I… I asked you to coffee in an effort to get to know you perhaps, plus coffee is always a good first… date.” Carol said, her fingers playing with the sides of her cup before looking up.

“ _Date_ , so that’s what this is?” Therese said gesturing to their situation.

Carol shifted her legs, her foot landing advertently unintentionally in between Therese’s, their feet pressing together. “If it isn’t too presumptuous to say.”

“No, it’s not.” Therese replied, her leg also moving to allow their ankles to touch too, an entirely different conversation just below them

“You aren’t going to run from me in fear?” The grey eyes narrowed.

Therese pulled the cup from her lips, her tongue slipping from its cave to swipe away the froth on her upper lip, shyly raising her hand which a teaspoon dangled from, a poor cover against the eyes following her every movement. “No, I don’t think so.” She said her hand returning to the saucer.

“Ok.” A small smile graced Carol’s lips which was mirrored by the brunette. “Now that that’s out of the way, how about you tell me about yourself?” The blonde urged.

“Is there anything you really _want_ to know?” Therese never answered like Carol expected her to. She didn’t think like other people.

“Is there anything _you_ really want to know?” Carol said turning the focus around. Her date nodded. “Like what?”

“Why you seem to have walked into my life at such a time? What you see in me? Why you make me so nervous?” She said with no delay but you could see that she had meant to hold her tongue a little while longer.

“I don’t intend to make you nervous.” Carol said truthfully. However, she thought upon her response and pondered if she may have been lying.

“But you do.” It was true, there was this kind of nervousness when being seduced, you needed to assert your intentions, which is what she was doing.

“I just wanted a martini,” She lied again. “I was lucky enough to have you to hand it to me. I really didn’t know I had walked in on such an awful time.” She still had one more question to answer which was made apparent by the fact Therese waited silently for her to speak once more. “And I see, opportunity in you.”

“An opportunity to what?” Therese asked, curiously.

A question Carol couldn’t control the answer to because she really didn’t know. “What time in your life have I walked in on?” She asked instead.

The change didn’t go unnoticed. “Ok… In one where everything hit rock bottom only to turn a new leaf. I have some art in a gallery, I have my temporary contract now a part time permanent one. You seem to just be another thing which is too good to be true.”

“Unfortunately for you I’m real.” She winked lighting a smile in the other woman. A smile so genuine accompanied with laughter, it was like watching art. “They do say good things come in threes.”

“What’s the catch?” Therese said eyes narrowing as if trying to catch her out.

“The catch?” _I’m a married escort with an adopted daughter and a husband who wants your work gone to save his own skin._ “I don’t know, I’m rather difficult to talk to, I guess.”

Therese smirked. “Something tells me that won’t be a problem.” The conversation carried on with ease, duelling back and forth until one relented.

It wasn’t long before the coffee was simply foam clinging onto an empty cup, and they had decided to go and check out Therese’s art at Carol’s request.

They had left taking a look at the pouring rain, and excuse to huddle close under the umbrella, Carol’s arm hooking in the brunette’s and Therese’s icy fingers lacing between hers. “So this is the gallery? SOHO.” Carol asked, tilting the brolly back a little to see the sign.

“Yes, c’mon let’s get out of this rain.” Therese said pulling her around the building and to the back. 1952 - The code Carol memorised. They entered the storage room after dragging Carol out of the rain.

The blonde peered at her surroundings, hundreds of paintings were either wrapped for storage or shipping, some canvases ready to go up, some disregarded like rubbish. “Where are yours?” Carol asked creating spirals with her wet footsteps as she gazed at art that stared back at her.

“Over here.” Therese whispered, taking Carol’s hand and pulling her through the labyrinth. They approached a wall where pieces ready to go out hung, Therese’s in a cluster high in the corner.

It was the same woman in each shot. The first of her inhaling a cigarette, the second, third and fourth walking through the city with different people following her each time, the fifth of her topless, pressed against a wall in an alley way, holding her breath and the sixth of her facing the camera once more, exhaling the smoke. “Wow, they really tell a story.” Carol studied them as Therese studied her. “A girlfriend perhaps?” She couldn’t help but ask.

“A model, I’ve never had a girlfriend before.” Therese admitted, her eyes not wandering from the art.

“No?” Carol asked looking to her. “Then why agree to go on this date with me?” She knew she shouldn’t be questioning the brunette’s motives especially when they swung in her favour but she couldn’t help it.

Therese looked to the floor and then the blonde, unblinking she said. “You’re different.” As if that explained it all.

“How so?” The blonde was quick to ask.

“I can’t explain it…” With no other choice but to be satisfied with that answer, Carol went back to analysing each shot, why they were chosen, what they represented, how the city tied into it all, how it all happened in one breath, just like the model. “They aren’t on sale yet but apparently we’ve had a few calls in on this one.” Therese said after an elongated silence, pointing to one of the ones of her walking through the city. Carol knew this was the negative she would have to destroy, the photo that would be burnt from history.

“I see.” She said literally seeing one of Harge’s workers in the background of the third photo, crossing the road.

Suddenly she felt an arm on her upper arm, signalling for her to turn. “I know, we’ve only just met and this might seem a little sudden but, would you…” Therese asked a little apprehensively as if warring with herself on whether to ask or not.

“Would I…?” She tried to help.

“Would you let me photograph you sometime?” If Carol wasn’t watching her lips intently then she may have missed the speech that sped by.

She allowed the silence to settle, maybe to see if Therese would take it back, but she didn’t, she stood obediently, awaiting an answer, trying to stand her ground as the blonde took a step towards her. “Give me a date and time.” She felt the breath Therese had been holding wash over her as she answered with the address of her apartment/studio and Friday at 6 O’clock. “Anything I should wear?”

Therese squirmed momentarily, wanting to say something entirely inappropriate but kept professional. “No, I have a wardrobe.”

“Not yours I hope, not that I don’t like the way you dress, but something tells me it might come up a little short on me.” She said earning another laugh. She wanted to record it. Play it on a loop. She couldn’t explain it.

“Not mine no.” Therese reassured.

“Well invite me round.” Therese didn’t answer but smiled before pulling Carol round other parts of the catacombs admiring other pieces in dim lighting.

They studied some, fought over others, laughed when they had absolutely no idea what the artist was hoping to achieve and smiled when they saw something that related to them. “You know, they’ve put in a new installation in the gallery. Want to go check it out?” Therese suggested, secretly loving that their fingers were still entwined and the way Carol would point to features on some art pieces with both their hands.

“In the gallery?” She asked. “Isn’t that breaking in, or trespassing. Are we even meant to be here?”

“Well it’s closing up soon. And we should live a little! Don’t tell me you haven’t done anything illegal in your life.” Carol tried to laugh it off, the memory of blood splattering her in bed springing to mind. “Oh my god! You have haven’t you! Well?” She prodded with a goofy smile.

“Well…” _Selling sex, planting trackers, being witness to a murder, marriage to a criminal… technically kidnapping._ “Promise not to say a word? Swear it.” Therese crossed her heart with their joint hands, resting them upon her chest after. “I once… I got a tattoo… when I was in my teens.” Carol said. The only crime she had wanted to commit. The only one she hadn’t been forced into by circumstance.

“A … tattoo?” Therese giggled. “You don’t seem like the type of person to get a tattoo.”

“I was 15! My mother had just died. My father was furious. But I was mourning. I wanted her with me forever.” Carol said. She rarely talked about the past. She didn’t even think about it. She didn’t see that part of her body very often.

“Where is it?” Therese asked, not seeing it on any visible skin.

The blonde chuckled, the first time that evening and Therese seemed to watch the line of its melody. Infatuated. “Wouldn’t you like to know?” Carol winked. It was like being drawn in and thrown away, every sentence and every action with this woman. “Now are we going to break in or not?”

Therese took them through a series of doors until they appeared from the darkness and into the white of the gallery. They were a few floors up now but there were still a few patrols, thankfully Therese knew the pattern, and had made them wait behind the door to the installation down to the very second.

They finally came through and was thrusted into a complete darkness. Carol tightened her grip on the brunette’s hand trusting her as they walked through the abyss until Therese let go. “Therese!” Carol whispered, but it reverberated back to her like a shout. “Therese I don’t know where I am.”

“Wait there.” A minute feels like a lifetime when you’re disorientated in silence in the dark.

“Therese…” There was silence. “Don’t leave me.” She pled, voice shaky but it was replaced with a gasp as a hand found hers again.

“Look.” She heard, before the entire room lit up. They were stood in a triangular based pyramid of sorts. The walls, the ceilings, the floor made of reflective glass. However in each corner of the room were projectors building holograms on the surfaces. “They call it ‘The Vortex’ an immersive light display.”

It was like being weightless, floating in space with nothing but stars all around you. Until the stars changed into butterflies, dancing and flying around the room in all directions, neon blue wings against the black background.  “This is… unreal it’s… magnificent.” She said wondering in awe, her hands still tightly in Therese’s.

“Isn’t it?” The brunette said, looking around herself. She had felt the same when she had first experienced it. “Watch this.” She said excitedly, clicking the fish pond setting. Butterflies morphed into Koi fish, a few of which gathered around their feet, nibbling so to speak. “Go on, walk.”

Carol looked at her apprehensively, but did as she was told. It was like she had forgotten she was in an installation as she tip toed around the fish. They would disperse around her feet and swim after her.

She looked back to the brunette, a childish twinkle in her eye as Therese urged her on. “This is amazing.” She whispered, walking about the ‘waters’. She wandered the fish following her footsteps in the holographic splashes, dancing in circles until she bumped into the brunette once more. Full circle. They were close now. “No one has ever done anything like this for me before.”

It was true. No one had ever done anything selflessly for Carol. No one had ever cared to. The only person whoever really cared was her mother.

“Well they should have.” Therese said honestly, the theme around them changing back into the space feel. They settled into a sway with the calming music that came with the theme. “I wish I had my camera to capture… this.”

“It would be a little difficult to capture it all wouldn’t it? And I’m pretty sure they have policies against that. Although we did just break in so fuck policy I guess?” They both chuckled to one another, staying quiet, still aware of how they could be caught at any moment.

The smile slowly slipped of the brunette’s face, and Carol worried. Was she meant to worry about Therese? She could feel the borders between dream and reality fading at an exponential rate. “I wasn’t talking about the installation.” And then the borders blurred.

She felt her hand cupping the brunette’s cheek, not because she had to but because she wanted to. She felt their bodies float closer together, because she felt this pull not because it was the next step. She kissed Therese because not out of need but out of want. And Therese kissed her back. A kiss that would last in their changing surroundings until they heard footsteps approaching.

They pulled apart, a kiss interrupted, the holograms dying down at the click of a button before they escaped the way they came. They made it back to the storage room, running until they were sure they were safe. Or at least until Therese couldn’t help herself anymore, pushing up the blonde beside her work, locking their lips once more.

She felt their fingers entwine and press up against the wall. The last time she had been in this position Carol had been terrified, thrashing, but here she stood still and allowed herself to be taken although allowed wasn’t the right word, maybe urged as the kiss deepened, connecting on a more personal level, grips tightening, breaths shortening, heart rates rising.

 

///

 

 

 

“And, after saying goodbye you went round on the Friday?”

“Of course I did.” She scoffed. “I had never felt this way before.” She had never felt as if she had been in the right place at the right time in her life, ever. But Therese made it all seem like she had been, because all them events led up to her standing in that installation, questioning everything and it had barely been a day.

“And where was Rindy at this time?” Jack asked, pulling her from her thoughts.

“One of Rindy’s friends had been asking for a sleepover for a while. In the evenings we had been practicing, of sorts. I had my phone off silent. When I dropped her off the mother seemed nice, she was cooking organic foods and suggesting the kids go in the pool. We spoke for a while before I left, and I explained that Rindy could get a little jittery when I wasn’t around so it was best to keep her distracted. I changed in the car and met Therese at her apartment.”

“And then what?” He prodded.

She looked to the ceiling, blinking back tears. “Stop asking me questions I’m sure you know the answers to.”

“I’m obligated, Carol.” He said watching her forced her cries back.

“Have you got any news?” She asked Jack. Looking through him as if he wasn’t there. “I have been waiting for hours, do you know anything. Is she ok?” Jack was silent as he listened to the information on his earpiece. “IS SHE OK?!”

“The operation is still in process.” Jack said, bringing their voices back down. “I will let you know as soon as I have information. But we need to keep going Carol…” She sighed sinking back into her seat. “Things weren’t really going to plan.”

“No,” She whimpered, bringing a hand up to wipe at her eye. “They weren’t.”


	6. Ellipsis

There was a knock at the door, it was 6pm, on the dot this time. She knew who it would be. The apartment was clean and ready, her studio set up, looks set out. All she needed was a deep breath and her subject.

“Carol.” She said opening the door, finding the blonde stood behind it. Therese leant in, not knowing exactly what to do. She wasn’t sure what had taken over her in the gallery. She simply couldn’t help herself, seeing the blonde smiling at the floor, wading amongst the fish.

But now stood at her door she wondered if she had gone too far for a first date. She kissed the blonde’s cheek but Carol caught her face as she pulled back, pulling her in for a kiss. Therese remembered what had taken her over at the gallery. Desire.

They pulled apart. “Hello.” Carol said, the word washing over Therese’s lips.

“Hi.” They kissed once more before pulling apart completely, Therese still leant up on the door.

“Are you going to invite me in?” Therese jumped into action moving herself out of the way, holding out a guiding hand which the blonde followed, and soon seeing the lights illuminating the deep grey background which had a white mattress laid upon it, along with white bedsheets. She took a shaky breath. She had had her photos taken in this situation before just for very different purposes. “I’ve never had my photo taken before. Not like this.” She lied. “I’m nervous.” She added, an ounce of truth.

“You get nervous?” Therese asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Doesn’t everybody?” Carol said turning on the balls of her feet, still moving into the open plan apartment, eyeing the mattress that lay on the background. Her heart racing. She hadn’t thought of what the photoshoot would entail.

Therese followed Carol’s eye line. “Yes, but you don’t seem like… everybody.”

“Why? Because I agreed to do this photoshoot?” She said pointing to the equipment.

“Maybe… and by the way, just in case you were wondering, the mattress is a prop.”

“And the sheet. Wardrobe perhaps?” She said raising an eyebrow putting down her bag.

“If you feel comfortable enough. I just want a simple look for this shoot. You don’t have to show anything. I just want… you.” She said wringing her hands nervously wishing she had explained before setting the scene.

“Me?” Carol asked.

“You’re the only thing I focus on. I want the same to go for the camera.”

The blonde seemed to study her. She had this innate ability to make Therese squirm in her own skin. “… And these photos where are they going?”

“Wherever you wish. Depending on how they come out some may go in my portfolio.” Carol looked back to the set up and they stood in silence till Therese cracked. “We can do a different kind of look if you want. I have other-”

“It’s ok, Therese.” She interrupted. “I trust you.” She said with a smile. It was odd to trust again. Even though she knew Therese shouldn’t trust her. Carol walked over to the set, picking up the white sheet only to see a black one under it, she picked it up too.

“You do?” The brunette looked up to the blonde who neared, sheets in hand.

Carol nodded, but her steps faltered as she asked. “Should I not?”

“No, you should definitely trust me.” Therese reassured, not wanting the blonde to feel uncomfortable, knowing it was a lot to ask.

“Good. Now I presume I can change in one of these rooms.” Carol tried urging the conversation forward.

“The left is the bathroom.” Therese said, stepping aside to le the blonde through.

“What’s the right?” She asked out of curiosity, heading in the bathroom. 

The brunette was currently fiddling with her cameras. “My dark room. I develop everything in there.”

Carol stopped in the doorway of the bathroom. Dream lost colour and zoomed back into reality. “Like negatives and things?” She asked turning her head in the brunette’s direction.

“Yeah, but it’s usually locked up, the amount of times I have had someone walk in while I was developing film. It’s such a pain to begin all over again.” She sighed messing with the camera lenses, changing the warmth of the lights.

“Of course.” She said, looking at the locked door before slipping into the bathroom. Carol disrobed. She was fairly confident in her body. She kept her undergarments on but when she went to reach for the door handle she felt scared. She had done this time and time again. Maybe she was fearful because this time the reaction meant something.  “Therese?” She asked stepping out, seeing the photographer turn around, seeing her wrapped in the white sheet. Her mouth dropped open. “Where do you want me?”

Carol thought the fear would fade once Therese had saw her. It wasn’t as if she was naked or anything. She only looked it. Even Therese was trying to keep a professional face on but it was becoming increasingly difficult. “Er-Er-Er here. Here please.”

“Shall I stand, sit, or lie down? How do you want me, Therese?” Carol asked, shifting her weight from foot to foot as she was looked up and down.

“You can sit if you like?” Therese asked, gesturing to the mattress. Carol complied, clutching the sheet to her chest. She walked over, the gap in the sheet acting like a thigh slit to tease Therese away from her work as she sat down on the prop, the sheet fanning around her. Therese looked down her camera, changing the focus before placing it on the tripod, to fiddle with the lights, she needed it to be perfect to get the black and white effect just right.

“How did you get into photography?” Carol asked. She may as well. She had nothing to do but sit here and wait.

“We made pin-hole cameras in the orphanage. I have been obsessed ever since.” Therese said moving onto the next.

“Orphanage?” Carol asked. She knew. But she wasn’t meant to know.

“I grew up an orphan in Brooklyn.” Therese elaborated. “My mother left me on the steps one day, I was 3 months old. She tried apparently.”

“I’m so sorry.” Carol said. It was one thing to read it on paper, and another to be told. Especially now since she had taken an orphan under her wing.

“No need to apologise. The… some good people took me in after high school and the nuns were always nice enough.”

“These people? They helped your photography career.”

Therese seemed to think over her answer. “They gave me my first job. Which allowed me to pursue my photography career in my own time.”

“Do you think you will quit waitressing if you make it big?” Carol asked watching the brunette finish up, resting her head on her knees.

“I can only hope… Stay just like that.” She said running to her camera, taking a few photos. “Perfect. Ok, are you ready?”

Carol fidgeted. “I don’t know. I’m not sure I know what to do.” She had done a photoshoot before, however that time it was for the escort website and she had been with a photographer that had literally put her in each position.

“Well, you’re stiff, it’s coming through in the photos.” Therese said flicking through her few.

“I wonder why? It’s not like I’m being photographed nearly naked.” She said seeing the brunette look away from her camera and down at her.

“I’m sorry.” She said, her face softening. “Tell me about you.” She tried but the blonde only tensed further. “You’re even stiffer.”

“My best friend’s name is Abby.” She said. The first thing about her personal life to come to mind as the flashes went off. Therese leant forward, teasing a few of the blonde’s baby hairs to frame her face, a curl here and there pulled back from her swept back look that was locked by a miniscule low bun.

“What’s she like?” Therese continued, brushing over Carol’s chin with her thumb before snapping back into place, her camera raised again.

“Funny. Bubbly.”

“Look this way?” Carol did, seeing the flashes go off again. “Great, you know I think the black sheet would go better with these shots. Would you mind?”

“Not at all.” Carol hopped up and changed, and was back before she knew it. The mattress was gone and in its place was a velvet chaise lounge. “You redecorated.”

“Oh just a little. Please.” She said and Carol sat. “Perfect.” Therese neared, tilting Carol back into the chair positioning her legs and arm that she would rest on. “Stay right there.”

She hurried back to her tripod. “Look to your three o’clock. Now to me. Now to two o’clock. You’re a natural.” Enamoured by the content she was getting she switched her lens, taking the camera from the pod and coming to Carol’s side. “You know I’m still quite surprised that I haven’t seen this tattoo yet. I thought for sure I would see it here. Maybe on your leg.”

“Ah, it’s a little higher up darling.” She explained.

“What is it?” Therese asked, moving about her subject.

“[Wildflowers](https://www.tattoostime.com/nice-grey-flowers-tattoo-design/). My mother’s favourite.” Carol paused, a flashback of memories dancing behind her eyes. “She knew so much about flowers, she would probably chastise me for getting ones that could grow on the side of the road, but they were the ones I remembered her always fiddling with when we went on walks.” She said returning to the present. “They’re on my hip bone and the stem curls off onto my thigh.”

“Your high thigh?” The photographer quirked an eyebrow only to have her camera pushed away playfully.

“Sitting down was a pain for a very long time that’s how my dad found out. We used to go for picnics in that field back home.”

“Where is home for you?” Therese asked, moving the corner of the sheet. The fact they were talking made getting a perfect shot harder but they were naturally flawless.

“New York now. Back then South Dakota. But I moved to New York when I attended NYU.”

“An NYU gal huh?” Therese said lightening the mood, poking Carol in the ribs through the sheet making her gasp.

“Through and through.” Therese readied her camera again. “The days where I would believe I would get everything out of life that I wanted.” Carol said wistfully.

Therese lowered her camera, perching herself on the back of the chaise lounge. “Don’t you? Have that? Well paid job. Flat I presume. You seem to do well for yourself.”

“Yes… I guess I dreamed of more independence.” Carol said truthfully.

“What’s keeping you dependant. Family?”

 _Of sorts…_ “Oh no, my father, he… we don’t speak, not for a long time. I remind him too much of her.” She didn’t need to specify who ‘her’ was.

“And there is none other to speak of?” There was only one other person Carol would call family however she was scared to mention her name to Therese. She was meant to be on the job. This was all meant to be make believe. She should be seducing not crying out to the client her childhood dreams.

But then again, she didn’t know if she could carry on keeping herself boxed in when Therese had a way of making her want to share. Best to dodge around the no go zones – Harge, Mr Tucker, the trackers – and stick to the truth as much as possible. Even if this lost her Therese, she had the information she needed now. It was a saddening way to think about it. “I have a daughter.” She said, not that much shock registering over the brunette’s face. “Her name is Rindy.”

There was a short silence. But then a grin caressed Therese’s face. She lifted her camera, taking her photo. “That’s the first time you’ve smiled this entire shoot.” The flashes went off again. “Tell me about her.”

“You don’t mind?” Carol asked as the photographer hopped off her perch.

“No…” Just like that. ‘No’. No elaboration. No reasoning. No consideration just simply and irrevocably ‘no’. “Tell me about her.” She asked once more. “What’s she like?”

“Smart. Quiet. Funny. Do you ever just see someone and think they are so beautiful? That feeling’s quite common. But with her I see her inner beauty, her personality, her fear, the raw life inside, and it’s gorgeous. And then that beauty becomes them. You can’t imagine them looking any other way.”

The flashes barely stopped the entire time. “I have felt that.” Therese admitted, changing the lens one last time to take close ups. She hovered just above Carol now and the blonde instinctively put a hand on Therese’s waist to steady the photographer.

“You have?” Carol asked directly into the looming lens hearing the shutter click one last time before the brunette placed it on the floor, her face now a warm presence that looked down upon the blonde wistfully.

Therese seemed to contemplate her words and actions, the green gaze flicking from Carol’s right eye, to her left then back to her right, as if she was trying to see into them, her face concentrated and knowing. And even though from the outside she looked so wise, open and omniscient, Carol hadn’t a clue what could be going through this enrapturing girl’s mind.

 _What are you thinking?_ Carol thought, trying her hardest, she had always been able to read people; to know what they wanted. Sex, money, quiet, friends, companionship, love. But Therese always brought her to an ellipsis.

And then the angel’s mouth opened, and as if she had heard Carol’s thoughts aloud, she answered her first question, “Yes.” She paused once more, leaning in less than an inch more. “You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever met.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “You know when sometimes you meet someone so beautiful, and then you actually talk to them, and five minutes later they're dull as a brick. But then there's other people, and you meet them and you think 'not bad, they're okay', and then you get to know them, and their face sort of becomes them, like their personality's written all over it, and they just they turn into something so beautiful...”   
> ― Amy Pond Doctor Who
> 
> Inspiration to a few lines.


	7. Free Martinis

“The two of you began an affair.”

“An affair from a marriage I was forced into it. Sure call it an affair if you wish.”

“OK, you two began an intimate and physical relationship.”

“Yes, we had sex. And it was everything I had dreamt it would be, back when I used to wonder if it was as magnificent as all the girls would hype it up to be. She was the first dream of mine to come true.”

“I’m confused.”

“To not just have sex. But to make love. I can’t explain it, it just felt different. Like it was meant to be. It didn’t matter that it had happened fast and it didn’t matter that the intentions that brought me there were corrupt, it only mattered that I was hers and she was mine.”

 

///

 

Carol leant up from the chaise lounge, their lips closing the distance ever so softly until Therese felt Carol’s hands slip around her face, and pull her closer towards her.

Soon their lips met, the positioning forcing Therese to willingly straddle Carol’s lap, chasing after the blonde’s lips when she pulled away. They kissed languidly as the manicure red nails caressed the small of Therese’s back as she grinded into the lap beneath her, the light hold supporting her making her feel safe as she craned Carol’s neck higher to kiss her more passionately.

Muffled moans escaped their conjoined lips as Therese broke off their connection, kissing across Carol’s jaw and down her neck, not being able to help herself when she sucked a love bite into the curve between her shoulder and neck, gasping at the sound that tumble from the blonde’s lips before trailing back up to her ear, whispering delicately. “Carol…”

“Yes.” The blonde breathed as the photographer forgot about their entire photoshoot, nuzzling her earlobe with her teeth.

“Take me to bed.” The blonde pulled back and looked into the emerald eyes. This was her get out of jail opportunity. It was now or never. She bit her bottom lip as her heart pounded faster, she had all she needed from Therese. She’d reject the advances, develop the photos they had already taken and destroy the negative while in there.

And as her mind pushed the brunette off of her lap, and walked to the bathroom to get changed , her heart scooped her up into her arms, carrying her to her bed which was no less than ten feet away and laid her down delicately, climbing her body before claiming her lips.

She helped Therese with her clothing one item after another, for herself she only had her underwear to deal with and this continued until they were both panting with want, Therese naked straddling Carol’s waist. The blonde reached for Therese’s face once more but Therese caught her hand, kissing the pads of the blonde’s fingers, treasuring every part of her.

Carol slipped out of her grasp, moving her hand to cup the brunette’s face, kissing her softly, stealing each breath with a swipe of her tongue. She moved her body on top of the brunette’s with ease, settling between her legs before moving from her swollen lips to her neck, nibbling and kissing, cherishing each contour of her collarbone.

Carol could hear little gasps and sighs flutter from Therese’s lips as she moved lower, taking a nipple into her mouth and suckling. Therese’s sighs became silent as she turned her head biting into her arm. Carol moved to the nipple’s twin, nibbling a little and hearing her name ripple through the air in response.

“Why do you feel so inevitable…?” Carol asked, her hands roaming as the woman squirmed beneath her. She had never done anything like this. She had never really dated understandably, but she was pretty sure it didn’t feel like this. Maybe because she knew it would have to end.

She stopped teasing, moving down further, her hand and finger light touch following the path her lips were making over Therese’s flat stomach, before they surpassed her kisses, caressing down her legs, urging the brunette’s legs open as she looked up for the green eyes she was magnetised to.

Therese removed the arm from her vision when she felt Carol stop, finding her asking grey orbs, looking at her so intensely she got goose bumps. She nodded quickly, giving her consent before Carol moved further. She felt the blonde’s thick lips press against the sensitive skin on the inside of her thigh, getting closer and closer to juncture between her legs which burned in a way Therese had never really felt before.

She had never felt anything like this before. She had never asked someone to make love to her. Never lusted so badly that when undressing a lover, she stopped just to admire. Never felt fireworks from a kiss. Fire from a touch. She had never slept with a woman before. But with Carol, everything was different, everything was electric.

She could feel Carol’s nose nuzzle her mound, kiss it teasingly making her yelp in agony as she knew Carol was teasing. But just before she couldn’t take it anymore, she felt her tongue map her glistening slit, resting at the top, suckling at the bundle of nerves which spread the burn from her centre all over her body. Therese clutched the bedsheets, as her chest lifted from the bed. Carol used a bit more pressure using her mouth to pry more pleasure from the brunette, more moans.

The brunette’s breathing was uneven as she panted, not knowing what to do with herself, her hands shifting through the sheets until Carol relented, hovering just above her clit. “Tell me what you want, Therese.” Her low voice sending shiver through the brunette’s sensitive body.

“Don’t stop. Please don’t stop.” She pled, and Carol did as she was asked, picking up her pace one more, placing an arm over Therese’s hips as they couldn’t keep still. Carol could feel Therese pushing back against her lightly, as if she was holding back, and just before she was going to stop once more Therese said “Harder. Please harder.” She obeyed hearing her cry out, but she wanted to push Therese further. Make the crash back to earth even harder.

So she flicked the nib a little bit harder before pulling back for the last time. “Therese, you taste so good.”

“Please Carol, I’m so close.” She whimpered. It seemed like those words could apply to many things, although their time together had been short there was no denying the fact that the blonde was the most distracting and perfect thing she had ever seen, and the way she felt about her was indescribable.

Carol kissed down a little further, lapping up the essence from the source, hearing the brunette whimper. “Are you sure you want me to continue?” She asked. Maybe she was asking for her own benefit, because she couldn’t bring herself to stop now. Even though she knew she should before she fell any further.

“Yes. Please…Oh! Fuck!” She yelped as Carol entered her with her tongue, Therese tensing and relaxing rapidly beneath her as she got closer to the edge. Out of instinct the brunette slipped her hands into Carol’s thick blonde hair. She pulled a little, making Carol groan, the vibrations in her pussy making her moan out. “Carol… Carol I’m gonna cum.”

The blonde hummed in affirmation, moving her hand to her clit rubbing lightly which made her lover cry out. Therese couldn’t hold back any more and let her hips grind in time with Carol’s tongue pushing her deeper and deeper until the white flashed behind her eyelids and her back arched from the sheets.

She panted heavily, pulling Carol to straddle her and straight to her lips, where she needed her most, kissing the woman that had made her feel nothing but entranced, and now blissful as her orgasm still wracked her body from the light circles that still caressed her clit.

They slowly came to a stop and she pulled Carol back to look at her, tasting her own essence on her lips. “I… Carol no one has ever made me feel like that… I’ve… I’ve never…”

“You’ve never done this?” Carol said a little worriedly, brushing the brunette locks behind Therese’s ear, catching the lone tear that fell from her sparkling eyes.

“I have I just…I’ve never been with a woman… before you.” Carol could see the warring in Therese’s eyes, she wondered just how many wars were going on in that head of hers and bet that she had more, she never knew quite what she was thinking.

“Well… did you enjoy it?” The brunette nodded her head, her body relaxing a little more from her high as the blonde stroked her hair, her nails running along her scalp. “Good. I knew you’d never had a girlfriend but maybe... You came on pretty strongly at the bar that day.”

“I know I did. I saw you and it didn’t matter that you were a woman. It didn’t matter that I was one. I just knew I had to spend time with you. Does this make any sense?”

“It…” Carol knew the exact feeling, however she was having trouble in allowing herself to succumb to it. This couldn’t last forever. They were on a timer. “It makes more sense than you know.”

“I… I don’t know how to pleasure you.” Therese said worriedly, trying to mask it as much as her features would allow her to, but the blonde saw past them.

“Darling.” She said cupping her face. “I don’t mind, although maybe I should have been a little gentler.” She said, turning Therese’s jaw to brush over the lover bites.

“It was perfect.” Therese said holding her hand that rested on her neck. “I loved it.” The three words made Carol smile softly at the brunette who beamed up at her. She wondered how one day she would be able to damage someone so innately impeccable. “I want you Carol.”

“Therese, darling-”

“I want you in a way I’ve never felt before. I want to kiss your neck.” Therese said, leaning up to kiss the blonde’s pulse points, breathing in the intoxicating smell she could drown in happily. “I want to hear you whimper for me.” She took a nipple into her mouth, turning their bodies over so she rested between Carol’s legs, taking Carol’s long legs in her hands as she circled the nipple with her tongue, bending them at the knee, urging them to wrap around her.

Carol gave into Therese, crossing her ankles in the small of Therese’s back as she sighed her name.

“I want to make you feel the way you make me feel.” She kissed back up Carol’s body, caressing her ear with her nose after whispering. “Show me Carol. Show me what to do.” Therese pulled back, looking down at the blonde who searched her eyes. She brought up her hand to brush over Carol’s high cheek bones, and Carol turned her head to kiss it slowly, taking her own hand to guide it down over her body.

Their joined hands stopped over Carol’s slit and Therese gasped at just how wet Carol was. “This is how you make me feel.” She guided Therese’s hand up through her slit to her clit, setting it at a slow pace before letting go to trace Therese’s lips before kissing them. “Follow your instinct.” It was slightly clumsy but the fact Therese was touching her so intimately made the blonde unbearably hot.

Therese stuck to her pace, kissing Carol deeply, until she heard Carol’s breathing deepen, so she quickened, matching her breathing, doing so applying a little more pressure until Carol broke their kiss to moan out ‘Therese’ throwing her head back. “Carol… I don’t think you realise how beautiful you are.” She said, taking in a nipple, pulling it out with pressure and a pop, before burrowing back down.

“Faster Therese please.” She complied, releasing Carol’s nipple to look up at the panting blonde who was gripping onto the headboard, her chest heaving. Therese stopped and Carol whimpered. Her eyes flung open to look down at Therese. “Darling, don’t stop.” She circled Carol’s entrance with a finger and the blonde looked at her with determination.

The brunette met her lips before plunging in two fingers. Carol broke their kiss crying out and Therese halted her movements, taking the blonde’s face in her hand worriedly. “I-I’m sorry are you alright?”

“Yes, you feel amazing, don’t worry.”

“Are you sure?” Therese asked, and she only got a nod in reply, before Carol devoured her in a lip lock. The brunette began to move and the words that pleaded her only urged her on, plunging harder, finding a spot that made the blonde clutch her shoulders leaving moon shaped nail marks. She kept hitting that spot, finding that her thumb could reach Carol’s clit, so she applied a little pressure, a little inexperienced but effective non the less, feeling the legs wrapped around her squeeze tightly.

Therese found herself somewhere else in that moment. Somewhere that took mental screenshots that would develop instantly to be stored at the front of her memory. Some of the most beautiful images she had ever seen in her life. Something a camera couldn’t capture, so naked and vulnerable it was made only for her eyes. The blonde was someone else. No – Somewhere else, and to see the unaltered bliss upon her face Therese wanted to keep her there forever.

Carol found that Therese had unlocked something in her that no one else had. Whether it was the way she looked at her when she pried her eyes open, or the way she whispered how beautiful she was in her ear, or the way she wanted nothing more than to bring Carol to orgasm just pushed her pleasure further, and when her thumb found the sensitive bundle her body couldn’t hold back any longer. So she screamed into Therese’s neck pulling her as close as possible as her body burned with pleasure and writhed under her lover’s hold.

When she finally came to her senses, half draped over Therese’s body who was stroking her blonde hair as she rested on her shoulder, she tilted her head up to the adoring gaze. “What am I going to do?” She whispered aloud, a question with many answers. _Love you, leave you, save you from myself. Or maybe all three._

“With me?” Therese asked kissing Carol’s head which nodded. “Was I that bad?”

The blonde laughed, trying to memorise the way Therese’s bare skin felt moving against her own, like they fit together, like pieces of a puzzle. “Are you sure you haven’t done that before?”

Therese nodded her head. “I’m glad you liked it.” She whispered into the blonde’s hair. “Will you stay with me tonight? I understand if you have to go home but I would like for you… to stay that is.”

“Why do you want me to stay?” She said sitting up, keeping the sheet at her chest, her hair had fallen out long ago.

“Because… I want to wake up beside you.” Therese said catching a blonde curl between her fingers. “And I don’t want you to feel like this is the last time you will see me too.” Carol held her breath. She had never spent the night with anyone. Ever. She always made it a point to leave. Things got too personal, too messy. And here she was being asked to stay. “Why do I get the feeling that if you leave now I will never see you again?”

Carol felt transparent. She could leave, get one of Harge’s thugs to break into the apartment and destroy the negative. She could tell them the exact place of the pieces and have done with it all. But she couldn’t risk the thugs being caught, because then what would happen to Therese?

“I’ll stay.” She found herself saying, just like she would over the next couple of weeks. But she didn’t know that yet. “Plus I’m pretty sure you owe me a martini with an olive.”

Carol was pulled into her grip with a smile.


	8. Negative

“So by this point you hadn’t destroyed the negatives, or given Harge and his team the whereabouts of the photo. What was his reaction to this by the fourth week?”

“It wasn’t pretty, but I didn’t really care that week, Rindy won an award for girls’ football. I attended the awards ceremony. Life was still bliss. The week after wasn’t so blissful. Rindy got in a fight. Abby needed more shifts pulled at the store and Harge was getting restless.”

“What do you mean by _restless_?”

“Taking Rindy out of school before I could get there. Turning up at my work place. Sending me photos of Therese out and about. All to taunt me. He needed his information, until he didn’t. The man photographed, he died.”

“Died?” Carol nodded, but Jack looked perplexed. “He was murdered.” Leafing through the files he had stacked on the desk he pulled a file and displayed some of the photos on the desk. “Washed up by the docks.”

Carol closed her eyes gesturing for the photos to be put away. It made her feel sick. “Well… either way, it left no need to destroy the negative or the copies. All I had left to do was leave Therese. But of course things are never that easy.”

 

///

 

Carol awoke naked, the sheets pooled around her waist as she shifted slightly, the breeze for the window, open a crack, rushing over the valleys of her back, the juncture between her thighs sore and hair messy over her eyes.

She looked about the bed to find it empty. And then the apartment, but still no one. She was on the verge of calling out the brunette’s name when she heard whispers.

“No Dannie… stop you know this isn’t… she’s sleeping… I’m not ready yet… are meant to be working…” They died down as she crept to the wardrobe, pulling on a hoodie and some pants before creeping up behind her. She was leant heavily into the doorway by the time Carol got there and when she finally did she cleared her throat to make her presence known.

Therese nearly jumped out of her skin.

“Carol! You scared the shit out of me.” She said clutching her chest where her heart was beating rapidly. The blonde looked at her weirdly and then at the man she presumed to be Dannie who looked equally as ‘caught in the act’.

Carol approached her apprehensive lover kissing her chastely watching the brunette give her a once over afterwards. “What’s going on?” She said looking to Therese then to Dannie.

“Er… I’m sorry did we wake you?” Therese said, still nervous.

“A little but I was ready to get up anyway. I’m actually surprised you are up. Are you going to introduce me?” She said looking to the equally as nervous man in the hallway.

“Dannie was just leaving, Weren’t you, Dannie?” Therese stressed, gripping the door, her cheeks flushed.

“Hi, I’m Carol, Therese’s girlfriend.” She said holding out her hand. It had been a fair few weeks now and she was comfortable with the word. “It’s a pleasure to meet you Dannie.” He took it in his and shook it firmly.

“It’s lovely to meet you too, Carol.” He said, smiling.

“To what do we owe this visit especially so early in the morning?” Carol asked looking to her partner who was seemingly interested at nothing on the floor. _Maybe she’s embarrassed? Or maybe it’s just nervous for your partner to meet your friends when it’s clear you spent all night fucking._

“Well, I was on my way to work, and I heard from Terry the other day. She really couldn’t stop gushing about you.”

“Really? _Terry_.” Carol said nudging the brunette’s shoulder only to find it stiff as wood, Carol’s teasing smile faltered.

“So I was curious and thought I’d stop by to meet you.” He continued, pulling back the blonde’s attention.

“Well here she is, you should probably go. Have a great day at work Dannie.”

“Bye!” He managed to slip in before the door slammed close.

“What was that all about?” Carol asked, looking to the brunette but her answer came in the form of a crushing kiss which took her aback a little.

“Nothing.” Therese panted pulling Carol’s jumper off over her head. “You just look really hot and I couldn’t exactly take you with him stood there could I?” She said, lust crazed, diving back upon the blonde once the clothing was out of the way.

“You know we haven’t christened the dark room yet.” Carol said seeing opportunity. She needed to make Harge back up even if for a little while.

“We haven’t?” The blonde shook her head. “Let’s change that.”

 

///

  
“That was the first time you met McElroy?” Jack asked, writing it down in his note pad.

“Yes.”

“And by this point you still knew nothing?”

It was hard to believe but Carol honestly didn’t have a clue. Whether they chose to believe that was another thing. “I’m ignorant. That isn’t a crime. He looked harmless enough.” She snapped, tired of being asked the same question as if they wanted her to slip up some way.

“Alright. I’m sorry.” Jack said, placing his hands up in surrender. Even he was getting tired now, but he was doing a job.

“No I am, I… I’m just worried.” He nodded in understanding.

“Ok, we still need to move on.”

Carol stretched, groaning out. “Right… move on… perfect. Where was I? Oh, the meeting with Harge.”

 

///

 

“Here’s your negative.” Carol said sitting next to her daughter in the ice cream parlour, sliding the envelope over to the man who now sat with a huge sundae filled with god knows how many calories. How he and Rindy could eat ice cream in such cold weather eluded her. But she was hopeful for this meeting. She had finally gotten into the dark room and in the mist of fucking had spotted the negative on the wall. The very same one she then proceeded to press the brunette up against.

“I don’t need it.” He said, digging for a malteaser at the bottom of the sundae glass.

Carol scoffed in disbelief. “Are you kidding me? After _all_ of this you don’t need it anymore?”

“The man photographed, he died, natural causes. A stroke of luck for us all. His secrets went with him.” He said, lying had become natural for him. The further away Carol stayed from the truth the better. He had put precautions in place to make sure she didn’t know too much.

She didn’t need to know that in a moment of annoyance he had decided that killing him would be easier. He couldn’t stand to receive any more photos of Carol and Therese out and about any more. “Alright, then… why are we here, what do you want?” She said brushing Rindy’s hair before the girl ran to the counter for more Oreo pieces.

“You know, you’re so… good.” He said wiping his mouth with a napkin and then his mouth. “Good at your job. Good at this arrangement. Good at doing exactly what is needed of you.”

Carol sighed. She really didn’t want to be here longer than necessary. “Where is this going Harge?”

“Too good.” He said, face falling. He leant forward, eerily, slower than usual. “You understand that I can’t lose you right?”

“Unfortunately.” Carol said unblinking. If it had hurt Harge he didn’t let it show.

“It seems that your seduction skills have pushed your girl toy to love you.”

Now she blinked, rapidly as she tried to take it in. “What do you mean?”

“The new exhibit being put up in SOHO.” He said, reaching his hand back, the customer on the next table handed him a file. “It seems that she changed her mind at the last minute. Was it because she was missing this very negative or because she had found something more bewitching to put up.” He said putting an email on the table. It contained a few shots of herself. “You’re her new muse.”

“Oh my god.” She said leafing through the photos.

“Your face or body is in _every_ one – I checked. This one even has the edge of your tattoo in. And they are scheduled to be displayed in SOHO. Do you know what this means?” He said, sucking the air through his teeth, his blood rising in temperature. “It means you can no longer seduce without being recognised.” Carol looked up. Was this what she hoped it was? “It means you’re useless to me.”

“I’m free?” She sighed, but the elation didn’t last long, not with the look on Harge’s face.

“Oh… that’s what you’d like isn’t it? Freedom? How good does _freedom_ taste when you have no roof over your head? No food on the table? No income? A child with no bed? Hmm?! You want _freedom_. You still don’t understand that if you aren’t mine you are dead.”

“Harge-“

“Listen here and listen well. You will go to your lover and you will demand those photos. You have a right, look it up, I don’t care, whatever. You will _demand_ for any copies and we will burn them together, do you understand?” He seethed and when he received no reply his fist came down hard on the table just as Rindy returned. “Carol!”

It shocked the girl into tears which Carol could see she didn’t want to let fall. “Sh, Rindy it’s alright.” She soothed, pulling the girl into her embrace, smoothing her hair and urging her back to her ice cream.

“For fuck’s sake.” Harge sighed as Carol glared at him. “Look, I could lose you… Carol. Is this really what you want? Your face out there, it could get me into a lot of trouble ok?” He stressed hands shaking. “Bring me the photos. All of them, and leave that ditzy girl.” And with that he thought his word was final, clicking for a waitress to clear away his sundae.

“No.” Carol said, looking at the table cloth as the waitress left.

“Excuse me?” He said narrowing his eyes, straightening his cufflinks.

“I don’t want to.” She said, now looking him in the eye. She could see the anger building, ready to crush her. “I’ll bring you the photos, all the copies I swear. But I… I can’t leave her.”

“And why not?” The calmness in his voice unsettling as his body language said anything but.

“Because… Because I love her.” Carol admitted. Finally she admitted it. She had come to love Therese over the past month or so. Nipping into the bar for lunches, watching movies on the couch, making love in any place they could. Taking photos, making dinner. She was in heaven.

“You _love_ her… because you love _her_ … _Love_? What makes you think she will love you?” He spat. “The real you? I’ve seen the real you Carol. Walking round hallways in next to nothing, sleeping with married men for money, snorting god knows what at parties. That’s who you are without _me_! You really think she will love _you_ then?”

“I actually like myself when I’m around her.” Carol sighed, exasperated which only angered him more.

“You like the you _I_ created. I SCULPTED FOR FUCK’S SAKE!” He said throwing himself back in his chair, alerting some of the staff that sat by. He gestured for them not to take notice, before calming himself. Taking deep breaths, looking Carol dead in the eye. “I love you.”

Carol’s heart stopped. Not out of feelings reciprocated but out of fear. “What?”

“Do you really think you would be alive, sat here right now, if I didn’t? It would be so much easier to put a bullet through that pretty little skull of yours.” He said, reaching out to tap her head but she swatted him away. “But no. I gave you a child. A home. A job. And I ask for so little. And what do I get?” His fist came down once more. “This SHIT!”

“You don’t love me Harge.” She said voice gravely and eyes watering.

“I don’t?” He asked scoffing.

She shook her head praying the tears wouldn’t fall. “No… not really or you would let me go…”

“I would let you go?” He chuckled to himself, until he was cackling with laughter, wiping one of his own tears. “Get me the photos. And break up with her. Otherwise I will have to deal with her in other ways.” He sneered standing up, as did around 8 others in the parlour, following him out.

“What other ways, Harge?” She called after him as they strode over to their SUV’s.

“Let’s go!”

“What other ways?! Harge!”

 

///

 

“And did you break up with her?”

“What do you think?”


	9. Don't

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 66 years ago today Therese went round to Carol's and they bought a Christmas Tree.
> 
> It also feels like 66 years ago today, I updated this fic ;)

“Can I get a cigarette?” Carol asked twitching.

“Sure.” Jack nodded to the glass and no more than a minute later a man came in with a pack of Marlboro, a lighter and even a glass ash tray.

“Thank you.” Carol said more or less diving on the pack, her fingers shaking round a cigarette while pulling it from the pack. Resting it between her lips she lit it, breathing deep, thankful for the nicotine hitting her system after a few drags.

“Are you ready now?” Jack asked, anxiously waiting. The blonde nodded. “Good.”

 

///

 

“Hey, is Therese on shift?! I need to speak with her.” Carol said storming into McKinley’s getting the attention of one of the bar waitresses.

She blinked at her looking to the back. “I’m sorry ma’am but-”

“It’s important. Therese?!” She tried calling past her, moving further down the bar to the door but she followed.

“She isn’t in.” She said, arms up trying to calm Carol like one would a spooked horse.

“What do you mean she isn’t in? She isn’t at the gallery or the apartment. She _has_ to be in.” She had to be, it was life or death. She had to have this sorted as soon as possible. Harge was vague… but he was clear in his warning.

She called once more but suddenly the brunette appeared behind her, jogging through the entrance with her apron. “Hey babe, come for a free martini?” Therese’s smile fell when Carol turned around. “Hey! Hey, I’m here, I’m here, what’s up?” She asked, holding Carol’s upper arms. “What’s the matter?”

The blonde shrugged her off, even though the brunette looked at her wide eyed with worry. “I’ve just been to the gallery…” She lied. “A-are you putting up an installation of me?”

Therese looked from one grey eye to the other. “What?” She tried but Carol swatted her question away with the flick of her hand.

“Don’t lie to me, Therese, I know…” She breathed, chest heaving, she had been running round New York looking for her, and some small part of her hoped she wouldn’t find her. That Therese was just an apparition of her mind. That all of this was a dream.

But it wasn’t, and that was made clear when the photographer clasped her hand, tugging her from the bar. “Come, come with me.”

“No.” Carol said, her voice shaking now, pulling her hand from her grip.

Therese looked back in shock, but it hardened once more, as she was determined not to do this here. “I said come with me.” Therese grabbed her wrist this time, pulling her from the bar, down the streets and to the subway. They didn’t stop until they were safely in the brunette’s apartment when the blonde yanked free once more. Therese spotted the reddening around Carol’s wrist and fetched an ice pack, as a peace offering. “I’m sorry I-.”

Carol took it, along with a couple steps back. “My face is going to be splashed upon magazines and leaflets and canvases and you didn’t even think to ask?” She said disbelievingly.

“Some of the negatives for the last one went missing the other day. I let them look through my portfolio and they chose you. They loved you! They loved the photos because they’re beautiful. You’re beautiful.” She said gesturing to the blonde. “I-It was a surprise. I thought you’d like it.”

“Well I don’t!” Carol snapped. She hadn’t meant to. But the longer this conversation went on, the longer Therese’s life was in danger. All she could imagine was the brunette dying on top of her, just like Mr Tucker, watching the life pour from their face and heart, leaving from the gunshot. But this bullet she could stop. “Angel, I need you to take it down. All of it.”

Therese huffed. “Carol, I’ve already signed off on it all.”

“No you haven’t! Don’t lie to me, Therese!”

The brunette looked perplexed. “How could you possibly know that?” She asked rubbing her forehead.

 _How could I know that?_ “I just do… ok. I can’t let it go up.” She said, there were more and more holes in her boat of lies and she could feel it sinking.

“Where is this all coming from? When we took them you were _fine_! I told you my intentions.”

Carol’s hands flung to her head, gripping at her hair. The clock in her head was ticking. “There’s a HUGE difference between a portfolio and a gallery where prints and bids will be made, Therese. Now will you please… please just… please Therese, don’t show them.” She panted, feeling her eyes beginning to redden and water. “I can’t let you do this.”

The brunette paused, soaking in the words, looking at the desperation in the blonde’s face. She had never seen her like this before. She took a step forward and then two more so she was millimetres from her girlfriend, raising her hands to stroke the blonde’s face, tilting her head up. “Why not, Carol?” She asked, forcing the grey eyes to look at her, tears spilling over her fingers. “Not once have you said because it makes you uncomfortable or given me any other reasonable excuse.”

There was a moment, a moment, a glimmer of something in the grey eyes, a storm clearing, and a possibility of anything but it turned out to be the eye of the storm. The calmest part and now she was about to be swallowed whole once more.

The blonde jerked away once more, stepping out of the brunette’s reach. “Why can’t you just trust me when I say that you can’t do this gallery opening?”

“Because you tell me nothing!” _I CAN’T!_ Carol wanted to scream back but instead she turned away, running a hand through her hair, something Therese recognised to be stress related. The blonde turned, tears rolling as she thundered to the kitchen, pouring herself a vodka and then another after the first was thrown back. She brought the second drink to her lips. “Something’s scaring you… isn’t it?” The blonde paused, the glass quaking against her bottom lip as she looked at the distorted version of Therese through the glass. She threw the vodka back anyway. “Carol, what the hell is going on?!”

She leant over the kitchen island, shoulders locked, both waiting till the other would break and in the end it was Carol, standing up straight, not bothering to hid her tears. She let them rain and puddle at her chin. “Therese, take down the gallery or we’re done.”

The monotony of Carol’s voice was alien to her. It was eerily calm and serious. Usually Therese would wrap herself in the deep vocals but they had thrown her away to the wind. “Seriously…? It’s seriously coming down to this?” It was Therese’s turn to reach for a drink, pulling a beer from the fridge, not bothering to find a bottle opener and instead cracking it open on the side, taking a deep swig. She put it down, watching the foam build and settle. “Tell me why, and I’ll bring it down, all of it…” She offered hearing the blonde groan and then whimper. “Just tell me.” She stressed moving round the island.

But the next words hit her like a slap, stopping her in her steps. “I can’t do this anymore.”

Silence.

The brunette shook her head. “No…” Her own tears beginning to fall now.

“I can’t…” The blonde shrugged shaking her own, sniffing. Watching her girlfriend’s denial was heart breaking.

“Carol…” Therese said, her head rocking side to side.

And there was a moment of still, calm before the storm it would seem, until she swept out of the apartment, ignoring the claws at her body from the brunette behind her. “I’m sorry.” She said before shutting the door, leaving the wreck and ruin to call out for her, distressed in her wake.

 

///

 

“You broke it off.” Jack said offering her a tissue which she declined.

“I had to.” Carol told herself, looking to the ceiling blinking back tears that fell anyway. “I went to Harge, and I told him, I told him it was over between us. It made him more appeaseable… He was amicable about the installation, it wasn’t taken down fully but the photos were made so you couldn’t tell it was me. Photography wasn’t allowed. I didn’t attend the gallery opening but…”

“So what went wrong?” Jack proceeded.

Carol chuckled to herself morbidly. “She came back.” She scoffed.

“And?” He asked confused by the reaction.

 

///

 

“There’s a customer out front asking for you.” Abby said walking in, hitting the coffee machine in random places until Carol came over to sort it for her. It had been literal years and she still refused anyone that would offer to make her coffee than Carol.

“Really? Who? Anyone we know?” Carol asked watching the black liquid splash at the bottom of the white mug. She hadn’t really been sleeping and school wasn’t going well with Rindy. It made for a deadly melancholic aura to hover over Carol.

“I don’t think so.” Abby said, leaning on the counter, crossing her arms. “A cute little brunette. Theresa I think she said.” Carol’s hands stopped in mid-air, halting her movement. Abby frowned, waving her hand in front of the blonde’s face jokingly. “You know her?”

Carol rushed from the break room out to the front searching frantically until she saw her. She stormed over, not stopping until they were a metre apart. “Therese.”

The brunette turned gasping. “Car-”

“What are you doing here?” She cut her off, crossing her arms defensively. “How did you even know I worked here?”

It was clear the brunette had been crying. The thin veins beneath her skin a little more prominent. She hadn’t been eating. “I searched Abby Gerhard. Not that many in New York. Even less that work in furniture shops nearby.” She smiled a little.

“You can’t be here.” Carol said curtly, directing her eyes away. “You need to leave.” She said ready to direct her to the door but Therese stopped.

“I can’t. Not until you hear me out.” The blonde finally looked to her but her walls were still high. She was doing this for the brunette’s sake. “Carol, please.” She begged seeing the walls crumble slightly. “Please.” It was the first time she had seen Therese cry. She wished that she would never have to see such a sight.

“A-Abby I need to take the rest of the day off, could you cover for me?” She said, it wasn’t really a question, Abby knew Carol would leave either way.

“Sure.” She agreed, seeing the blonde sigh with relief. “Want me to pick Rindy up from school?”

The blonde walked to her, hugging her hard, a hug she returned. “You’re the best you know that?”

“Yeah…” They pulled apart. “But when we get back we need to have a long chat. And you will owe me a coffee.”

“We will I promise.” Carol smiled. It was nice to have someone who she could completely depend on. Who was nothing to do with anything she considered as fucked up. “Bye.” She said, happy she had a true best friend.

Carol picked up her coat from the coat hanger walking past Therese catching her wrist at the last second. “Where are we going?” The brunette asked, only answered with silence. “Carol, where the hell are we going?” She was pulled through the city, the subway and into a fancy apartment building, the doorman eyeing them until they reached the elevator. Soon they were entering an apartment, and Carol was throwing her coat down. “So this is where you live?” Therese guessed from the beautiful furniture and paintings on the wall which had clearly been done by Rindy.

“Yes.” The blonde answered gesturing around.

“It’s nice.” The brunette said looking about, trying to start small talk but Carol wasn’t having any of it.

“What do you want from me, Therese? I thought I’d made it very clear.” She sighed, walking to the window opening one before pulling a cigarette from a box on the window sil.

“The opening was this weekend.” Therese said watching the blonde light it. “I was hoping to see you.” The lighter was thrown down. “I removed any trace of your face or identity from the photos.”

“I know.” She said before taking a drag. “It doesn’t change anything, Therese.”

Therese scoffed in disbelief and the way the words landed on the brunette made Carol’s heart ache.. “How does it not change anything?”

“You still went behind my back!” The blonde’s eyes closing slowly calming herself. _I can’t be mad at her for that… I can’t._

“And like you don’t have secrets?” Her eyes flung open. “I must be a pretty fucking big one if the woman in the shop didn’t know who I was, I thought she was your best friend?”

“That’s different and you know it…” The blonde sighed. It was. Therese didn’t know about Harge. She could hardly compare not telling a friend to displaying fairly sensual images of someone in a gallery. “What do you want, Therese?” Carol sighed. The brunette’s presence was exhausting.

“Are you blind?!” She shouted, ready to claw her hair out. “Look I know I fucked up, but I have always wanted the same thing...I want you! Everything I do, it’s you!” She said exasperatedly, her chest heaving as she wiped her tears with her sleeve.

Carol put out her cigarette, standing from the window sill. “I want you too.” Her voice broke as she could feel herself welling up once more. She made no effort to comfort herself in the arms of her love, but that didn’t mean that Therese couldn’t see that she wanted to.

She neared the blonde, thankful she was allowed into her personal space this time. She cupped her cheek in her hand. And though Carol made no effort to move away she whispered, “Don’t…” The brunette began to pull her down towards her, begging for her lips.

“I’m sorry.” She breathed upon them, their foreheads resting against each other in the battle on whether to kiss or not.

“Therese… don’t.” Carol said once more, but it was too late, Therese tilted her head up, and kissed her. She was gone. Fallen down the rabbit hole which was her weakness for the brunette that pled for her. She kissed her back, now accepting her demise, accepting her own selfishness, as she was pulled to the bedroom.

 

///

 

“…And… I took her back. Because I was stupid, and I was selfish, and… and I didn’t know who I was without her.” She said grabbing the cigarette packet once more.


	10. Christmas Call

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My Christmas present to you all, 
> 
> Love 5c x

“I miss you…” Therese whispered into the blonde’s neck. She was trying her hardest to be with Carol, to be present, but it was like Carol was only half there. The other half was battling on whether to giver herself to Therese or not. “I miss you…” She said again, kissing her deeply this time, their naked bodies slowly grinding.

The brunette straddled the woman below her, kissing down to her breasts, trying to keep up with her heaving chest. “I can’t do this, angel.” She breathed, knowing that what they were doing was wrong. That she should stop this right away, but the hands that pulled her shoulders up said otherwise.

“Yes you can, Carol.” Therese whispered, putting the blonde’s hands on her back, rocking on her lap. “Please… please, Carol…” She peppered kisses up Carol’s neck across the pulse that was thumping, over her jaw to rest their foreheads together, eyes closed, breaths slowing.

She felt hands splay across her back and their weight shift so Carol could flip them over, lowering Therese slowly to the mattress. “I miss you too.”

Carol laced their fingers together as Therese bent her arms at the elbow. Their conjoined hands lingering just above the brunette’s head as they kissed, as if it was the last time.

The blonde pulled Therese back up again, kneeling as the brunette wrapped her leg around her waist, a hand on her back to support her and another mapping it’s way between them until it reached his destination cupping her sweetly.

Therese gasped into her mouth as she rocked, one hand wrapped around her shoulder and another holding the back of Carol’s neck. She was sweating in anticipation, moving her hips up into the blonde’s hand until her fingers slipped between her folds. “Carol…” She whispered like one would a deity.

It was hard for the blonde to open her eyes, knowing what could come of this, but she did anyway, looking to the brunette as she rocked in pleasure. Carol moved her hand to the top of her lover’s mound applying pressure to Therese’s clit hearing the brunette cry out at the pleasure. It wasn’t long before she was whimpering “I need you…” To the blonde.

And in response she felt two fingers enter her slowly, impaling her with desire and a type of care she only received from Carol. The fingers stilled as Therese regained her breath, finally prying open her eyes to see the clear grey staring straight through her. Carol had the capability to do that, to look at her as if she was transparent.

And even though the emotion in each one begged to be studied, Carol’s hand began Therese’s hips rocking, eyes never diverting, even as desire wracked her body making it shake, Carol was her rock, supporting her, adoring her with kisses, comforting her with whispers of how ‘she was the most beautiful person she’d ever met’.

Pulling her closer to the edge until she quaked around her fingers. Eye locked. Hands clawing. Breaths stuttering. Hair haloing as Carol lowered them to the bed, tucking the brunette under her chin. Therese pulled the blonde close, never wanting to let go, allowing a tear to trickle down her cheek before succumbing to sleep. She hadn’t slept in days, constantly working, never eating, and checking her phone and Carol more than she would care to admit.

 Carol buried her nose in the brown hair, breathing her in, wanting to patent the scent, make it hers and hers alone.

But it soon changed, her tears ruining it just slightly, lips trembling on the crown of her angel’s head.

 

///

 

“And then what?”

“She slept for a few hours, waking rather jittery. I assured her I was there and then I took her home. We kissed on her doorstep and she asked if we were alright. I said that I didn’t know and that I needed time, but that I would call her tomorrow if she promised to eat properly.”

“Were you aware that Harge and Therese had met at this point?”

Carol’s eyes darted from the lost unfocused point on the dull grey wall to Jack’s probing stare in an instant. “Excuse me?” She asked, even though she had heard his question clearly enough.

“Harge and Therese… at the gallery opening, a day or so before you reunited?” Jack elaborated.

She frowned. “What are you talking about?”

 

///

 

**The opening of the Gallery exhibition, SOHO Art Gallery**

“Thank you for coming.” Therese smiled to Dannie, he could see it was a little disappointed.

“Don’t worry, she might turn up.” He tried to reassure looking to the door where she was.

“More like pray she turns up. She’s the main focus of this entire thing. She’s the reason I’m here Dannie.” She said wringing her hands, her eyes so glued to the door she hadn’t recognised the man and his entourage quietly murmuring while looking at her work.

Dannie placed a hand on his best friend’s back, rubbing soothingly. “I know… don’t worry, she’ll show. And if she doesn’t then-”

“-Then I’m going to go after her.” Therese interjected, looking up to him.

“Never one to let go huh?” He said nudging her with his shoulder as she looked around anxiously.

“I can’t Dannie. Not with this one. Not with her… I can’t.” She said wringing her hands. Here she was with huge photos of the woman she was dating with her muse nowhere in sight. She wished Carol could see how beautiful they were. How beautiful she was. How sorry Therese was.

“Excuse me?” A voice snapped her out of her misery.

Therese spun around, he was dressed in a suit with rather a few men following him, and the height difference between them didn’t help either. “H-Hi. C-Can I help you, Mr…”

“That isn’t important. And yes, you can.” He said walking to Therese’s section of the gallery. “I would like to buy these photos please.” He said with a wave of his hand and before Therese could ask Harge had had answered. “All of them.”

“Well, I’m sorry but they aren’t for sale.” She smiled politely trying to redirect them to other profitable pieces but he was not budging.

There was a roll of his eyes. “Name your price Miss Belivet.” He said removing his cheque book and a pen.

“Sir, really, they aren’t for sale.” She stressed as he scribbled down multiple zeros before the decimal place.

“Everything can be bought, even you.” He said with a glint of his eyes, knowing that he had in a way. Everything was easy to obtain, he just had to own something that could own something else.

The brunette retorted with a squinted gaze. “What’s that meant to mean?”

“It means, little one, name your price.” He said ripping off the cheque. Therese’s eyes widened. “I would like them to be delivered to the warehouse b-“

“I’m sorry Mister… whoever you are.” She insisted, interrupting him from his near success with the cheque which she slapped back into his hand. “These are _not_ for sale.”

He gritted his teeth, looking around to the photos that he knew where his wife, flaunted and not by himself. His heartrate rising a little. What power did he have if everyone else thought they had it too?

“So be it…” He snarled, aware that if he stayed much longer he would certainly pull a gun. But then his mind clicked to something wicked. Something that would sooth his pride. “Know you brought this on yourself, Belivet.” He smiled a toothy smile, one that sharks would be proud of before gliding away, into the night.

 

///

 

“Here are photos of Hargess exiting SOHO later that night. We had been trailing him for a while.” He said splaying the high definition shots across the table, letting them fan out like screenshots of a movie scene.

“I see.” Carol whispered, glancing over them, seeing a very timid Therese lingering in the window as Harge and his crew stormed off. “And why was he speaking to Therese?”

“He was trying to buy the photos, and was unsuccessful after Therese declined.”

“Of course. And this is why he came crying to me after I… _selfishly_ took her back…” Carol said closing her eyes, her muscles aching as she leant back into the seat, her back straining and she let out a disgruntled groan.

“Exactly.” Phil clarified watching the woman stretch a little, knowing time was ticking on. “Tell me what happened next.”

 

///

 

“Carol!” Harge stormed into the blonde’s apartment. “Carol?! Where the hell are you?!” The blonde rushed from the bathroom, seeing her daughter following her closely behind but caught the little girl’s footsteps, telling her to stay in the bathroom and lock the door.

After a few seconds of silently conversing Rindy did as she was told and the blonde wrapped her red tartan robe around herself a little tighter. She rounded the corner, spotting the intruder who was swaying in the corner. “Harge?” She said with slight disbelief but deep down she wasn’t surprised.

He had never broken in, but it seemed to be a prospect she had been waiting for. “So… you want freedom huh?” He said hiccupping a little as he swayed to a barstool.

“Let me get you a coffee. You’re drunk.” Carol said, swiftly diverting herself to the kitchen cupboards, pouring from the pot. “Here, drink this.” She said, feeling his hand clamp over hers as she handed it to him. “To what do I owe this visit?”

“Do I need a reason to visit my wife?” He smiled.

“Yes.”

It fell from his face. “If I’m honest I wasn’t expecting such a curt answer.” His lips connected with the mug as he allowed the caffeinated liquid to pour down his throat. “You know when I was a boy I wondered what it would be like to settle down. To have my wife make me coffee. To take our child out after school. Have long conversations of matched intellect. The simple life.” He said placing the mug back on the kitchen island.

“Is that what you came to talk to me about? Did you come to thank me for making this fairly harmless dream a morbid reality?” Carol said drearily, frightfully aware that Rindy was still in the bathroom and she didn’t want her left there long.

“You no longer have to seduce. You can have your job. Our daughter-“

“My daughter.” Carol corrected seeing Harge eye her.

“You can have it all. Even a divorce if you wish.” He saw the grey eyes widen. “Ahh, the thing you desire most.” He chuckled morbidly. “I do love you, you know. You might not be able to see it because of that yippy little thing you call a lover which you ran back to like a _dog_ as soon as she whined!” He composed himself once more. “…But I do.” Carol crossed her arms, closing herself off, his love felt constricting, venomous, and persistent.  “I know what you want most is not your freedom from your old life, but from my name.”

“…” True freedom. She could become whoever she wanted to be. She could be free of him, forever.

“Ah, silence. It says so much.” He chuckled into his mug, finishing the rest, standing to put the mug in the sink.

“What’s the catch?” Carol asked, seeing him stop over the sink before turning.

“You see how well you know me?”

“What’s the catch, Harge?” She stressed, it was all too good to be true, it may be Christmas but miracles did not happen to Carol Ross.

“The catch? The catch! One last job.” He said smiling smugly as he leant on the countertop. He sighed tiredly before reaching behind him pulling a gun from the back of his trousers.

Carol’s heart skipped a beat as he made sure it was fully loaded. “Harge…” She warned lifting her hands. But it did nothing, he was raising the gun to aim at her head, closing one eye to try and focus. She was trembling now. “Harge, just calm down.”

“Oh,” He smiled nearing, seeing the blonde was now froze to the spot. “I’m not going to kill you Carol.” Carol pried open her grey eyes which were watering around the edges keeping her face composed. “Don’t you see?” He asked brushing a lock of her hair away with the pistol. “This gun isn’t for you - Well actually the _gun_ is a Christmas present, but the bullets, they have somebody else’s name on them.” He said pressing the barrel against her shaking head, she closed her eyes once more, hoping that Rindy would stay quiet and not move, that she wouldn’t run out to see her mother splattered across the floor, but she had no reason to hope when his hand retreated. “Therese Belivet.”

The words hit her ears and at first she felt a little safer, but the rest of their conversation flooded back to her and upon opening her eyes she found her husband handing her the gun that was once pressed to her head. “No…” She lifted a hand to her mouth to try and push down the sickening feeling but he caught it, dragging her through the apartment by the wrist. “No!”

She fought hard but he was a lot stronger, dragging her to the mirror. “Come here!” He pinned the gun in her hands and lifted it to their reflections. “Stop fighting it… Stop fighting…” He couldn’t meet her gaze in the reflection and the gun was still floppy in her hold. “Here hold it… Hold it in your hands.” He tightened his hold around hers, pressed up against her back.  “You see you hold it up like so, behind her pretty little head, or between those big doe eyes, depending on how heartless you really are, and just before she begs for her life? Pow!”

Carol was finally let go and she dropped the gun onto the table just below the mirror sobbing as Harge poured himself more coffee. “You want me to kill her?”

“Oh, you make it sound so dreary. I want you to murder her in cold blood. And when her lifeless body hits the ground… THEN and only then, have you earnt your precious freedom.” He finished the mug once more hearing the blonde chanting something in hush tones. He only heard once he had neared.

“I can’t.” She was whispering over and over, her hands burying in her hair, so he pulled her nails from embedding in her scalp, pulling her towards him quickly to land on her lips, kissing her sloppily as she tried to wriggle out of his grasp. She stomped her heel onto his foot and he let go with a laugh. “Get off me!” She yelled wiping her mouth, stumbling back.

“Oh, Carol, Carol, _Carol_ …” He said grinning, wiping his lip a little. His eyes widening with glee as the blonde raised the gun to point at his head. “Ah.”

“What’s stopping me from just ending you right now? What’s stopping me from making another path to walk?” She said, her voice low, thumb clicking off the safety.

“You won’t kill me. I’m Harge Aird. Basic innocent nobody, killed in cold blood by his wife. You would go to prison. Rindy would have no one! Do you really think she could survive losing two _more_ parents?” He tutted.

The bathroom was so near. She could picture Rindy sat in there. Alone and afraid. Locked away in a cold room while she was deserted once more in this life. She dropped the gun.

Harge didn’t even react. “Don’t you see I’m being kind? Not only am I offering you a way out but a choice. You either kill that pretty little thing you fuck so softly, or… you’re mine. And you know I’m possessive. I don’t want to share you. I don’t share… not anymore. Not with _anyone_.” He looked around the apartment, which looked so warm and inviting, seeing toys scattered under the tree and pictures hanging in most corners. “Where is our little girl?” He said heading for the bedrooms.

She caught on quicker than lightening landing two hands square in the centre of his chest before pushing him away, maternal instinct snarling at the danger. “Don’t you dare!” He laughed once more, holding his hands up in surrender.  “You’re sick. Making me choose in an impossible decision.” Carol spat, his carefree drunkenness infuriating her even more.

“No, I just… have flare.” He said with a twinkle of his hand. “It’s quite simple, honey. Either way that bitch Belivet dies, I have been vexed one too many times by her fucking innocence. All you have to do is choose between freedom and me, killing everything you love one by one until it’s just you and I. Until I’m all you have on this dreary planet and with time… The only thing you’ll want…” He looked at his watch noticing the time.  “I want your answer by the New Year. Aren’t I kind? That’s nearly a week you know!” He said picking up his suit jacket, flicking off some flint.

“Fuck you.” She snarled through the tears pushing them away with all of her might.

“I would like that and depending on your decision I might even get it!” He said with a sickening smile which caused instant regret to the blonde for her poor choice of words. Harge looked to the source of light in the room.  “You know that’s a pretty sweet Christmas tree. Rindy decorate it?”

Carol was shaking her head, not in answer to his question but to the gun that lay less than a foot away from her. “I can’t kill Therese. I won’t.”

“Sure you can! And you will, or… I guess you won’t need these toys anymore. Too much clutter. Where will my desk go?” He said, looking around sizing up the place. He could see he was on thin ice, Carol’s fingers twitching to pick up the gun and end it all right there and then, end him even. “See you around Carol.” Knowing he had overstayed his welcome before he had stepped over the threshold. “Merry Christmas.”


	11. Waterloo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I guess I owe you an explanation. 
> 
> I have absolutely no idea why but i have had such doubt in this fic. Call me crazy, but i just didn't like it. So I didn't publish it. And now i have rewritten all the chapters how i want them. And there's still editing to go here and there but not too much more. I also believe i have been grossly overthinking recently. i'm a stickler for stress, and the stress in my personal life has come out in my work, believing it's not good enough for some reason.
> 
> And only now unfortuantely do i see clearly once more. That i write what i feel and what i like. That a mistake or a small plot hole isn't the end of the world and as long as i have a passion for it, writing shouldn't stress me but relax me. However when you're in a certain mindset and you believe nothing you do is good enough recently its hard to dig yourself out.
> 
> So thank you for being patient with me. Thank you for the reminders. I have just been trapped in my own head for one of the first times in my life and it isn't pleasant but i'm learning how to get out and it has been a real learning curve for me.
> 
> So, onwards and upwards I think! Don't you? ;)

“You were stuck between a rock and a hard place. Why not just call the police?” He suggested with a shrug of his shoulders as if all could have been solved with one phone call.

“Call the police? Harge has ears everywhere that man, I wouldn’t be surprised if he had a couple men in the force. Fred had told me early on the threat that lurked round corners, I couldn’t have what happened to Mr Tucker happen to the people I loved.” She said diverting her eyes, if she could have called the police and have done with it she would have.

“So instead, you spent the week…” Jack cleared his throat wanting her to continue.

“Running away from my life. My decisions.  I suggested a trip across country. West. And I asked Therese to come with me. She said yes!” Carol said almost disbelievingly as if she wouldn’t have thought it to be true however she had lived it. “Abby was taking Rindy…” She said, looking elsewhere.

“You planned to murder her in the West?” Jack prodded and was rewarded with an icy stare for his efforts.

“No! I… I was going to run away. Take Therese away with me for a few days, show her what a life with me, away from New York, looked like… I would talk to her, tell her everything, ask her to run away with me.” Carol said lighting another cigarette adding to the growing ash pile. “Abby was bringing Rindy out on the fourth day. And no matter Therese’s answer we would be gone.”

Jack sighed, packing away his documents only to pull out another folder, turns out her case was larger than one would have thought. “Tell me about Waterloo.” He said, trying to hide the anxiousness at asking about such a recent and intimate event.

“Waterloo? No questions about our days together before Waterloo?” She said with a melancholy smile, happy to see one bless his face momentarily too.

He tapped his folder upon the desk. “I could hazard a guess, Mrs A- Carol.”

She tapped her cigarette. “Waterloo. The day of the deadline. New Year’s eve.”

 

///

 

“Carol? What the hell is this?” Therese asked from the boot of the car. Carol’s breathing stopped momentarily, hoping Therese hadn’t seen the gun in her case. She had brought it just in case someone tailed them, thankfully she hadn’t seen anything out of the ordinary. “How have I not seen this before?” Therese asked looking up confused from the boot, Carol’s fur in her hand.

Harge had burnt her old one and sent her this. “Oh, my fur… I haven’t worn it in so long, I threw it in the boot of this car and I haven’t really thought of it since.”

Therese tested the fur between her fingers before looking Carol up and down seductively. “Would you wear it for me?”

“You want me to wear this?” Carol asked raising an eyebrow, perching herself in the boot of the car, pulling the brunette between her legs.

“Just… This…” She emphasised blushing vulnerably, seeing the blonde’s eyes widen. They leant back together as Carol claimed her lips, kissing her longingly and then chastely, pulling away with an innocent look on her face. Innocent but daring.

Carol stared at the brunette’s lips, wanting to lean in again but then she remembered the conversation that awaited them momentarily, she shifted away, standing, pulling their cases out. “C’mon, we should sign in.”

“You go, I don’t know about you but I’m hungry, I’m thinking Chinese?” Therese asked, shoving her hands in her pockets, pointing behind her to the row of takeaways that lingered with neon signs.

“Chinese sounds wonderful… but hurry back.” Carol winked, failing rather adorably but her swagger made Therese swoon none the less.

“Trust me… I will.” She said nearly tripping over her feet before turning, determined not to make more of a fool of herself. Therese got back around 30 minutes later, putting out a cigarette on the windowsill before entering. Carol greeted her with a kiss. “Hey, would you mind grabbing some ice, the drinks have been warmed by the food.” Carol agreed returning in minutes.

“Bon appetite.” She said shaking the bucket. And another 30 minutes later they were laid in the bed, surrounded by nearly empty boxes. “Goodness I’m so full, that seaweed is good!”

Therese poked at her own food belly before rolling out of bed. “I know, I’m just going to run to the bathroom.”

She skipped off after a peck and Carol put the boxes in the bin outside. She refrained from going back in right away, lighting herself a cigarette. She was shaking. Carol Aird was nervous. The entire trip had been amazing. An adventure. She was pretty sure that with time you were meant to fall out of love. But she could only feel herself being dragged in further and further.

Her cigarette fell from her hand, it had been quaking so violently. _It’s time, no time to waste…_ She thought, dashing inside picking up her phone. She ran out once more, determined to dial Abby.

Abby’s number dialled but the lines were slow due to it being an international holiday. “Fuck, pick up.” She whispered, her breath turning to steam. It finally answered. “Abby! You haven’t been picking up my texts, are you anywhere near?”

There was a slight crackle on the other end of the line.

“Abby I can’t hear you, are you on the motorway?”

“Look to your left, honey.” It was his voice filtering through the phone. It was like death calling through her speaker, and when she followed his instructions she felt like death too. Stood there was a biker, in black leather and black out helmet. “You have 6 hours, otherwise I kill your best friend and our daughter. Call the police they die. Kill Therese, they live. Do you understand?”

She watched the biker move, staring at her reflection in his visor, how unrecognisable she had become. _How could I be so stupid?_ “Y-Yes…” She cried, trying to dry her tears as the biker moved back to his station. She knew what had to be done. There were no way outs this time.

She hurried back in wiping her eye, using ice to try and cool herself down. She was itching to get out of her clothes, everything was closing in on her. All of it. She was going to pass out, so she more or less ripped off her blouse and jeans throwing them into her case, snapping it shut once more, disgusted at the fact the gun was even in there.

She poured herself a vodka, wiping her chin and chest as a droplet escaped her. She felt stripped and exposed, looking in the mirror she regarded herself. She looked a mess. So she did what she did best. She slipped on a façade, along with her fur coat.

“You know the shower actually looks quite nice in this hostel. I would never have thought of going on a trip like this. I’m glad you dragged me along. I’ve never had anyone do anything like this for me… ever.” Therese said coming from the bathroom, slowing after seeing the blonde sat on the bed, wrapped in fur.

“Well I hope to do other things for you too.” Carol said, reverting back to an old script trying to bury the screams of anguish inside her. This wasn’t how she wanted to spend her last moments with Therese. She wanted to spend them on a porch of a beach house, sipping ice tea, growing old with grace, holding her hand. Not seducing her into false hope when their journey had barely begun.

Therese neared. “I always spent New Year’s alone, in the crowds…” She said crawling up the bed, over Carol’s body, parting the fur coat with nudges of her nose as she kissed up the blonde until their lips met in a sinful kiss. “I’m not alone this time.”

Carol couldn’t take it anymore, she needed a distraction to keep her true self from re-emerging, because Therese had a way of looking at her that broke down everything. She kissed her hard, writhing her body into the brunette’s palms, begging to be touched, to feel something else besides the enormous guilt that was eating away at her insides.

Therese kissed her senseless, parting the fur coat fully, sliding her hands behind the blonde’s back and kiss down her stomach. Carol arched into the kisses memorising each touch as Therese lowered between her thighs, licking up her slit.

Carol gasped as she always did, never getting used to it, every time like the first time they had made love. She reached down for Therese’s hair but let go when it only urged the brunette to look up at her. Screwing her eyes shut, she fisted her fingers in the fur.

She thought about every scenario, where could she go from here. What could she do in the next six hours to change this? When she opened her eyes she found Therese peering back, nibbling her jaw while her fingers worked wonders. “Tell me you need me.” The brunette whispered against the blonde’s head.

Carol opened her mouth, ready to whisper it back when she felt her stomach lurch again the acid tearing away at her gut.

She flipped them pushing her own pleasure from her mind entering the brunette roughly, hearing her cry out a little as she bit down on the blonde’s shoulder taken by surprise. Carol slowed until Therese nodded, taking up a faster pace between both of their legs, keeping her face buried in the nook of Therese’s neck no matter how much she tugged at her hair.

She didn’t stop and didn’t move until Therese had cursed her name out below her, peaking roughly and shuddering as she came.

Carol slowed her movements to a standstill, her breath making a patch of condensation on Therese’s dewy skin. “Hey, come… come here.” The brunette panted. Nudging her head against the blonde’s.

“It’s fine… I just, I just wanted to please you.”

“Ok, but I want you later tonight, because… Well, I don’t need reason…” Therese chuckled regaining her senses, but Carol didn’t reply in case her voice cracked. She was too busy directing the tears onto the pillow and not the brunette’s shoulder.

Carol rolled off quickly, sprawling herself face down on the sheets. Therese could tell something was wrong, and after asking a few times she decided to drop it, running her fingertips over the dips in Carol’s back, their sweat mingling. “I’m going to take a shower, come and join me when you’re ready okay?” She decided, not wanting to push or pry.

“Of course, angel.” Carol managed to say in a rather detached voice, it was the only way to ward off her oncoming breakdown.

“Look, I know you’re missing Rindy, we should pick something up for her in Chicago you know.” Therese said tucking a strand of hair behind Carol’s ear.

She wished Therese would stop talking, or pick a fight or push her from the bed, something just to punish her. It’s what she felt she deserved at this moment. Not, this perpetual caring and kindness that the brunette seemed to exuberate. “Yes, she would like that.” Carol whispered. She felt Therese beginning to get up off the bed when Carol couldn’t help herself anymore. She leaped from her position and pulled Therese back into her lips, kissing her deeply, sorrowfully, pouring herself into every movement.  “I love you…”

Therese was stunned, both stood naked and alone in the middle of their room, but she knew this wasn’t causing Carol’s vulnerability. “I…” She stuttered, taken aback by such a heartfelt confession, and also by the way Carol’s soul poured out of her eyes. “I love you too.” Therese said, as she thought her Carol had come back, the distance merely just a side effect of nerves for saying it for the first time. “Ok…” She said timidly before skipping into the bathroom.

 

///

 

“And what then…?”

Tears fell profusely down the blonde’s cheeks. “And then…”

“And then you rummaged through your case.” Jack filled in.

“I rummaged through my case.” She admitted, blinking allowing more to fall.

“You picked up the gun.” He urged seeing it was all getting too much for the blonde and they were running low on time and Carol’s patience.

“And then I … And- And- Oh God…” Carol cried, burying her head in her hands, rocking in her chair as she sobbed at her actions. The hands fisted, knuckles turning white as she pulled at her roots. She had lost too much. She wouldn’t lose anymore. “I have to know, stop keeping me in the dark. I know you know. Is she alive?! TELL ME GODAMNIT!” She said slamming her fists down, swiping miscellaneous items from the table.

“Carol-“ Jack said warily, backing from the table bit by bit as the woman raged and screamed.

“Don’t you dare ‘Carol’ me. Don’t drag me from the cell you put me in _knowing_ I have been in one my entire life, just to ask me questions upon questions which you know will tear me apart, and then expect me to fetch all the pieces of myself like a fucking dog just because you say my name! I demand to know! WHERE THE HELL IS SHE?” She said storming at him, like a thunder cloud over the hills threatening to batter down a city.

“Guards!”

Carol didn’t stand a chance as three barged into the room, grabbing both of her arms, pulling her elbows back and shoulders forward. “No, no, NO!” They lifted her from her feet as she kicked out, landing a few blows. “GET OFF OF ME!” She screamed, seeing her feral reflection in the one way glass. “JACK!” She cried, calling out for him as she was dragged by her jumper, the guards clawing at her as she thrashed. “YOU SON OF A BITCH! JACK! JACK!”

They rounded the corner and she was thrown back into her solitary cell, the door bolted from the outside.

After lashing out at the door until her throat was raw, she pushed herself into the corner, pulling her body into the jumper, covering her hands as she brought her knees to her chest, sobbing into her arms, constantly pushing herself away from the loneliness of the room and into her corner.

Everyone has a breaking point.

 

///

 

Carol could hear the shower running once more as she cried into the bathroom door silently, the gun trembling in her hand, the trigger hovering dangerously under her fingertip. She was a mess, one hand clamped over her mouth in an effort to silence herself as she clicked off the safety.

She had the urge to point it to her own head but she had done that mere seconds ago and it hadn’t solved anything. She wasn’t doing this to save her own life, but Rindy and Abby’s. Even though she wasn’t sure if she would be able to live with herself after this. She smacked the gun against her head in frustration that she hadn’t been able to think herself out of this. Think herself out of the shit show her life had become.

Her fingers, after feeling like an eternity later, closed round the door handle pushing it down to walk in. She could see her. Therese. Stood with her back towards Carol, her blurry silhouette visible through the steamy glass.

She was singing to herself and therefore hadn’t heard the blonde come in as she washed her body. Carol was sure she was going to throw up, each step nauseating as her arm rose through the air, the deadly weapon held with I tight grip so it wouldn’t fall from her quaking hand. Just like Harge had shown her.

She tried to breathe but it was impossible, her vision becoming obscured as more tears fell. She could hear her own heartbeat pumping blood faster than ever before, she could hear her blood rushing through her ears.

Her finger tightened a little on the trigger but refused to do so enough to let go of a bullet, so she held the gun with both hands, trying to still her nerves and blink the tears away since they refused to stop as the muzzle found its target, aimed at the back of Therese’s head. She was sure her life couldn’t possibly get lower than this, but in a cruel twist of fate it did.

She had let out a whimper, and in result Therese had turned round to face her, through the glass, those deer eyes, peering at her so innocently.

“Carol?”

That was it. Nothing would ever be the same. The façade had shattered. And so did Carol. Crumbling to her knees, the gun in her hand pressed to the floor. This was it, the lowest point of Carol’s life.

But that moment didn’t come and yet seemed to drag on forever.

Therese pushed back the glass and calmly smoothed the water from over her face, stepping out slowly. Carol thought she may have seen a faint air of disappointment and hurt flicker over Therese’s face as she knelt down but it was gone as soon as she’d blinked.

The gun was pulled from Carol’s weak grasp and disassembled in seconds, the remnants chucked in the sink. Therese took Carol’s wrist, her grip bruising as she pulled the blonde under the spray, pressing her up against the wall, her moves rough and calculated as she caged her in, keeping their bodies close.

Carol had no idea what was going on as the cold and unemotional face that had swept over the brunette’s face leaned into her, as if it would lead to a kiss but she darted away to her ear at the last moment to whisper.

“We need to talk. And I need you to listen.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so we have come to the end of Skulduggery: Part 1
> 
> Come talk to me down below, i've missed you all dearly!


	12. Crystal Clear

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to Skulduggery: Part 2
> 
> You, are about to read the exact same fic again, with the same timeline. Only with all the information you have been missing from Therese's perspective. 
> 
> And when you have finished Part 2 in a few Chapters time, we will move on to Skulduggery: Part 3. Where we will pick up where we left off in Skuduggery: Part 1
> 
> Enjoy ;)

“Agent Belivet will be awarded the case.” Ruby Robichek addressed her team.

Richard scoffed. “Are you fucking kidding me?! I have worked my ass off for this case and you’re giving it to her?” He said pointing directly at the brunette who sat at her seat with her arms crossed and eyes burning holes into his neck. She was still bruised and banged up from her last mission but compared to others she had barely been scathed.

Ruby was surprised to be confronted on her decision. But it was to be expected. A few missions ago Therese had slept with him, unemotionally, it had been a transaction, for her at least, and when she had turned him down for round two, bitterness had overcome him. “Agent Semco-”

“No, I want to know why. She’s only just got back from her last mission while I have been putting in hours here. I demand a reason.” He said, slamming his fist on his desk in the quiet conference room.

Robichek’s voice was unnervingly calm. “It’s simple Agent Semco.” She said simply, leaning forward.  “Do you have a vagina?” She questioned seeing him blush and squirm in his seat as others chuckled. “I thought not. Although judging from the pitch of your voice to me moments ago I could assume you didn’t have any balls.”

The McElroy brothers couldn’t help but snigger. “Shut up, Phil.”

“Not only is Agent Belivet proficient at going undercover, merciless and dedicated, but she also has the biological equipment for this task, unless you want to have a crack at seducing a lesbian and becoming their girlfriend?” Ruby smiled getting in her last jab, daring him to defy her again. He didn’t.

“Is that the mission?” Therese asked as Robichek put an image up on the interactive screen. It was of a woman, blonde, pretty, crossing the road in her daily life. Therese noted she was very beautiful. She stared a second longer than necessary before snapping out of it. The only way to do this job was to be emotionless. “Become this woman’s girlfriend. Why?”

“Why? This is no ordinary woman. We all remember the Tucker case, no leads apart from the missing child?” They nodded collaboratively. “Well we found his kid, finally, under a new name. Carolyn here is the now ‘biological’ mother to his child Nerinda Tucker, now aptly name Rindy Aird, like her ‘biological’ father.”

Therese’s head snapped up. “Aird? As in-“

“As in this woman, Carol Aird, is married to Harge Aird, owner of the contract killing business, _645_.”

“You’re kidding.” Dannie said tapping his brother’s shoulder as they leaned in.

“Here’s what we know, Carol Aird has no records or presence on the internet or on paper until a year ago when her name popped up on Rindy’s birth certificate alongside Harge’s, and she was hired into work at Frankenberg’s interior design store.”

“How did she end up married to this scum bag?”

“We have no idea. We don’t know who she was before, we only know that she leads a normal life aside from the adoption of Rindy. That was until… Cyrus Harrison, Jerry Rix, Jack-”

“All recent hits but not 645’s style.” Therese interrupted. “Where’s the connection?”

“We always wondered how 645 had become even more efficient in their hits. Watch.” Ruby said flicking on a CCTV video of Cyrus Harrison in a gallery, approaching a ginger woman and soon leaving with her.

“That’s her.” Therese whispered, having only seen her on the screen once she was distinctive in any crowd to her eagle eyes.

“She would seduce, plant and leave.” Ruby stated, flicking onto a gruesome photo of Cyrus’s washed up body with his hand clutching around a bottle which enclosed a fake suicide note. “They would be dead days later. Their movements known thanks to her.”

“She could have easily been forced into all of this.” Therese proposed finding it odd how she had no prior identity to Harge, it was hard to wipe everything of a person from the world. “Have we no fingerprints or DNA?”

“No, she’s a ghost, covers her tracks well, but what we do know is that this is the closest we have been to Harge Aird in a very, very long time. The stars seem to have aligned for us as well.”

“How so?” Gen asked, forever curious.

“We have managed to obtain a shot of one of Harge’s Hench men after a hit. And here’s where it all comes together. Therese, you’ve always been interested in photography, haven’t you?” She said turning to the brunette. Some others were surprised. They didn’t know much about Therese’s private life, just how she liked it.

“Yes… Ma’am.” She admitted to the surprise of a few.

“Well, you will be posing as a photographer, and this will be one of your shots, photo shopped a little to look more artsy with some others you may take to suit. They will be hung in SOHO. This is our bait to draw Harge, and undeniably Carol out from hiding. Knowing Harge, he will deploy her after you. He doesn’t kill unless he’s paid to.”

“Ok, how do I play this?” Therese asked straight down to business.

“You will pose as a part time waitress at a bar, McKinley’s, which will be hooked up, and a part time photographer, at your own home.” Robichek said flipping through photos of how the bar’s kitchen had been adapted with all of the equipment to listen in on any conversation.

“Excuse me?!” Therese let her anger slip. It was one thing to out some personal information about herself but another to use her home as part of a mission. “My apartment.” She reiterated.

“It has everything for the role. It suits you. It has the dark room and it will be easy to rig up with cameras and mics. It’s all perfect. SOHO is in collaboration. Everything will go swimmingly.”

“But _my_ apartment.” She stressed, not needing to say anymore for Robichek to understand her irritation.

“Agent Belivet you will have to retire there anyway when you’re done. Should the occasion arise she come looking for you she could go to uncompromisable places. Am I clear?”

Therese gritted her teeth, grinding them before slumming back into her chair, this mission seemed too interesting to give up over minute details. Usually undercover missions required her to be shipped off to another state and a lot of politics. But this one seemed calmer, less violent, and more intellectual. “Crystal, Ma’am.” She relented.

“Alright. Now, obviously this is a deep undercover operation and you Therese are at the head. You may pick your team from the people that reside in this room once I leave. Report to me with the names.” She said tapping her folder on the table to straighten the papers before leaving the conference room.

There was silence as Therese thought over her group and the mission at hand. There were no hard feelings when it came to choosing a team, you were either right for the mission or you weren’t which made it extremely difficult because she couldn’t help but not want Richard to be included in this op. However he was the best tech they had. “Look, Terry-” He began but she cut him off.

“I choose, Dannie, Phil, Gen, and …Richard.” She said, the rest of the team who hadn’t been mentioned nodding knowingly before also leaving.

“Thank you.” Agent Semco said, a little smug with himself, but Therese caught it.

“You even try to undermine me in this mission and I will have you thrown out and put on desk duty quicker than you can say ‘sorry’.” She said staring down at him until he dared to stare back. He nodded like a scared pup.

“I understand.” He said quietly and it was only then did she take her seat once more, but now where Robichek once stood.

“Ok, team. We have work to do.” She said swivelling in her chair looking to the image of the mysterious Carol. “Let’s find out who you are…”

 

///

 

Therese had been kidnapped, tortured, orphaned, shunned from the entire world even, but none of that came close to the hardship of having Richard Semco in her apartment. He had to come to fit in mics and cameras hidden in every corner. His attempts at conversations were rebuffed and when he had pretended to install another just to stay in the secret sanctum for a while longer she had thrown out his kit with him just behind it.

She had spent around an hour studying the little they had on Carol Aird, which for Therese was a long time. It only had taken her 30 minutes but she had become a little engrossed. She had staked out Carol’s routines and surely enough the art she had dropped off at the studio had been eyed by a shifty worker.

She followed the blonde to a meeting in an ice cream parlour where she was sure the file handed to her had Therese’s false life in. And low and behold as she sat in McKinley’s kitchen, working out whether she should make the first move in this dangerous game of cat and mouse, the blonde had walked into the bar.

She threw on a waitress’s uniform, trying to fit in with the normal staff as she squatted under the bar to avoid detection. Stealing a cloth from the side and a glass from the stacks that sat beside her she quickly rose to standing height.

“Who do I have to fuck around here to get a drink?” She heard the blonde mutter to herself, still staring at the band. Now was her chance.

“That would be me.”

 

///

 

_Sunday, Latte’s, 4 O’clock, Scottie’s._

She knew she had it committed to memory but for some reason it was on a loop in her head, in Carol’s voice. She washed her face with cold water, hoping to cool herself and wash the clamminess from her palms.

“Belivet you okay?” Richard asked. She just wanted him to shut up.

“Never better Richard.” She said towelling off her face. “What have we got, any marks on that glass?”

Dannie sighed. “Nope, none at all and she wiped off her lipstick print, no solid DNA that we can pull off that glass I’m afraid.”

“Fuck…” Therese sighed, scraping a hand through her hair. “But for first contact how did it go?”

“It was like watching a tennis match. You were bouncing off of one another.” Gen said with a smirk.

“Well it’s to be expected.” Therese said brushing it off a little defensively. “So, we’re just going to have to try again. Step one, find out more on who Carol Aird is, the more we know the easier it will be to infiltrate. Step two, use her to strike 645. Let’s get to work, I want images, voice recognition anything. We will find her.”

 

///

 

Therese sat amongst her scripts. She had gone off her carefully planned one at the bar by miles. This time she made three, one for any scenario she might encounter, only to be strayed from minutely and then pulled back to in order to complete the mission as efficiently as possible. She looked round her apartment, unnerved by the amount of surveillance in her private space and who wielded it.

She went to the bathroom, the only place that was bug free and stepped into the shower, with a certain blonde on the mind as she let the water beat down on her back.

 

///

 

“Flung out of space…” It’s funny how four words can have such a profound effect on someone, and even more so if that person was Therese Belivet. They seemed to fit into her life like a puzzle piece. Carol Aird saw everything that was her, but saw nothing. Perhaps Therese was the façade or the façade was her, she didn’t really know. “I… I asked you to coffee in an effort to get to know you perhaps, plus coffee is always a good first… date.” The blonde continued.

“ _Date_ , so that’s what this is?” Therese said gesturing to their situation, her hand landing dangerously close to the blonde’s. She could feel the heat radiating from her and that only helped perpetuate the diffusion of her intoxicating perfume.

Carol shifted her legs, placing her foot in between Therese’s, their feet pressing together. “If it isn’t too presumptuous to say.” Therese stopped breathing. It may have only been a moment or two but she scolded herself anyway, because her heartrate would be visible in the surveillance van parked across the street.

“No, it’s not.” Therese replied, her leg also moving to allow their ankles to touch too.

“You aren’t going to run from me in fear?” The grey eyes narrowed as if studying her, perhaps they were, they were both undercover after all. Shouldn’t it be Therese who was studying her? She had no prepared speech in her façade for this. So she reverted to herself.

Therese pulled the cup from her lips, her tongue slipping from its cave to swipe away the froth on her upper lip, eyes following her every movement. “No, I don’t think so.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do we think? :)


	13. Guilty

Holding Carol’s hand as they crept through the warehouse of art in SOHO was an odd sensation. Therese’s only surveillance was the wire in her shirt and the ear piece in her ear.

_Head over to the portraits now they are hanging down the next aisle along._

“Wow, they really tell a story.” Carol studied them as Therese studied her. The brunette could tell that she was really looking at the art. Therese had taken the collection, around the incriminating photo, herself. She had called the model, photo shopped her into the first image and then taken some spontaneous ones to bulk up the installation. She was glad someone else actually like her work, especially when they seemed to appreciate it and try learn from it like the blonde was doing now. “A girlfriend perhaps?”

“A model, I’ve never had a girlfriend before.” Therese admitted, her eyes not wandering from the art.

 _You’ve never had a girlfriend? So you are straight._ She heard Richard mutter down her earpiece. She muted it, ignoring protocol. They could still hear them but she wouldn’t have to deal with the occasional remarks from Semco. “No?” Carol asked looking to her. “Then why agree to go on this date with me?”

Therese looked to the floor, there was no one feeding her lines, she could choose exactly what she wanted to say. No suggestions, no muttering of possible lines to slip into conversation. “You’re different.” She settled on, rather disappointed in herself for her lack of imagination.

“How so?” _Well you are my mission…_

“I can’t explain it…”

 

///

 

Therese prodded at the door knowing the guards walks and posts of by heart. “Well it’s closing up soon. And we should live a little! Don’t tell me you haven’t done anything illegal in your life.” Carol laughed it off a little, but something flashed behind her eyes, Therese hoped she would let something slip. “Oh my god! You have haven’t you! Well?” She prodded with a calculated goofy smile trying to come off as trustworthy.

“Well…Promise not to say a word? Swear it.” Therese swore, crossing her heart with their joint hands, her other one crossing her fingers, it was now or never. “I once… I got a tattoo… when I was in my teens.” She couldn’t hear her team but could tell they were sighing with frustration.

“A … tattoo?” Therese giggled trying to hide her disappointment. “You don’t seem like the type of person to get a tattoo.”

“I was 15! My mother had just died. My father was furious. But I was mourning. I wanted her with me forever.” _So her mother died at a young age, and she has a tattoo. There were no signs of a tattoo in any of the photos in my file, or that I’ve seen. A tattoo could pull up a previous identity._

“Where is it?” Therese asked, not seeing it on any visible skin.

The blonde chuckled, the first time that evening and Therese seemed to watch the line of its melody. It seemed as if it was something which didn’t happen all too often. “Wouldn’t you like to know?” Carol winked. Therese felt that wink shudder through her body, and with the finger that had been lingering on Carol’s pulse point she could tell that the blonde was feeling this too. “Now are we going to break in or not?” The blonde asked. A clear deflection but she went along anyway.

 

///

 

Carol wandered the fish following her footsteps in the holographic splashes, dancing in circles until she bumped into the brunette once more. Full circle. They were close now. “No one has ever done anything like this for me before.” Carol admitted.

Therese couldn’t see any of the hallmarks of lying, but she didn’t have to. She could hear the truth pour out of her words. “Well they should have.” Therese said honestly, no it wasn’t part of her script getting too emotionally attached but she couldn’t help herself. She had to remind herself that Carol was assisting murders. That was the only thing keeping her grounded. The theme around them changing back into the space feel. They settled into a sway with the calming music that came with the theme.  “I wish I had my camera to capture… this.”

Carol would make a perfect subject. There was such hurt behind those eyes that she could tell very few saw, so much to unlock. So many stories, and decisions just waiting for you. “It would be a little difficult to capture it all wouldn’t it? And I’m pretty sure they have policies against that. Although we did just break in so fuck policy I guess?” They both chuckled to one another, staying quiet, still aware of how they could be caught at any moment.

The smile slowly slipped of the brunette’s face, and she could see the worry form in the blonde’s face. “I wasn’t talking about the installation.”

Suddenly she felt a slow hand lift from her waist and take solace on her cheek. It was cool against her warm skin and cupped her face ever so gently, but it was the way Carol’s eyes looked directly at her lips, as if warring with herself, unable to look away but finding herself being pulled in.

Therese allowed her eyelids to flutter close and then she felt lips land on hers. She kissed her back.

It felt like a lifetime since Therese had been kissed. Maybe it had been. Whenever she had done the deed it had felt obligatory, like a means to an ends, a transaction for someone’s pleasure or a biological urge. But this was something else.

The soft laps of their lips were exploring and soft, but also purposeful and electric. Therese felt her body naturally responding as she cupped Carol’s jaw to pull her in closer, never deepening the kiss but certainly pushing it further, lingering upon one another’s locked in time until they heard footsteps. Therese was sure they had more time, but perhaps time moved differently when with Carol.

They pulled apart, a kiss interrupted, the holograms dying down at the click of a button before they escaped the way they came. They made it back to the storage room, running until they were sure they were safe. Or at least until Therese couldn’t help herself anymore, pushing up the blonde beside her work, locking their lips once more.

She felt their fingers entwine and press up against the wall. This time they opened to one another, exploring with more desire as their bodies pushed into one another’s. Therese wasn’t quite sure what had come over her as soon as that door had closed. She hadn’t meant to push too far too soon but as Carol kissed her back with so much passion she knew that it was meant to be this way.

Or maybe this was Carol’s way. Such an amazing act. Therese had to be careful not to get wrapped up in it.

 

///

 

There was a knock at the door, it was 6pm, on the dot this time. Therese knew who it would be. The apartment was clean and ready, her studio set up, and surveillance locked in the dark room listening to every word. All she needed was a deep breath and her target.

“Carol.” She said opening the door, finding the blonde stood behind it. Therese leant in, not knowing exactly what to do. She wasn’t sure what had taken over her in the gallery and wondered if she had gone too far for a first date. She kissed the blonde’s cheek but Carol caught her face as she pulled back, pulling her in for a kiss. Therese remembered what had taken her over at the gallery. Desire.

They pulled apart. “Hello.” Carol said, the word washing over Therese’s lips.

“Hi.” They kissed once more before pulling apart completely, Therese still leant up on the door.

“Are you going to invite me in?” Therese jumped into action scolding herself because she knew Dannie was going to take the piss out of her for that later. As the blonde walked in Therese saw her eyes dart to the set up. She thought this had been pushing it too far as well but Genevieve had insisted, they needed a shot of that tattoo, wherever it may be, which meant, if she couldn’t get it this way, then there were other means which included a bed and aptly placed hidden cameras. “I’ve never had my photo taken before. Not like this. I’m nervous.”

It was like a bullet in the stomach. Carol was nervous, and here she was, planning on how to get her naked for the sake of a tattoo, and not just that, but on camera too. “You get nervous?” Therese asked with a raised eyebrow, trying to brush off her guilt, she scolded herself this time for letting her feelings leak into this. She had a job, and so did Carol.

“Doesn’t everybody?” Carol said turning her fee still moving into the open plan apartment, eyeing the mattress that lay on the background.

Therese followed Carol’s eye line. “Yes, but you don’t seem like… everybody.”

“Why? Because I agreed to do this photoshoot?” She said pointing to the setting.

 _No because you plant trackers on people for your husband to kill_. “Maybe… and by the way, just in case you were wondering, the mattress is a prop.” She tried to ease the tension. She had neither a mic or ear piece on today and was thankful because she would surely have Phil telling her to recede that last line.

“And the sheet. Wardrobe perhaps?” She said raising an eyebrow putting down her bag.

“If you feel comfortable enough. I just want a simple look for this shoot. You don’t have to show anything.” She could more or less hear them all screaming at her but found she didn’t care. “I just want… you.”

They spoke a little about Therese’s portfolio before the blonde interrupted. “I trust you.”

 _Would you trust me if you really knew me?_ She thought, knowing every camera angle in this apartment. “You do?” The brunette looked up to the blonde who neared, sheets in hand, swallowing visibly.

Carol nodded, but her steps faltered as she asked. “Should I not?” She frowned.

“No, you should definitely trust me.” Therese reassured, that’s what she needed, Carol’s trust. It was literally what this entire operation rode on. She didn’t realise how much it would hurt her to get it.

“Good. Now I presume I can change in one of these rooms.” Carol tried urging the conversation forward.

“The left is the bathroom.” Therese said, stepping aside to let the blonde through.

“What’s the right?” She asked out of curiosity, heading in the bathroom. 

The brunette was currently fiddling with her cameras, saying the next line straight from the pages of her script. “My dark room. I develop everything in there.”

Carol stopped in the doorway of the bathroom. “Like negatives and things?” The question was innocent enough but it pulled Therese back into reality. Carol was on a mission, just like herself. This wasn’t real. The hurt began to ache a little less.

“Yeah, but it’s usually locked up, the amount of times I have had someone walk in while I was developing film. It’s such a pain to begin all over again.” She sighed messing with the camera lenses, changing the warmth of the lights, making them a little colder.

“Of course.”

 

///

 

After getting over her momentary fluster, they began to shoot, Therese reciting off parts of her fact file and fake identity, it was similar to her own life and only slightly differed, sticking as closely to the truth was the best form of lie.

They spoke about life, Carol giving away a lot more than Therese, and lot that they didn’t previously know, like the fact she went to NYU, was born in South Dakota and has a tattoo on her high thigh of wildflowers for her mother’s memory.

The one fact Therese wasn’t expecting to receive was the one of Rindy. It didn’t seem very sensible to bring up what could be a deal breaker in a relationship, but her concern for Carol’s slipping facade faded rather quickly as even through the blonde’s nervousness to Therese’s reaction she couldn’t help but allow the smile to break through, like the sun through clouds, slowly then all at once.

 

///

 

Therese had never slept with a woman before. Not that she had never been inclined to do so, she found them attractive enough. But what with work being so incredibly busy and the thought of getting attached to someone while you’re being shot at was not her idea of a healthy relationship.

But here she was laying on her back, flinging her head back in ecstasy, with Carol’s head between her thighs wondering why she had ever denied the idea. In the back of her mind she knew there were people watching, colleagues listening, that this little rendezvous between them was for the cameras and to earn trust.

But she found herself enjoying it, and wanting to reciprocate. Which she did, warily. She couldn’t really describe the feeling of watching another woman come undone beneath you. Carol genuinely was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen, hands scrunching in the sheets as she completely let go, and laid her vulnerability in Therese’s palms.

Therese asked Carol to stay, she could see something in her eyes, something that screamed get out. An emergency alert swinging sirens. But she agreed anyway, laying half across the brunette’s chest before falling asleep.

Therese woke at 04:30 as Dannie prodded her. Gen was holding Therese's camera taking the SD card out with the photos of Carol inside, Phil was lifting DNA and Richard was sulking at the end of the bed like a petulant child. She was about to jerk in hysteria when Dannie clamped a hand to her mouth.

He signalled that they were rolling out in 3 and once calmer her mouth was released. Her comrades inspecting her apartment like a crime scene, taking pictures of Carols things, placing bugs in her coat and purse as she slept. Therese didn’t move until they had left.

She stared at the ceiling, the morality of her mission playing on her mind. She had killed, she had used, she had taken advantage, but never had it affected her like this.

She pulled the sheets up high, covering Carol’s body protectively even though it was too late, and pulled her closer burying her nose in the blonde hair. Carol in her sleep pulled Therese closer too, as the brunette kept the fact that the blonde was an accomplice to murder in a loop in her head.

It was the only way she could stop the guilt from eating her alive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A few ethical questions here.
> 
> What are our thoughts?


	14. Innocent?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 14 on the 14th!
> 
> Happy Valentine's day guys ;)

Days turned into weeks. Weeks into a month.

Therese had never felt so comfortable in herself, until she remembered it was all a lie. Her tactic of looping a mantra in her head - “She’s an accessory to murder.” - Failed her soon after Carol’s identity was found.

“What would your code name be?” Dannie asked Phil as they waited around for their boss.

“Something simple like, Jack, Jack Taft.” Phil shrugged.

“Jack Taft?” He asked, mildy disgusted by the bland name.

“My best friend in the 8th grade!”

“So, what have we found?” Therese asked, coming back into her apartment after spending the night at Carol’s. Sure, she was faking an identity, a life, but the sex, the passion, the energy between them, you couldn’t fake that, she just made sure to keep her feelings from it. Carol was a job. A job she wouldn’t fail.

“Carolyn Ross.” Gen said, adjusting her headset, clicking enter as a picture of the blonde appeared on screen at 14 years old, smiling with her mother and father. “It was hard to find… but there she is.” Gen sighed picking up her coffee.

“So, who is Therese’s fuck buddy?” Richard said spinning a fidget spinner.

Therese sighed, prying her eyes from the photo of the blonde, hiding her smile. “She is a mission, and a human being. Treat her with respect.”

Richard scoffed. “Treat that murderer respect? Over my dead body.”

Therese gritted her teeth. “She isn’t a murderer.” It slipped out before she could stop it.

“With the amount of people who have been killed due to her stealthy seductions, I think the courts would disagree.” He said laughing a little trying to nudge Phil to join in, but he didn’t.

Therese opened her mouth and then closed it. If she were to say anything then her feelings towards Carol would be put into question. _Not that I have any._ “You know I think Therese is right.” Gen said, coming to Therese’s aid. “Carolyn Ross is not a killer. I think… I think she may be a victim.”

“A victim of what?” Dannie asked, leaning in.

“Look, we now know her mother died young, well, her father ex-communicated her, not giving her a penny. But she was old enough under the eyes of the law to look after herself, and the hefty debts left to her too. She managed to get herself a degree, but with nowhere to live, no money for business attire, no one would look at her twice.”

Richard chucked his spinner on the desk this time, choosing rather to twirl in his chair. “So she had a rough start. Boo-fucking-hoo.”

Therese’s hands slammed down on the arm rests, bringing the orbit of the chair to a stop. “I am _sick_ of your shit. What makes you think you have the right to judge other people’s circumstances?” He opened his mouth. “Don’t answer that!” He closed it again. “Take this as a piece of advice from me, an orphan who also had nothing, to you, a rich kid who grew up in the suburbs with a private education. Shut. The. Fuck. Up.”

Richard swallowed, pushing her off his chair, rolling away a little, but quickly looking away from the brunette whose gaze burned straight through him. “… Okay!” Gen said awkwardly. “So, unfortunately, like too many women in these situations, as a last resort she turned to selling herself. At first it was rocky, we don’t really have much information on that, but she managed to get herself a rather nice… pimp. One we have tabs on.”

Therese studied the few photos they had. It was Carol, but at the same time it was like looking at another person. “You’re saying my Carol, she worked for… for this guy?”

“Your Carol?” Dannie prodded, making Therese throw away the photos and cross her arms at the slip up.

“Yes, she did. And here is where the tables turn in our case… You recognise the case number?” Gen said handing Therese a case file.

“The Thomas Tucker disappearance, of course. That’s the base of this whole case. Without finding Rindy we wouldn’t have even known that his disappearance could be mildly connected to 645.”

Gen brought up the images on screen. “Well on the day of his disappearance, he had a party, lots of drinking, dancing and of course…” She said flicking to an image taken the night of the party.

“Sex.” Therese sighed, seeing Carol in the corner of it, blurry but still there, looking decadent, but broken, sophisticated, but falling apart. “She was there.”

“Yes, hired out by Mr Tucker himself it would seem, looking at the brothel records that we now have thanks to her identity from the tattoo. And then she wasn’t. Neither was Mr Tucker. Or his daughter. But what we do have from footage on the motorways nearby is this white van, fleeing from the scene, which is what threw us off of identifying this being a 645 hit. Usually the men flee on bikes, taking back alleys. Now we presume this van had Rindy and Carol inside. The next day Carol Aird was born so to speak.”

“So she was kidnapped.” Therese said enlarging the photo.

“Abducted and caged is probably more likely. You see, she married him the day after the Tucker Case. Rindy became hers _then too_. Rindy I presume was someone she would protect.”

“She loves Rindy more than anything.” Therese said looking at a photo of the mother and daughter together. She remembered the shot she had taken of Carol after mentioning Rindy.

“Exactly. And I found a pattern. Every time Carol seduces, a day or so before, Harge picks up Rindy from school. She arrives, and meets them at the parlour.”

The CCTV footage played slowly, following the blonde. “She’s terrified.” Therese deduced.

“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Phil asked, chewing on his pen.

“She was kidnapped after seeing too much at the Tucker’s, and given a life with a gun to her head and a finger trembling on the trigger… She’s a prisoner.” Therese concluded.

“She may not even know much about Harge, or the business. She may just be doing as she is told. There’s a possibility that-“

“She’s innocent.” Therese finished. And that was that, her mantra had now dissipated into nothing. There was no crime. If she truly was unaware then she could be innocent. Therese picked up an image of the blonde stood in the corner of a photo, her fur coat draped over her. Face seductive, eyes dead. “Wrong place, wrong time.”

 

///

 

Spending time with Carol, talking to her, laughing with her, having morning afternoon and evening sex, it all became a lot more difficult. She no longer had a mantra to push back her dam of emotions. There was no malicious intent. It was just a woman trying to survive under the oppression of a tyrant.

“Hey, you ok? You seem to be zoning out a little.” Carol asked, brushing the brunette’s hair. She had come round for lunch during the day and they were sat digesting, watching some TV. Therese snapped out of her haze. “What are you thinking?”

“I’m thinking…” _That humans can be cruel. That what he does to you is cruel. But at least he is honest. Perhaps I am the cruel one._ “That I’m selfish.”

Carol frowned in confusion. “How so?”

“Because, you are so magnificent. And here I am, keeping you from the world.” Therese smiled, resting her hand over the one that cupped her cheek.

“Well, the world hasn’t ever been too fair or kind. I’m sure it won’t miss me. I doubt it would even notice if I was gone.” Now knowing what Therese did, those words meant so much more than she could have ever imagined.

“Maybe not, but it wouldn’t be much of a place to live.”

 

///

 

Therese had woken to the sound of knocking laid on the blonde’s chest as she breathed deeply. She shifted out of the bed and Carol’s hold, finding the blonde’s shirt and pulling it on. She was surprised that the knocks hadn’t woken Carol because she had never woken before the blonde. She opened the door.

“I think you should let her take the negative.” She heard a voice say, it took a few moments to pull out of her groggy state and recognise him as Dannie.

“Dannie?!” She whispered. “Are you out of your fucking mind, you can’t be here!”

“Relax!”

“No Dannie, this needs to stop, you know this is against protocol, you’re jeopardising everything! Carol is sleeping less than 10 meters from us and you decide this is a good way to meet her? Without my fucking permission.”

“Just listen, it’s important.” The brunette sighed trying to pull the door closer. “The case we have built this all around, has been dropped. The guy photographed in the image at SOHO. Dead, 2 hours ago. But we have a plan… Do you still have those photos of Carol?”

“She would kill me, Dannie. We have violated her so many times, the cameras the pictures of her tattoos, digging up every secret, every piece of paperwork, studying her life like an experiment. We can’t advertise pictures of her in a state of undress too.”

“We have no fucking choice! It’s this or we drop the case.”

“You are seriously trying to tell me that there’s no other.-” She heard incoming footsteps and then a hand drape around her. “Carol! You scared the shit out of me.” She said clutching her chest where her heart was beating rapidly. The blonde looked at her weirdly and then at the man she presumed to be Dannie who looked equally as ‘caught in the act’. They prayed to god she hadn’t heard.

Carol approached her apprehensive lover, kissing her chastely. “What’s going on?” She said looking to Therese then to Dannie.

“Er… I’m sorry did we wake you?” Therese said, still nervous.

“A little but I was ready to get up anyway. I’m actually surprised you are up. Are you going to introduce me?” She said looking to the equally as nervous man in the hallway.

“Dannie was just leaving. Weren’t you, Dannie?” Therese stressed, gripping the door.

“Hi, I’m Carol, Therese’s girlfriend.” She said holding out her hand. Therese felt herself blush, and Dannie saw it. It may have just been a flicker of his eyes but it was enough for him to know. “It’s a pleasure to meet you Dannie.” He took it in his and shook it firmly.

“It’s lovely to meet you too, Carol.” He said, smiling nervously.

“To what do we owe this visit especially so early in the morning?” Carol asked looking to her partner who was seemingly interested at nothing on the floor. Well, seemingly interested, or plotting ways to kill not only Dannie but Richard too.

“Well, I was on my way to work, and I heard from Terry the other day. She really couldn’t stop gushing about you.”

“Really? _Terry_.” Carol said nudging the brunette’s shoulder only to find it stiff as wood, Carol’s teasing smile faltered.

“So I was curious and thought I’d stop by to meet you.” He continued, pulling back the blonde’s attention.

“Well here she is, you should probably go. Have a great day at work Dannie.”

“Bye!” He managed to slip in before the door slammed close.

“What was that all about?” Carol asked, looking to the brunette but her answer came in the form of a crushing kiss which took her aback a little. Therese couldn’t have Carol over thinking the odd encounter.

“Nothing.” Therese panted pulling Carol’s jumper off over her head. “You just look really hot and I couldn’t exactly take you with him stood there could I?” She said diving back upon the blonde once the clothing was out of the way.

“You know we haven’t christened the dark room yet.” It was true, that room had always been locked for obvious reasons, but Therese played along, anything to draw the blonde’s mind from Dannie.

“We haven’t?” The blonde shook her head. “Let’s change that.”

 

///

 

Therese wasn’t quite sure what she had expected when Carol had left. As the blonde left with a passionate kiss, she closed the door walking back to the dark room, walking a little awkwardly too due to the soreness between her thighs, it had been a rather rough fucking, and now she knew why.

Because when her eyes had been rolling back into her head out of pure ecstasy, Carol had found time to pull the reel of negatives off the wall.

She sat down precariously, looking at the empty space before turning off the overhead light, bathing herself in red glow, the only time they had fucked without the presence of prying ears was also the only time Therese had felt truly betrayed by Carol.

But as she looked up to the reel of negatives she had taken of Carol on that second date, she knew she didn’t have a fucking leg to stand on.

 

///

 

Carol gave Harge the negative. Therese was sure of it. And her suspicions were confirmed when watching the live CCTV of their interaction at the parlour. She wasn’t however prepared for the way Carol had dashed from the scene. She must know about the installation.  

They had lost her trail and traffic in New York was bad. There was nothing. She was wearing a brand new coat, un – bugged. They had lost her.

They decided to head back to headquarters otherwise known as a sketchy apartment above McKinley’s. They were stuck in traffic a couple blocks away when Therese got the alert.

Dannie was sat with Richard and they had seen Carol on the monitors, storm in. She must have dropped Rindy off at Abby’s and gone straight to McKinley’s. And now Gen was trying her best to stop her from storming into the kitchen and threatening the operation.

Therese grabbed her apron off a coat peg in the van before hopping out of the back, sprinting through the crowd at full speed, weaving and leaping around people before she skidded to a halt, running into the bar, trying to still her breathing as she tied the apron behind her back.

“Hey! Hey, I’m here, I’m here, what’s up?” She asked, holding Carol’s upper arms. “What’s the matter?” She said trying her hardest to keep her breathing under control.

But the blonde shrugged her off. Even though she was nearly sweating from her run the small action felt like ice cold water all over her body. “I’ve just been to the gallery…” She knew that was a lie, but now she knew that the ploy had worked. Harge had found out. And subsequently Carol. “A-are you putting up an installation of me?” She looked so hurt. Betrayed.

Therese looked from one grey eye to the other. “What?” She tried but Carol swatted her question away with the flick of her hand.

“Don’t lie to me, Therese, I know…” It seemed that Carol had also been running as she breathed heavily. And the hot breaths that hit her along with the look so full of confliction made the hairs on the back of Therese’s neck stand on end.

Her ear piece then spoke to her. _Therese, you have no mic, we aren’t getting any of this, we need to get you to a bugged location._

She grabbed Carol’s hand. “Come, come with me.” She said sternly turning to walk from the bar.


	15. Shard

She grabbed Carol’s hand. “Come, come with me.” She said sternly turning to walk from the bar.

A resolute “No.” Stopped her in her tracks as well as the jagged force that ripped the hand away from hers.

She looked back to Carol in shock, the way she shook. She wanted to pull her into her arms, and brush through her blonde locks. She had violated this woman in so many ways. _How am I any better than all the people that have hurt her before?_ She took a step towards Carol, ready to spill her apologies and give in to her every word, but her earpiece lit up again.

_Agent Belivet, if you can hear me we really need to get you guys to a location. We’ve prepped your apartment. Belivet!_

“I said come with me.” Therese grabbed her wrist this time, pulling her from the bar, down the streets and to the subway. Her grip was like a vice but acted like quick sand. The more Carol fought the harder it was to get out of as she would contract the muscles and hold her tighter. She didn’t let go of her hand until they were in her apartment and the nagging voices in her ear stopped. It was only then she saw the red ring around Carol’s wrist as she rubbed at it.

It was going to bruise.

Therese’s mind fluttered back to the photos of Carol in Thomas Tucker’s house.  A few bruises here and there, her face a façade, hollow inside. And here she was looking at Therese as if she was a stranger. In a way she was.

Therese fetched an ice pack from her freezer, she always had some on hand, but always for herself. She never thought she would have to use one on someone. “I’m sorry.” She said, pressing it to the darkening skin softly.

Carol took it in her own hands along with a few steps away making Therese feel like a danger. It was the most degrading feeling she had ever felt. Usually she thrived on being feared, but now it was different. It was different in every way. And it hurt.

Carol seemed to snap out of the haze she had been in, looking around in disbelief before saying. “My face is going to be splashed upon magazines and leaflets and canvases and you didn’t even think to ask?”

“Some of the negatives for the last one went missing.” She saw a flicker of guilt wash over the blonde’s face. “I let them look through my portfolio and they chose you. They loved you! They loved the photos because they’re beautiful. You’re beautiful.” The best lies were warped with truth. It was a lousy excuse. It was shallow. Therese wouldn’t have accepted that excuse but never the less it was the one she was scripted to give. “I-It was a surprise. I thought you’d like it.”

“Well I don’t!” Carol snapped. It was the first time Carol had truly lost her temper, but Therese could see behind it. Not only was it the betrayal and invasion of Carol’s privacy but it also disrupted her life behind closed curtains. There was something else there, a melancholy care of sorts. But Therese couldn’t decipher it.

“Angel, I need you to take it down. All of it.” Carol sighed in defeat.

Therese huffed. “Carol, I’ve already signed off on it all.” She lied seeing another spark light in the grey eyes.

“No you haven’t! Don’t lie to me, Therese!”

She put on her best perplexed look. Now would be the perfect time for Carol to come clean to her. “How could you possibly know that?” She asked giving the blonde the perfect out, it was a neon door, flashing ‘tell me’ and all Carol had to do was walk through it. And then Therese could care for her, keep her safe from all of this.

“I just do… ok. I can’t let it go up.” Carol said, and just like that the door disappeared, and Therese knew this whole charade wouldn’t end well.

She was angry now. Angry Carol hadn’t taken the out. Angry that she was still miles away from keeping Carol safe. She didn’t want the blonde to be caught in the crossfire. But it seemed like they would have to leave it in the hands of luck. “Where is this all coming from? When we took them you were _fine_! I told you my intentions!”

“There’s a HUGE difference between a portfolio and a gallery, Therese. Now will you please… please just… please Therese, don’t show them… I can’t let you do this.” She said, and the brunette saw the grey eyes begin to redden and water.

The brunette paused, soaking in the words, looking at the desperation in the blonde’s face. She had never seen her like this before. She took a step forward and then two more so she was millimetres from her girlfriend, raising her hands to stroke the blonde’s face, tilting her head up. “Why not, Carol?” She asked, forcing the grey eyes to look at her, tears spilling over her fingers, giving her a second chance. “Not once have you said because it makes you uncomfortable or given me any other reasonable excuse.”

There was a moment, a moment, a glimmer of something in the grey eyes, a storm clearing, and a possibility of anything but it turned out to be the eye of the storm. The calmest part and now she was about to be swallowed whole once more.

The blonde jerked away once more, stepping out of the brunette’s reach. “Why can’t you just trust me when I say that you can’t do this gallery opening?”

“Because you tell me nothing!” Carol ran a hand through her hair in frustration, as if wanting to scream to the world but withholding it, the way she always did when stressed. The blonde turned, tears rolling as she thundered to the kitchen, pouring herself a vodka and then another after the first was thrown back. She brought the second drink to her lips. Therese tried once more, overstepping a line which she knew she would be reprimanded for but didn’t care. “Something’s scaring you… isn’t it?” The blonde paused, the glass quaking against her bottom lip as she looked at the distorted version of Therese through the glass. She threw the vodka back anyway. “Carol, what the hell is going on?!”

Therese leant over the kitchen island, shoulders locked both waiting till the other would break and in the end it was Carol, standing up straight, not bothering to hide her tears. She let them rain and puddle at her chin. “Therese, take down the gallery or we’re over.”

The monotony of Carol’s voice was alien to Therese. It was eerily calm and serious. Usually Therese would wrap herself in the deep vocals but they had thrown her away to the wind. “Seriously…? It’s seriously coming down to this?” It was Therese’s turn to reach for a drink, pulling a beer from the fridge, not bothering to find a bottle opener and instead cracking it open on the side, taking a deep swig. She itched her ear, turning off the voices imperceptibly. She was losing Carol.

She couldn’t lose her. _What am I losing her from?_

She put it down, watching the foam build and settle as she battled with herself. “Tell me why, and I’ll bring it down, all of it…” She offered hearing the blonde groan and then whimper. She knew that Phil would scold her for making such a bold move but Carol was going to leave. “Just tell me.” She stressed moving round the island.

But the next words hit her like a slap, stopping her in her steps. “I can’t do this anymore.”

Silence.

Therese shook her head. “No…” Her own tears beginning to fall now, maybe it was because she didn’t want to see an innocent be dragged into no man’s land or maybe it was because she didn’t want Carol anyone anywhere near this warzone.

“I can’t…” The blonde shrugged shaking her own, sniffing.

“Carol…” She said, her head rocking side to side in disbelief, she tried to think back to when she let her real feeling begin to blur the lines between reality and imaginary but it all felt like a blur now.

And there was a moment of still, calm before the storm it would seem, until she swept out of the apartment, ignoring the claws at her body from Therese who had seemed to have lost control of herself. “I’m sorry.” She said before shutting the door, leaving the wreck and ruin to call out for her, distressed in her wake.

Therese gathered herself, knowing as soon as Carol was out of sight Gen and Dannie would be rushing up to talk to her. She tried to steel herself as much as possible but she kept breaking down, turning off her mic. Somehow the blonde had managed to bury herself beneath Therese’s thick skin only to tear everything apart, leaving her around 1 minute to sow it all back together again and pray the scars wouldn’t bleed through her clothing by the time they arrived.

Looking in the mirror she washed her face hearing the front door open, pulling off Therese and putting on Agent Belivet.

“Belivet, did she?” Dannie asked tentatively.

“Yes, she broke it off.” Therese said, ripping the file from Dannie’s hands.

They could both see Therese was not in a good mood, but Gen proceeded to ask anyway. “Do we carry on with the installation?”

“I want all traces of her identity wiped from those pictures do you understand? Nothing that could make her recognisable.” She said, flipping through the pages, reading none of it, just keeping her eyes busy.

Gen looked to Dannie confused. “But then-“

“I don’t care! Do as you are told. Am I clear?” She said putting down the folder. Staring at them. Or should I say through them.

“Yes, Agent Belivet.” They yielded, standing still in the doorway, shifting from foot to foot as the brunette played with the glass that Carol had been drinking from in her hand.

“And… I… I need to erm. Fuck I can’t FUCKING THINK.” She yelled, perhaps it was because she was frustrated, or heartbroken or annoyed at herself for being so emotional, or even because she wasn’t used to anyone but the blonde being present in her silent and private apartment but she snapped.  “Get out…” She whispered, her grip tightening around the tumbler, the pads of her fingers going white from the pressure and once she had had enough of their stuttering and protests she slammed it on the desk in front of her, shattering it into shards of thick glass, one slicing through her hand before falling to the floor. “Get OUT!” She screamed in agony both physical and emotional.

After hearing them scramble out of the door she looked to her hand which was now gripping the desk, blood pooling beneath it and dripping across her porcelain skin onto the glass which was scattered across her floor.

Even her hard exterior could be cut through by something broken.

 

///

 

Therese took a day to herself before returning to work, the ice now full intact and a few stitches in her hand. There was still away to turn this all around. And most of it heavily relied on the opening night in SOHO art Gallery.

“Thank you for coming.” Therese smiled to Dannie pretending he was some other interested client she was trying to schmooze.

“Don’t worry, she might turn up.” He tried to reassure looking to the door where the clients were entering.

“More like pray she turns up. She’s the main focus of this entire thing. She’s the reason I’m here Dannie.” She said wringing her hands, her eyes so glued to the door she hadn’t recognised the man and his entourage quietly murmuring while looking at her work. She hadn’t been expecting him after all.

Dannie placed a hand on his best friend’s back, rubbing soothingly. “I know… don’t worry, she’ll show. And if she doesn’t then-”

“-Then I’m going to go after her.” Therese interjected, looking up to him.

“Never one to let go huh?” He said nudging her with his shoulder as she looked around anxiously, knowing Therese hated an unsolved case.

“I can’t Dannie. Not with this one. Not with her… I can’t.” Here she was with huge photos of the Carol, with beautiful images of the blonde scattered everywhere, yet her muse was nowhere to be seen. She had to turn up tonight.

“Excuse me?” A voice snapped her out of her misery.

Therese spun around, he was dressed in a suit with rather a few men following him, and the height difference between them didn’t help either. She recognised him immediately and was caught off guard but recovered quickly into her stuttering innocent girl role.  “H-Hi. C-Can I help you, Mr…”

“That isn’t important. And yes, you can.” He said walking to Therese’s section of the gallery. “I would like to buy these photos please.” He said with a wave of his hand, Therese a little shocked that she hadn’t seen this coming. “All of them.”

“Well, I’m sorry but they aren’t for sale.” She smiled politely trying to redirect them into another conversation seeing if she could get any information out of him but it was clear he was here for one collection only. 

There was a roll of his eyes. “Name your price Miss Belivet.” He said removing his cheque book and a pen. He knew her name, and he looked upon her as if he knew her too. Therese’s team wasn’t stupid, she had had a couple tails every now and again, which she had allowed to follow her, not wanting to make them suspicious.

“Sir, really, they aren’t for sale.” She stressed as he scribbled down multiple zeros before the decimal place, figures made possible by the deaths of others.

“Everything can be bought, even you.” He said with a glint of his eyes, knowing that he had in a way with his wife, he had bought Therese’s heart. Everything was easy to obtain, he just had to own something that could own something else.

The brunette retorted with a squinted gaze. “What’s that meant to mean?” She challenged and she thought he may crack, but the opportunity wasn’t worth the risk for him.

“It means, little one, name your price.” He said ripping off the cheque. Therese’s eyes widened at the amount he was willing to pay for them. _Why does he want her so badly?_ “I will like them delivered to the warehouse b-“

“I’m sorry Mister… whoever you are.” She said, knowing his name fully well after months of research, perhaps she snapped back so hastily because he was a murderer, or perhaps because he thought he was one up on her. But at the end of the day she was the one with his wife. Not him. “These are _not_ for sale.”

He gritted his teeth, looking around to the photos that he knew were his wife, flaunted and not by himself. His heartrate rising a little. What power did he have if everyone else thought they had it too? “So be it…” He snarled, aware that if he stayed much longer he would certainly pull a gun. But then his mind clicked to something wicked. Something that would sooth his pride. “Know you brought this on yourself, Belivet.” He smiled a toothy smile, one that sharks would be proud of before gliding away, into the night.

“Know you underestimate me greatly, Aird.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Getting close to catching up with Carol's timeline now!


	16. Deadly

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know its been a while. Life is very up in the air now. Not enough hours in the day, not enough energy to get through them all. We have all been there. But i finally found a day where I just came home and did nothing. Nothing at all. I laid in my bed, watched tv. A few movies. Scrolled through some posts on tumblr.  
> And today, i saw a post listing someone's (who I won't mention because i haven't asked permission and i dont know if they would like their username shared) favourite Carol fanfics. 
> 
> Low and Behold, Skullduggery was on there. I was so surprised.
> 
> So here I am. 30 minutes later. Posting the 16th chapter. The end of Skullduggery Part B. 
> 
> I recommend skimming over the fic once more ;)

After her meeting with Harge Therese had to rethink. She had to re plan. Her old script and methods tossed and she was back to the drawing board with the rest of her team scrutinising her every move. They were all tired, the opening only closing an hour ago, but Therese needed to have them all alert, even if it was 3am.

“Ok, so Carol didn’t turn up, but Harge Aird, he did. She’s still valuable to us.” She began.

Richard sighed clearly wanting to sleep. “So what’s the plan to get her back?”

“Let me deal with that.” Therese said. “But what’s our endgame here? We’re infiltrated but how do we take down 645? Dannie and I found that Carol is not only 645’s weakness but his weakness, you should have seen him when we wouldn’t sell the photos.”

“So, if Carol is his weakness we have to use her to our advantage. We need her on our side. There’s no way any of us a getting into 645.”

“And from what we have seen there is no way she’s going in there alone. “

“We should reveal. Give her a plea bargain, or if she’s innocent, we can offer protection. All in exchange for being a mole in his operations for a while. Have it set up for a week maybe two weeks’ time to earn back trust.”

“Sounds good to me.” Therese lied, in fact she was shit scared of how Carol would react to her not being exactly who she said she was. But it took Carol out of danger and that’s all she needed. “We’re so close I can feel it. I want everything smoothed out up top. Report back to them. For some reason I feel like I may have pissed of Harge so before you all crash tonight I need eyes on him, someone always on the monitors, you’ll take shifts.”

“And what will you be doing?”

“Getting back my girl of course.”

 

///

 

Therese knew where Carol worked, even though the blonde had never taken her there. Once arriving she met another familiar face that didn’t recognise her own. “Hi can I help you?” Abby asked politely.

“Sorry, could I speak to Carol Aird? It’s important.” She said with a smile not wanting to alarm Abby.

“Sure, can I take a name?”

“Therese.”

“Would you give me a moment?” The brunette nodded and the auburn ran to another part of the store. Suddenly the blonde appeared in sight looking around frantically until her eyes fell upon the brunette. It was nerve wracking the way she approached Therese like a blackening thunder cloud, yet the brunette still teared slightly at the sight of her.

“Therese.”

“Car-“

“What are you doing here? How did you even know I worked here?” She said, ever perceptive. Therese wiped her eye. She hadn’t been eating, she had been too busy, and even if she had the time too she wasn’t in the mood for anything but her job right now. She made up a quick lie addressed with a small smile. “You can’t be here. You need to leave.” She said looking anywhere but the brunette trying to direct her out away from prying eyes.

“I can’t. Not until you hear me out.” Carol finally looked down to her, this was her chance. “Carol please.” She saw the defences put up tremble a little. “Please.” And with perfect timing a tear rolled down Therese’s cheek. She wasn’t quite sure where it came from, all she knew was that it fell.

Carol made her excuses and said her goodbyes, having a quick chat with Abby before squeezing the auburn tightly and leaving with Therese’s wrist in her hand.

It was the brunette’s turn to be dragged through the city. She asked to where they were going and gained no response, but after arriving in quite a rich neighbourhood she took a wild guess, imperceptibly slipping her mic into her pocket so it wouldn’t be found on her body.

Soon they were entering an apartment, and Carol was throwing her coat down. “So this is where you live?” Therese guessed from the beautiful furniture and paintings on the wall which had clearly been done by Rindy.

“Yes.” The blonde answered gesturing around.

“It’s nice.” The brunette said looking about, trying to start small talk but Carol wasn’t having any of it. “I can’t believe this is the first time I’ve been here.” _She could believe it._

“What do you want from me, Therese? I thought I’d made it very clear.” Carol sighed, walking to the window opening one before pulling a cigarette from a box on the window sill.

“The opening was this weekend.” Therese said watching the blonde light it. “I was hoping to see you.” The lighter was thrown down. “I removed any trace of your face or identity from the photos.”

“I know.” She said before taking a drag. “It doesn’t change anything.”

Therese couldn’t accept that answer. “How does it not change anything?”

“You still went behind my back!” That was a snapping point for both of them. _Behind her back?! She was hired to steal from me. To seduce and lure property from. She has a husband and child and she is annoyed I went behind her back!_  

Therese couldn’t bite back her words. “And like you don’t have secrets?” Carol’s eyes flung open. Therese had to think of a lie on the spot. “The woman in the shop didn’t know who I was, I thought she was your best friend?”

“That’s different and you know it…” The blonde sighed. It was. Therese had published photos of her without her permission to the public to keep her case from going under. Whereas Carol had kept Therese a secret and tried to pry herself away from her in an effort to keep Therese safe. There was obviously a lot more on either parts but neither Carol nor Therese knew fully about those, yet. “What do you want, Therese?” Carol sighed. The brunette’s presence was exhausting.

 _What do I want? What do I WANT?!_ Even an idiot could see, even Therese could see that she was no longer being a professional. That she had put parts of herself on the line, gone against protocol and played things on hope for Carol. All things she had never done before. What did she want?

“Are you blind?!” She shouted, ready to claw her hair out. “I want you! Everything I do, it’s you!” She said exasperatedly, her chest heaving as she wiped her tears with her sleeve, real and ugly tears that only fell when you didn’t want them to.

Carol put out her cigarette, standing from the window sill. “I want you too.” Her voice broke as she could feel herself welling up once more. She made no effort to comfort herself in the arms of her love, but that didn’t mean that Therese couldn’t see that she wanted to.

She neared the blonde, thankful she was allowed into her personal space this time. She cupped her cheek in her hand. And though Carol made no effort to move away she whispered, “Don’t…” The brunette began to pull her down towards her, trying to seal them together once more. She knew that once they took this step together there was no going back.

If Carol wouldn’t take her outs, then she would become part of Therese’s plan whether she knew it or not. Because at the end of the day Therese had to keep Carol safe.

“I’m sorry.” She breathed upon them, their foreheads resting against each other in the battle on whether to kiss or not. She was sorry for many things. For the photos, the deception, the betrayal, the shit Carol had been dragged through her for the entirety of her life, for the shit Therese continued to drag her through unwillingly.

But most of all she was sorry for making this real. She was sorry for falling in love.

“Therese… don’t.” Carol said once more, but it was too late, Therese tilted her head up, and kissed her. She was gone. Fallen down the rabbit hole which was her weakness for the brunette that pled for her. She kissed her back, now accepting her demise, accepting her own selfishness, as she was pulled to the bedroom.

 

///

 

Therese tucked herself under Carol’s chin that night, allowing herself to be held as her breathing slowed and her body relaxed, waiting long enough to make the blonde believe she was asleep. She never slept before Carol.

It was times when Carol thought Therese was asleep that the brunette learnt the most about the blonde.

It was exhausting, trying to keep her eyes pried open, or even worse, closed and pretending to be asleep, but never being allowed to fall into the comfort of Carol’s arms. She felt Carol’s nose bury in her hair and sigh deeply only to inhale slowly, breathing her in.

She felt the first one fall on her crown, and then another droplet, but the third and fourth were barely felt as the blonde’s lips trembled against her skull. Therese allowed herself to fall asleep in Carol’s arms for the first time.

 

///

 

Therese wasn’t exactly sure when it happened but something changed. She was sure it was a few days after they got back together. Carol seemed more anxious and more distant. It was odd. She couldn’t put her finger on it but Carol seemed like a different person.

And before she knew it Therese was agreeing to a road trip just to see if it would make the blonde happy again. It didn’t. And she suffered the consequences of her actions.

“And what exactly do you hope to prove? This undercover operation has gained us little progress in the infiltration of 645.” Robichek said, clearly unimpressed with their plea to take this national.

“Look, Carol is our way in I know it. She’s literally in the palm of my hand. We have Harge’s attention I met the man myself. Ma’am you should have seen him. He was furious about the exhibition. Furious. Having her as leverage or leeway could help the grand scheme of things.”

“A road trip?” Robichek scoffed clearly or pleased or convinced.

“It was Carol’s decision not mine and I think away from the city we might just have enough privacy to persuade her onto our side. Become the perfect mole.”

Robichek chewed her cheek, weighing her odds and looking over the months of reports. “… Fine. But keep your head clear Agent Belivet.” She said concerned that one of her top agents had changed in her approach to her. Belivet never asked, she made decisions and they were either granted or denied, but here she was, begging.

“It is.” Therese sighed, almost relieved.

“Is it?” Robichek challenged.

“Ma’am?”

Robichek put down her pen, looking up from her work. “Have you stopped to think why she may be inviting you on this road trip? Her mission was to seduce you to destroy those negatives. The negatives are gone. What’s her new mission?” She saw the question roll around in the brunette’s mind obviously a thought not to pass it yet. “Don’t get wrapped up in that Black Widow’s web Belivet. Because believe me, even I won’t be able to save you then.”

A black widow. Beautiful and seductive, and could kill you with one bite. A deadly trap that you can’t help but fall into. She knew exactly how they worked, because she was a black widow for the many missions she had been on. And now, she was prey. “Ma’am.”

 

///

 

“Look there’s a deli over there. Fancy replenishing our lunch supplies?” Therese asked, needing an excuse to get them both out so her team could place mics in the car. Since her talk with Robichek she had become more focused on her mission, and was relying on protocol to try and bring her back to solid ground again.

“Sure, angel, that sounds good.”

 

///

 

“A gun?!”

“Yes, it was clear as day in her suitcase. No registration number. No nothing. The same issue 645 use.” Phil clarified, showing her a few photos. At first they had chastised Richard for flipping open Carol’s case but after finding what they did, they were grateful for his jealously.

“She’s… she wouldn’t.” Therese said staring at the photo, but there it was clear as day on top of Carol’s clothing.

“We don’t know that. You have to be careful, Therese. She could be really dangerous and we have noticed something else.”

“What?” She asked her head snapping up as they looked to each other.

“You have one of Harge’s minions on your tail.”

Her attention directed back to the gun as she shook her head. “She couldn’t… She couldn’t.”

“Yeah well as much as I would love to believe that she doesn’t have a choice bullshit, it seems pretty clear what she brought you on this trip for. All we’re saying is watch your back Belivet.” Richard smirked, taking the photo from his hand, things finally seemed to be swaying in his favour.

 

///

 The tail had only gotten closer and closer during their time together, until Therese had spotted it in the car park at the motel they were staying in, in a town call Waterloo.

“Hey, would you mind grabbing some ice, the drinks have been warmed by the food.” Therese asked sweetly and obviously Carol did. Why wouldn’t she? It was then Therese placed her mics around the room and one in a plant pot outside. Carol was none the wiser.

When they had eaten Therese could still sense the blonde’s twitchiness. She decided to go to the bathroom, and see if she would give anything up when alone.

She did thankfully, and even though she only heard one side of Carol’s conversation she could tell that Carol did not want to follow through with what needed to happen, but feared the other option so much that she had no choice.

Therese binned her earpiece, looking at it solemnly, knowing what she would have to face, what she would have to talk Carol out of doing. As soon as that gun was raised Carol would be sent to court and straight to jail, she would go down with the rest of them.

She let a tear fall and then another. She wasn’t exactly sure why she was crying, perhaps it was because the only person she thought she had shared a connection with was now willing to kill her. Perhaps something more than that.

Either way she cleaned herself up, re-entering the room. Mustering some fake chit chat she spoke, “You know the shower’s looks quite nice in this hostel. I would never have thought of going on a trip like this. I’m glad you dragged me along. I’ve never had anyone do anything like this for me… ever.” She was stopped in her tracks when she saw the blonde in the bed, in that fur.

When she had picked it up, she hadn’t thought much of it. She thought it was pretty hot, but now Carol was laid in their bed, her eyes glossed over, unfeeling, Therese saw the woman she had seen in the photos at Thomas Tucker’s house that night.

She saw the woman that had tucked herself away and become someone else, because the reality was just too painful to bear witness to.

Therese tried, she tried everything she could think of from all those nights together, the things that would make Carol hum and moan, feel _something_ , but there was nothing. She stilled until the blonde opened her eyes. “Tell me you need me.” She said trying to pierce this rough exterior but it proved too difficult.

Instead Carol had fucked her roughly, trying to tear her mind from the situation when it had done anything but. Therese came under Carol’s hand anyway, and felt rather guilty for doing so. And when she had tried to reciprocate and had been coolly brushed over she decided enough was enough.

She had begun to walk towards the bathroom but she had barely gotten two steps before the blonde was turning her back around, claiming her lips and kissing her passionately, deeper than ever before. When they pulled back Therese saw her Carol looking straight through her, only to hear three deadly words fall from her lips. “I love you.”

They had never said it before. Neither of them, it was something they had tiptoed around in a way. At first Therese was going to plaster on a fake smile and say it back with little feeling, but as she prepared herself she saw the worry of Carol’s words form over the blonde’s face.

It was real.

She knew then that all of this had been real for both of them. Carol did love her. Which is perhaps why all of this was proving so difficult. Therese leant forward kissing the blonde this time, taking over as she tried to draw her in closer, her hands slipping into the blonde locks their bodies pressed tightly together.

“I…” She hesitated, looking in the blonde’s eyes, so many forms of fear swirled in them. “I love you too.” They simply stood there and smiled at one another. Therese knew what was coming next, she could feel it in her gut, so she relished these few tainted moments. “Ok…” She said pecking her a few more times and then heading to the bathroom.

All she could do now was wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: Beginning of Skullduggery: Part C, AKA a continuation from Chapter 11: Waterloo, just with both Carol and Therese's perspectives. 
> 
> Come talk to me down below ;)


	17. The Deceiver

Therese wasn’t surprised, by the gun to her face or the indecision on the blonde’s face. But she was upset and angry at how the blonde’s decision would change things between them. If Carol fell she would be there to catch her, before even dropping a metre. And now as Carol crumbled she felt she had no choice but to let her hit the floor.

But Therese had a choice of what to do next.

And even though she was hurt by the betrayal and torn by what was true and what was false in their relationship, she was merciful, and as much as she didn’t want to admit it to herself, she really was in love with Carol.

Even this version. Such a broken person. She reminisced over the first time she had laid eyes on Carol. She was enraptured by her beauty. Enthralled by the way she was able to juggle two lives. Enamoured by the amount of emotion she could put into this act.

But slowly, ever so slowly, Therese began to see cracks. Carol was beautiful, but most beautiful when stripped naked, hair unruly on a pillow, face bare and relaxed, concealed stress lines having a breath. Carol didn’t juggle her two lives, they were balls, attached to chains, which were bound to her bones. Carol didn’t put emotion into this act. She allowed herself to be seen by the first time in decades.

Therese easily disabled the blonde pulling her into the shower, caging her in, pulling her close like she had done a thousand times before, but here it felt so unnatural.

“We need to talk. And I need you to listen.” Therese whispered, increasing the shower pressure to drown out their speech, she had to be careful, even if it meant that the water would beat down on them.

Therese couldn’t see the tears due to the water already running down their faces but she knew Carol was crying by the way her body convulsed and her fingertips whitened on the shower tiles to refrain herself from holding the blonde. “Therese-“

“I said listen.” She said squeezing Carol’s wrist trying to keep her composure. Her body was at war with itself. Their whole dynamic was so twisted, so, fragile.

“I’m so sorry.” Therese could see it was tearing the blonde apart. Carol could feel her humanity melting inside of her, dripping off each of her organs and pooling in her gut.

Therese wanted to do nothing but hold her, whisper reassurance, no matter how mad she was, but there was no time for compassion. “Look, I’m trying to help you, if you don’t listen to me you will go to jail for the rest of your life, maximum security. You will never see the light of day again.”

“I probably deserve it.” She cried leaning her head onto the brunette’s chest but Therese pushed her back against the shower wall, drowning out the voice inside of her that told her to press her lips to Carol’s forehead and allow her to catch her breath.

“Carol, we don’t have much time.” She said as a reminder to herself mostly, watching Carol’s arms raise to hug herself. “Look at me!” She whispered, putting a hand underneath her chin to direct her face to her own. “Breathe, Carol.” She saw Carol nod, taking deep breaths, still crying, and eyes bloodshot. “This whole place is rigged.”

She lowered her hand from the blonde’s chin. “I nearly killed you.” Carol whimpered, looking down at her shaking hands, ones that once shook around the handle of a gun. “I don’t even know who I am Therese. I don’t know who I am anymore. I’m so sorry-”

“The sound of the shower is drowning us out now but as soon as we get out they will hear every word. Nod if you understand.” Carol nodded, watching the brunette’s gaze flutter away as she did, as if questioning herself but the green orbs snapped back after a moment of internal thought. “Why did you try to kill me, Carol?” The blonde thought she heard a wobble in the brunette’s voice but she had no idea when it came to anything about Therese now.

It all came flooding back now, why she had even touched that gun. There was too much at stake. “Therese I- he’s going to kill her.”

“Kill who?” Therese asked, this was taking too long. “Kill who, Carol?”

“Rindy. M-My…” And then it occurred to Carol she would have to confess even more to the brunette. “I have a husband his name is… Harge, he… he has Rindy…”

“God dammit Carol!” She whispered. “Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you just…” Therese was so angry. There had been so many possible outs and this is the one Carol had chosen to take. She had spent nights praying that the blonde would simply turn over and confess, yet here is where they stood. “You will do exactly as I say or you will go to prison. Understand? And then Rindy may as well be dead, she’ll be thrown into the system and I’ve been there. With what that girl’s been through it will ruin her.”

Carol begun to slide down the wall. She was going to lose everything. Her world was falling in on itself, she was just so _confused_. She begun to whisper to herself. It was all over. Everything had imploded, and she was trapped under the rubble. And it hadn’t been merciful and killed her. She was going to lose Rindy and Abby. And then she was going to be thrown into a cage, knowing that Therese hated her too. Not even knowing who Therese was or why she was saying these things.

She dragged Carol onto her feet, caging her wrists against the wall. “Pull yourself together.” She spat. Carol didn’t recognise her like this. And neither did Therese. But this is who she had to be, she was on a clock.

“Therese...” Carol plead before letting her head hang. She couldn’t look at the unfeeling face of her lover for a second more. And she couldn’t even stand herself in this moment. After all of this the person she was most angry at was herself.

“Look, I’m going to sort this... How long did you have before…” Therese bit her lip hard, taking a deep breath. “… before you had to kill me?”

Carol lifted her head, her face empty. “About 5 and a half hours now.” She said, her face straight, eyes red, voice hollow.

“Ok, we can work with that.” Therese nodded, trying to think faster, letting Carol’s arms go.

 _We?_ The first question to hit Carol’s head. “Who can? Who’s listening? Who’s we? Who _are_ you?”

“That’s… classified.” Therese admitted.

“ _Classified_?” _Who is she?_ “What the hell is going on- Wait!” She cried as Therese left the shower, turning off the shower and grabbing their robes, flinging the tartan material at the blonde. “Therese! Please!” She cried out, breathing heavily, but Therese ignored her, picking up the parts of the gun from the sink before leaving.

She closed the door behind her sighing inaudibly looking at the ceiling as a tear fell and one more. But she steeled herself, turning to stone, throwing the parts of the gun on the bed.

Carol walked out of the bathroom, in that tartan robe Therese loved, the ends of her hair wet, her face bare, she could see thin veins under her porcelain skin, so faint compared to the deep red angry ones that forked across the whites of her eyes.

Therese was sat on the bed cleaning the gun down of prints. She raised slowly, picking up the assembled parts with the bed sheet, placing it back in Carol’s case where Phil had said he had found it. Carol didn’t know it now, but Therese was saving her life.

_She knew exactly where it was. She knew it was there all along. Yet she told me she loved me anyway. Is any of this real? Who is she? Did she bug the room? Bug the room for who? Why me? Does… does she actually love me? Do I love her or am I in love with the Therese I thought she was? Does she hate me? Has everything she ever told me been a lie? If so, how could she look me in the face, meet my gaze every morning, tell me she loved me? Where do we go from here?_

Therese picked up a note pad from the side table and a pencil. ‘Confess. Start with _Therese I have something to tell you._ Do it now.’

Therese put the pad down after seeing Carol’s eyes wander over it. She sat cross legged on the bed, gesturing for Carol to join her. They mirrored each other’s positions. “Therese, I have something to tell you…”

“What is it, babe?” Carol’s head snapped up. There she was, the Therese Carol thought she was. She had fallen in love with a character. And it was like it was taunting her. Her lover’s voice coming out of someone who looked just like her, but in every way was not. It was like a bitch slap. _But what more did I expect? It’s a double pleasure to deceive the deceiver._

Therese wrote on the notepad. ‘Tell me you don’t know what to do. Leave out what just happened in the bathroom. Rindy is in danger.’

Carol sighed. She wanted to throw herself in Therese’s arms and tell her everything truly. She wanted to do that with _her_ Therese. Her Angel. Not this hidden version of her.

“I’m not who you think I am…”

“Go on…”

 

///

 

She did. She told her everything. Every lie, every detail. The blackmail and deceit. And at the end of it all, Therese knocked on the locked door that lead to the other room. A key turned in it and three men and a woman walked in.

“Excuse me, Miss, my name is Agent Semco. I know this must all be quite a shock but I need you to listen.” He said gruffly, his feathers all ruffled as he was finally face to face with the woman he had to listen to Therese fuck and love and laugh and live with day in and day out. He had a slight smirk as he wouldn’t have to anymore but was still annoyed all the same. Threatened. Not that he would ever admit it.

“I’m sorry?” Carol said, looking away from the brunette that had barely looked at her since they had left the bathroom even during her confession.

“What were you meant to do after killing Agent Belivet? Who’s going to take this evidence? You?” Richard asked with his notebook and pen waiting.

“There’s a man on a bike waiting outside. He was going to take a picture send it to Harge. Then I would drive back and collect my daughter.” Carol said seeing that the brunette was listening even if she wasn’t looking. “I’m sorry but who exactly are you people?”

Carol was blatantly ignored as they started setting up. Not looking at her once as they removed the gun from Carol’s case and had Therese lay on the floor. Gen took out two pints of blood from a chilled case and pierced the bags, pouring them over the brunette as Richard tried to get the blonde’s attention.

“We’re part of the CIA, ma’am. Agent Belivet has been undercover, just like yourself for the past few months to gain Intel and evidence on your husband, Harge Aird.”

It suddenly all made sense. But none of it did at the same time. She had met one of the Agents before. _Dannie?_ She thought. What a confusing and elaborate play they had performed for one another. “She has?” Therese didn’t look at her. She found herself getting angry. Her life had been one lie after another.

“Yes ma’am.”

Why had she been pulled into another? It was enough to be blackmailed into a life with a man you hate but another thing to get your heartbroken in the process by the woman you love. “Why me?” _Why would you make me fall in love with you? How could you let me be vulnerable with you? Why keep this going so long if you were only after Harge all this time?_ “Why not just infiltrate the organisation?”

“I’m sorry ma’am that is strictly classified.” Richard said automatically.

“Classified?” She scoffed. “I think I deserve to know!”

“It’s because you were a weak link.” Therese spoke up looking to the ceiling. “You and you’re daughter. You were a weak spot in a very strong organisation.” She said, turning her head to look at the blonde. “And as you were doing exactly the same to me. We were both being people we weren’t for Harge Aird. So no… no you didn’t deserve to know.”

There was hurt behind her words. Maybe it wasn’t all deception and treachery. Maybe there was something behind this. Carol knew she hadn’t been faking what she felt. And even though everything in her life told her not to she had hope. “Therese-“

“ _Agent_ Belivet.” The brunette corrected, her voice firm. Going into this she hadn’t intended to be so cruel. But this was an end game now. It wasn’t that she had no empathy, but something did change when she turned around in that shower. _Would she have really pulled that trigger? Could she kill me?_ She was unsure. And it was at that moment that the walls began construction. Closing in the version of herself that had grown over the months, leaving her a shell.

Suddenly Carol had nothing more to say. She only had words for Therese. Not Agent Belivet.

Both women had so many words for each other. So many questions to be answered. But right now, Carol was absorbing the fact that once more she was a pawn in a very large game, and Therese was trying to scrub the image of the blonde pointing a gun to her face from her mind, tuck it inside the impenetrable walls.

“Belivet, I’m gonna need you to stop moving and the rest of us to go into the bathroom.” Gen said once the brunette was covered in blood and positioned on the floor. They all began to head to the bathroom. “Not you Carol. I need you to call in that biker. And not to say a word about us. Your daughter’s life depends on it. When the photo has been taken Agent Belivet will take care of the situation. To not comply would be an obstruction of justice do you understand?”

Did she have a choice? “Y-Yes I understand…” And with that the gun was pointed to the ceiling and two shots were let off before Gen put the gun into her hand and joined the other’s in the bathroom. They were alone now. She pondered on whether to say something to the bloodied brunette. “Ther-“

“We don’t have time for this Carol just call him in.” She said, not moving from her stilled and choreographed position on the floor. Carol stood their momentarily. She knew she shouldn’t be shocked. She had been lying, who said Therese couldn’t.

She opened the motel door, waving over the biker. He must be new. She didn’t recognise him when he removed his helmet. “You need to send a picture to Harge now… He’s going to kill my daughter. Please.” She begged, pointing to Therese’s still lifeless body. She was good at playing dead. But that no longer surprised the blonde. _She played me._

Carol was pulled from her thoughts when the biker’s thumb hovered over the capture button. “How much do you want to have that photo sent?” He said, not taking his eyes off of Therese’s body.

“Excuse me?” Carol said not quite believing the words falling from his mouth. “Send the picture. Please… I-I … my daughter-” She said trying to take the phone from him to take it herself but he pushed her off, sending her sprawling onto the bed.

“What are you going to do for me?” He said, taking off his leather gloves setting the phone out of reach before nearing the blonde. He lurched out grabbing her ankle so she kicked him in the making red gush from his nose.

“I am Harge’s wife!”

“Son of a bitch.” He said clutching his nose, wiping red on the back of his hand. “Don’t you get it?! I hold your life in my fucking hands! I hold your daughter’s life in my fucking hands!” He said running at her, grabbing her neck as he pressed her against the wall. “You killed the only person who might have fought for you in this world. Did you really think he was going to let you ride off into the sunset with this girl because you asked?”

“Therese.” She managed to whisper out but his grip tightened, and the brunette hadn’t budged.

She was beginning to lose consciousness, black spots appearing in her vision as she clawed at his hand. “Calling out for your dead girlfriend isn’t going to bring her ba-“ The shattering of pottery cut him off as a lamp base was swung at his head, breaking on contact and knocking him out.

Carol clutched at her throat, finally able to breathe as he fell before looking up the brunette who held the remnants of the lamp, nostrils flared, breathing sporadically, meeting her gaze, covered in blood.

“Therese.” Carol croaked as the lamp dropped from her hands. She didn’t know whether to beg for forgiveness or run into the brunette’s arms.

“Fuck, Belivet.” She heard, taking both of their attention as the team came through the door, looking down at the unconscious biker.

Therese could feel her fingers itching, to inspect the blonde’s neck run her hands through her hair and ask if she was ok. Say she was sorry for not intervening earlier. But as Agent Cantrell swiftly moved past her, the breeze seemed to knock her out of her weak moment, her façade hardening again.

“The phone’s on the side, just, take the fucking photo and let’s get out of here.” She said returning expertly to her position on the floor. Gen looked over Carol’s throat as Phil took Therese’s picture sending it off.

“They’re in a hotel in Brooklyn.” He said receiving a message back. “They’re going to wait for her. The drive to New York is around 17 hours. The plane is only 3. I’ll have a jet ready to take off from the tarmac in an hour. They won’t know what’s hit them. ”

“We better get moving then. Alert the NYPD we could use their assistance and HQ, we have the element of surprise.” Richard said running into their adjoining room to pack everything up.

“Let’s go. You need to get dressed. Something inconspicuous preferably.” Gen said directing her attention at the blonde. Carol rose from her position slowly, seeing Therese move to change in the room next door, almost mechanically. She shifted her gaze to her own suitcase, pulling on a pair of jeans, trying to find a dressed down top whilst keeping her vision clear of tears when a crew neck CIA jumper landed on her case, but by the time she looked up to say something, anything, the brunette was gone.

Carol was handcuffed and put in the back of a blacked out SUV. Therese stood just outside, her speech inaudible, gaze purposely not looking towards the car Carol sat in as she had the rundown of information, another man connecting the biker’s phone to his laptop as they entered their own SUV.

Another that she would later know as her interviewer, Phil McElroy drove her to an airport where they all boarded a plane. They landed in New York, Therese and Carol spending the entire flight faced away from each other, no matter how much both of them wanted to turn around.

After they were escorted separate ways. Carol was thrown into a cell. And she sat there with her own thoughts to torment her for 5 hours.

She was pulled out. Phil interviewed her under the alias of Jack, and she was dragged out kicking and screaming.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo many questions, so little time ;)


	18. Black Widow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The note below completely unrelated to the story but related to the title, so feel free to skip  
> (Also skip straight to the story if you are squeamish or have a problem with dark Ancient greek mythology)
> 
> A spider is an Arachnid. The word Arachnid comes from the Ancient Greek myth of Arachne. There are three versions to the myth. 
> 
> 1\. Arachne boasted of her amazing weaving ability and infuriated, Athena (God of Wisdom) challenged her to a contest. Athena's woven scenes depicted Gods punishing humans who thought themselves equal to Gods, and Arachne's woven scenes depicted Gods abusing humans. Arachne's was clearly better, and Athena, enraged due to the nature of Arachne's work, transformed her into a spider, doomed to weave for eternity.
> 
> 2\. In another version, the loser of the contest would never be allowed to touch a spindle or loom again. And Arachne lost. So out of pity, Athena turned her into a spider so she could continue weave without breaking the rules of the contest. 
> 
> 3\. In the last and darkest version, Athena wove a scene depicting her winning Athens over Poseidon, and Arachne wove a scene of Zeus making various advances on mortal women. Athena recognised Arachne's skill however wanted to teach her to be morehumble and respectful to the gods, so pressed a finger to Arachne's forehead. She became so wracked with guilt and shame she hung herself. And Athena brought her back to life as a spider so she could weave all of her life.

Therese slid out of the SUV, boarding the plane swiftly, taking her seat making sure it faced away from Carol’s. She fixed up all of her gear, checking it and rechecking, doing her best to stay away from the minibar which taunted her, but she needed her full focus if she wanted to join the mission to save Rindy.

“And there’s a team already there? Briefed?” She asked, two hours into the flight getting more and more restless knowing the blonde was just behind her.

“Everything is set and ready to go.” Dannie reassured.

“Do they have the location from the biker?” She asked, checking the rounds in her gun.

He could see she was in a place of her own, checking over all her equipment, by the book. “Yes.”

“And C- Mrs Aird?” She corrected keeping her voice hushed.

“She will be interrogated and then put into transit.”

“I want all information withheld until we are certain everyone is safe. There needs to be a raid at 645, Harge’s residence and the holding point he has Abby and Rindy in and they need to happen at the same time or there could be necessary fatalities. These boys are professional, and on bikes too. We should put up road blocks. ”

“Belivet-” Dannie tried but she was spiralling.

“They’ll need a safe house in New York, perhaps a psychologist and a tutor for Rindy. New passports and ID’s because Harge has too many connections there’s no way he’s going to let this go.”

“Belivet-“

“After her interrogation I want Carol under 24 hour surveillance. We need Aird and as many of his men alive so we can put them away, they are contract killers and they will not stop. We must get Rindy alive, she is an innocent and a priority. And Harge will use her as a bargaining chip if it means-“

“Therese!” She felt hands come down on her shoulders. “You need to calm down, everything is being sorted… Take a breath, this is nearly all over.”

“Yeah… yeah it is…” She said, taking a deep breath as he squeezed her shoulders. She remembered how to breathe and chastised herself internally for being so afflicted.

“What happened in there?” He frowned sitting back in his seat, now Richard was interested.

“What do you mean?” Therese said defensively. “We ate, we had sex, she confessed. End of story.”

“You were in the bathroom a long time, did anything happen in there?” Dannie asked, recalling the events before Carol’s confession.

“Apart from fucking her against the wall? No.” She said monotonously. It was cold and unfeeling, and it made Richard gut twist.

“You know maybe after this you should take a few days off.” Richard suggested.

“There have been rumours of a case abroad, in Russia, run by the CIA. I had a look and they want to recruit me. I know the language. I’ve been thinking of putting myself forward.” Therese said staring out of the window. She needed to get as far away from this mission as possible.

Dannie’s eyes widened. “I’ve heard of that case… it’s… it’s a suicide mission.”

“Or a career defining one.” Therese quipped. Sure it was dangerous, any covert operation in Russia was dangerous, but getting buried in something with high stakes and consequences would allow her to get lost in her character. Which means she didn’t have to be Therese anymore. She wouldn’t have to be the person only the blonde really knew.

“By career defining you mean the one written on your gravestone, if you’re lucky enough to get one!” Therese didn’t even flinch. Dannie sighed, leaning out to see Carol entering the plane bathroom. “She really did a number on you huh?”

Her eyes darted to him, daggers flying from her scrutiny. “This was a mission, one that is coming to a close. Nothing more, nothing less.”

“Fine. Fine…” Dannie relented.

“Odds on her becoming someone’s bitch in prison.” Richard scoffed quietly, trying to lighten the mood, nudging Dannie’s arm with his elbow. “A pretty thing like her, she’s going to be eaten alive, literally. Although, I don’t know, I kind of see her making someone else her bitch.” He winked. “Then again, she’ll probably be in the seventh heaven. They’ll have a lot more experience than Belivet here.”

Dannie could see Therese’s knuckles whiten. “Richard-“

“What? Just speaking the truth. Maybe we should make a plea for solitary. A cage full of pussies? Wouldn’t really be a punishment, would it?”

“Richard _stop_.”

“Lighten up will you? I mean, at least now she won’t go falling in love with straight undercover girls. She can stick to her own-”

Snap.

Therese lunged from her seat, throwing his laptop to the adjoining seat, pushing her forearm against his neck, pinning his wrists down with her knees. “You just don’t know when to shut your mouth do you?” He tried to call for Dannie but Therese pressed on his windpipe harder, whispering through gritted teeth. “What makes you think you have the right to open your mouth to speak on my sexuality on my behalf, or Carol’s sexuality on her behalf? Just because I fucked you out of pity? Out of need? I had a sexual urge, you were the closest person and not a day goes by where I don’t regret giving you possibly the best night of your life.”

“Belivet…” The brunette heard Dannie’s voice as a distant whisper. “Ok, Belivet that’s enough, he’s going purple.” She couldn’t help but press down harder and watch him froth a little. “Therese, don’t make me drag you off him.” Dannie sighed.

“Therese?” There was that voice again. Carol had just come out of the on board bathroom. It killed Therese a little bit inside the effect that her voice had on her. The effect it has always had on her. She turned her head to the side, not needing to see Carol, just feeling her presence. Therese sighed.

She finally let go, getting off him as quickly as possible as he spluttered.  “You say one more word and I will have you throw you from this plane without a parachute. Understand?”

He nodded clutching his neck.

Therese could feel Carol’s eyes upon her. She always could. It was the feeling in the back of your throat, just before you swallowed. A sixth sense. But she swallowed it down and sat in her seat, desperate to make it go away.

“Please fasten seatbelts as we approach landing.” She heard the tannoy say. She looked back out of the window distantly, ignoring Richard’s bruised and threatening looks. She knew Karma would slap her for doing that. Slap her for losing her calm demeanour, and acting like, what seemed like now, an uncontrolled child. But right now she didn’t care. She was trying to sort out the chaos in her head.

 

///

 

 

“Aird!” Carol heard the haunting word reverberate through her cell door as keys clanged in the lock. She stood abruptly. She had only been left to calm down 30 minutes ago. Phil walked in.

“Jack.” She said recognising him as he stepped through the doorway with a pair of handcuffs.

“Actually, its Phil. It wasn’t safe to tell you that until now. I have spoken with the people up top, a full signed confession of everything you just said with a lawyer present will clear your record. Hold out your wrists. You’re being put into transit.” He grabbed her by the wrist quite abruptly.

“Where to?” She asked urgently as the cold metal was slapped around her wrists.

“A safe house.”

She chased after him as he darted down the corridor. “How do you expect me to do anything when my daughter has a gun to her head and my life for the past 3 months has been a blatant lie?!”

“Look, I know it’s a lot to deal with. But Agent Belivet, she’s good at her job.”

“ _Agent_ Belivet?” Carol scoffed, still trying to wrap her head around everything.

“Yes, one of the top in her field.” Phil said protectively, even though he had known this woman for months.

“Why me? Why go after me? Why not just bypass my life and go for Harge.”

“She was right when she said you’re his weak spot. Before you, he had no ties to the outside world. And then you came along and Rindy. You were too perfect an opportunity. Easy to track. A pawn of Mr Aird himself, with all those seductions you were unwittingly leading us to him. We just had to put an easy seduction of our own in his way and voila. We got you. And therefore a path to him.”

“Fuck… But… I was never part of the organisation, I tried to keep Rindy as far away as possible.”

“Every time you met him at that ice cream parlour we would track him until we lost him. And over these past couple of months we have been able to find every single den in New York. The photos with the incriminating evidence was to lure out his secret weapon. You. Therese allowed you to take the negative once we realised he had killed his loose end to get you back. So we replaced the exhibition pieces with you to get under his skin. Which obviously worked as he had ordered you to kill Therese. And thanks to this giant game of cat and mouse we have a case full of evidence.”

“So long… How… how did she keep it up for so long?” She blinked as Phil signed form after form.

“The façade? I could ask the same to you.”

She looked up, testing the grip on her cuffs as she smirked to herself. Her stupid _stupid wreckless careless fucked up self_. “Well that’s easy. After a while I was no longer lying.”

“Then I’m sorry. Because Agent Belivet isn’t the person you fell in love with.”

“I see that now.” She said looking distantly to the SUV that approached them. “She’s cold.”

Phil chuckled. “She’s an agent. You have to have a healthy amount of detachment.” He said directing her inside the car. “Now rest, we have a safe house in New York set and ready to go. You’ll have a permanent detail outside the house and one inside to accompany you. They will be assigned in the morning. Until then all you can do is wait.”

“Wait…”

 

///

 

“Clear.” Therese called as she smoothly glided down the corridor with a SWAT team surrounding her. She had chosen to go on the mission to rescue Rindy. She wanted to see the devil himself. She wanted him to see her.

“Clear.” She heard someone copy as they formed a semi-circle around the door. She placed her back on the wall just to the right of the door, and burst in, gun raised when her comrade had kicked the door in.

“CIA HANDS IN THE AIR!” They shouted in unison, only to have an unhealthy amount of guns pointed back at them by Harge and his small swarm of Henchmen. He didn’t even act surprised. In fact he carried on pouring his whiskey, looking towards his daughter and Abby who were quaking.

“I want to see your warrant. I am an innocent business owner who is here on a city break with his child and friend.” He said nonchalantly to the team in black who were now standing off with the henchman.

“Cut the crap Harge. It’s over. 645. All of it. Everything.” She said, the barrel of her gun tracing his every move.

He stopped mid sip. “I recognise that voice.” He said, squinting slightly to see those green eyes. “Little Therese Belivet. Not so dead after all hmm.” He said checking his phone, tossing it away with the photo of her supposed dead body on it. “I would say I was surprised but I’m really not. My wife… seems to be rather infatuated with you…”

“PUT YOUR HANDS ABOVE YOUR HEAD AND TELL YOUR MEN TO STAND DOWN! NO ONE HAS TO GET HURT!” One of the team members shouted sticking to protocol.

“Oh but they do though! Don’t they…? If only she had put a bullet in that pretty little skull of yours.” He said pointing to the brunette. Before grunting, studying the stalemate. “Tell me how did you do it?”

“Do what?” Therese asked, her finger hovering dangerously close over the trigger.

“How did you get that beautiful creature, that blonde… goddess, how did you get her to love you back, even when it wasn’t actually you?” He was answered with silence. “It makes no sense so please, enlighten me.”

Therese thought momentarily, wondering if she should even answer. “I didn’t.” She settled on.

He chuckled to himself. “Oh but you did… Without even trying.” He said walking to the kitchen island before slamming down his whiskey glass. “Am I not _kind_?! Am I not _generous_?! I gave that woman _anything_ she could ever want and in return all I asked is that she wear pretty dresses and put trackers on slimey men…” He laughed again, more heartily this time. “But I am still… enamoured by that crazy bitch.”

It was odd to see a man so amused by his own downfall. But something in Therese couldn’t let him get away with thinking he did this all out of love. “What’s her favourite colour?” She asked, seeing him pause. “What was her middle name?” He turned to look at her this time. “Why does she have a tattoo of flowers?”

“What are you doing?” He sneered.

“You know nothing about her. You’re in love with a shell of a woman, Harge. Everyone is. They see this perfect figure and either instantly hate her. Or they love her, only to loathe her when they realise she isn’t the perfect woman. She was close to empty when you found her. But you can’t just fill someone with something you want them to be. You have to nurture them, back into who they really are.”

“And if all of that is true then we are more similar than you think Miss Belivet. We have both been spun into that Spider’s web. Wrapped in the silk of who we _think_ Carol is… but do we really know what is inside that beautiful head of hers? Do you know if she truly loves you?”

She realised then that she was too close to this mission. That she needed to turn back to the book before she slammed his face in with the butt of her gun. “Put your hands above your head Harge.”

“Oh it’s so fun when they don’t know. That’s the trouble with liars falling in love with liars. We never know when the ruse is well and truly up.” He smiled, looking over to Rindy and Abby, weighing up the situation, looking at the numbers, probabilities. “Ok.” He said putting on his suit jacket, straightening his tie in the mirror before raising his hands. “Guns down boys. Guns down.” He reiterated, and they obeyed like obedient dogs.

The team moved in cuffing them all, Therese’s gun saying trained on the leader as he was also arrested and read his rights. “Just like that? What’s the catch?” Nothing came that easy.

He was pushed towards the door with the rest of his crew. “The catch is… the poison we take and call medicine... Her days are numbered. You must be crazy to think that I’d let her go after she tore down my organisation and still… STILL isn’t mine…She may as well already be dead. And I will be back on the streets before you know it.” He smirked before being pushed out of the door. “Mark my fucking words Therese Belivet. You better run!” And then he was gone, all that was left were his shouts back to the hotel room. “RUN!”

 

///

 

Carol was guided into a safe house in the upper east side of Brooklyn. It was small and dingy, but it was better than the cell, and suddenly the best place on earth when she saw Abby sat across from Rindy in the living room.

“Sweetheart?” She asked gaining the child’s attention. They met each other half way as Carol’s eyes began to water, scooping up her daughter into her arms only to fall to her knees. “Oh thank goodness you’re ok.” She cried, burying her face in her daughters shoulder, sitting like that until the tears slowed before pulling back.

“Carol…” She heard, so she looked up to find Abby placing a hand on her shoulder. “Therese… er she-“

“Is she here?” Carol asked looking around.

“No… She er-“

“Is she alright?” The more Abby delayed the worse her anxiety got.

“She spoke to Harge, and he put a death threat on all of our lives… I’m not quite sure what this means for us but… It didn’t look good.”

 

///

 

“Well done team. We have managed to close down 645 and in doing so have found so many leads, some international, some national. These will be divided into smaller cases. But those will not be our concerns. Only a few have scampered away, but they won’t be at large for long. Harge and his men will be trialled. The US can rest a little easier tonight.”

There was a round of applause, but Therese’s hands stopped joining when she saw the look Robichek was giving her. She excused herself and followed the red head into her office.

“I told you the road trip was worth it.” Therese smiled standing straight, placing her hands behind her back.

“Yes… it seems it was.” Robichek nodded, gesturing to the seat across from her desk which Therese took.

“What is it?” Therese asked, knowing something was playing on her bosses’ mind. “I know you have something to say…”

She took a deep breath. “You have applied for the mission to Russia.” She said picking up a file, an immaculate one. “We formally reject your application.” She sighed sliding it across the table. “In fact, we can’t have you on this team…”

Therese picked up her file, looking down at its straight edges before looking up, shell shocked. “W-Why? I… There were no casualties. We brought down a Hit team. I don’t understand.”

“Between me and you… Harge isn’t _really_ going down for this.” Robichek rubbed at her forehead.

“WHAT?!”

“The links he has inside prison are strong… and the ones on the outside are even stronger we found thousands of assassins, and even now, Harge’s phone calls blowing through the roofs. Plus some of his men are getting shorter sentences. You, Carol, Abby, Rindy, none of you are safe.”

She could barely believe her ears. After everything they had done. “Well, then give me a new ID or something.”

“I’m afraid a new name and date of birth won’t cover this one Belivet. We are thinking entire new relocation. A new life.” Therese knew what that meant. She would be shipped out to somewhere remote and sunny. A basic paradise. Given a hobby and a new name and left to float through life.

“You’re kidding me? Just, send me to Russia to do this mission, I’ll be so deep undercover no one will-“

“I’m sorry. I can’t-“

“Why not?!” She said standing the chair rolling out beneath her, fists clenched at how her whole career was tumbling and spiralling down the drain.

“… He has connections with the people that are on that mission.” Robichek said keeping her effortless cool.

“Ok, so I won’t go to Russia, can I not still be part of the team?” She tried to bargain.

“Maybe one day… but that day isn’t soon I’m afraid.” The look in her bosses’ eyes meant a finality had come to this part of their conversation. There was no point in fighting it.

“So this is it?” Therese sighed, nodding. Of course this would be it. The case that ruined her on the inside would also ruin everything else she held onto on the outside.

“Not necessarily.” There was a flicker of hope. “Trust me, when the board told me, I wasn’t ready to let go of one of our top agents in the field. So I negotiated a deal. A plea of sorts.”

“Thank God.” She thought she was about to lose everything.

“A promotion. The N1 programme.” Therese’s hope stopped in a heartbeat.

“The N1 programme?” She scoffed. “…A contract killer.”

“You wouldn’t be killing for money-”

“Well I would have a target to shoot and get paid for it. Correct me if I’m not mistaken but in my dictionary that is killing for money… You’re solution to all of this is to make me as bad as Harge Aird?”

“I know it isn’t you Therese.” Robichek said, holding up her hands as the brunette paced. “But it’s the only thing I could swing.” She said pulling out another file, with Therese’s personal number on it next to the N1 programme logo.

She picked it up, never foreseeing herself ending up this way. “… Who is the first target?” She asked her eyes diverting from the new shiny black file to what would become her old boss.

“Have a look for yourself.” She gestured, knowing what Therese’s response would be once she opened it. She almost didn’t give the brunette this file. She could have told her there was nothing else. She didn’t want to see what Therese would become after coming out of this programme. But she knew it was Therese’s choice. Even if it was one she hoped and prayed she wouldn’t make.

“When do I start?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts? ;)


End file.
